(NSFW) Would you let your son/daughter be a pornstar?

When you say “let,” it sounds like you are the one in control of son/daughter. This makes me think that they’re not a minor, and this is illegal in the porn industry.

If they’re not minors, but still living in your house and you’re against the idea, then I wouldn’t allow them to live in the house while in the profession. They’re 18+ and they get to decide what they ultimately want to do, especially if it’s legal for them to do it, but it’s your house and you get to decide what kind of tenants you want living there.

If they’re not minors and they’re not living with you, then I don’t think you really have the right to force them to not follow that path. But I think you should be allowed to voice your opinion against the idea (if you were), and hope that your son/daughter would see your side of it.
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if you’re asking for my own personal opinion of what I would do in the situation, it would depend on how old they were. If they were just turning 18, I would strongly influence them away from the situation. If they were in their 20s-30s, whatever.

When they are young, teach them in the way they should go and when they are older they shall not depart from it.

I would not choose that life style for my children (if I had any), but if, as an adult, they chose that life, I would still love them. I may not like them, but I couldn’t turn my back on them.

I would rather them be a porn star than join the military any day. When they’re adults, they will make their own decisions and I will be there to help them research through all the possibilities, angles and consequences. I do not look down on sex workers.

Have to agree with @Simone_De_Beauvoir: better a porn star than a soldier.

I doubt I would have any choice in the matter, and hopefully I wouldn’t be trying to control my adult offspring anyway. But assuming I did, I would not let my son or daughter be a porn star. Morally, I would be fine with it. Germ-wise, I would not be. If there is any kissing or licking (and there must be!), that means spreading all kind of poxes, pandemics, and plagues. Alliteration, whoo! And forget STD’s. I know porn stars are strictly tested, but I would still worry.

Well, what can one really do? Either turn your back on them, or just accept what it is that they choose to do and still be there for them, even though you may not approve of it. I’d never approve of it, but as long as they’re decent human beings and respectful of their parents etc, i can’t imagine that i would completely turn my back on them.

I would like to believe (since this is a hypothetical question) that I would have instilled a better outlook on life to them. So that they do not go down that dark path.

I would provide what ever is needed to help them follow a better “dream”.

IE a non-issue.

It would matter why they were doing it. If they were doing it because they absolutely loved sex, I would encourage them to get therapy. If they were doing it for money because they couldn’t make money any other way, I’d be willing to help them get training for a different kind of job, and I’d probably be willing to support them as they got the training.

But it’s really hard to imagine them wanting a job like that. It seems like a lot of weird stuff would have to happen for them to end up in such a job. They would probably have had to flunk out of several schools. To do that, they’d probably have to be mentally ill. In which case, we probably would have provided different help.

@wundayatta Asia Carrera was a famous child pianist, performing in large concert halls in NYC. Full scholorship to university, but just had more fun at the strip clubs and having sex. I don’t see it as desperate or the work of a mentally ill person. She found what she loved, and she’s not the only one.
Some people go down that path for the wrong reasons, but not all do.

@arpinum You could be right. I don’t know if you really want to us Asia Carrera as your example. Do you know how “famous child pianists” get made? Do you know what their self-esteem depends on?

This is a road I’ve been on, and while I didn’t end up in porn, I went to a related place. When you get a lot of pressure to be the greatest, and you aren’t the greatest, it’s very hard to find a way to like yourself. Being desired is what you crave. Sex is an easier way to get that sense of being desired.

The thing is, it’s pretty easy to convince yourself that you made this choice freely and it is something you really enjoy. Enjoy it you do. It also has consequences because you need more and more of it, and when it’s not there, you crash. Once it has a hold of you, it’s hard to get loose, and some people don’t even want to get loose.

Do they really want to be in this business? I think there’s room to reasonably question that without being all moralistic about it.

@wundayatta My issue with that is why does this industry get the whole ‘do they really want to do this?’ question but ‘normal’ industries don’t? Who really wants to work at Wal-Mart or do some administrative 9–5 or be someone’s assistant, etc, etc etc?

Oh, I don’t know, @Simone_De_Beauvoir. In my family, Walmart and McDonald’s jobs would probably be treated similarly to a porn job. No one wants a standard job. But we’re weird that way.

@wundayatta Well that’s neither here nor there. You probably don’t think working at Walmart is akin to being a pornstar.