It hasn’t really backfired on me, but I have tried to help someone out and it was a total waste of time. My SO has a buddy who can’t hold down a job. He’s arrogant, entitled, makes the same mistakes over and over again and will tell his employer to &$&^ off and walk off a job without any thought of the consequences. He’s repeated this pattern as long as we’ve known him. My SO met him when they were in the Army. Since he got out, his only work experience has been as a waiter, bar back, doorman at a bar, etc. and every time he gets a job he will start telling the owners they are running their business wrong or that they should promote him. He thinks he is a great cook, and so he’s tried to start his own business as a personal chef. He knows nothing about cooking. He thinks because he says he is a chef, that makes it so. Several times when he’s walked off a job, he’s ended up having to sell his belongings and sleep on people’s floors, etc.
Two years ago, after all his friends had a long heart to heart with him, he seemed to have an epiphany. He got a job with a large electronics chain after I worked on his resume for him. They sent him for training to a nearby city. My SO gave him money, loaned him a vehicle for a month so he could attend the training. Other friends let him live with them until he could get an apartment. He actually held the job for two years and we were all amazed and happy. It’s the first time he hasn’t lived in someone’s basement or has owned his own furniture, etc. This guy is 33 years old!
Well, two weeks ago he got angry at work because he apparently decided they should make him management, just because he felt they should. He ran his mouth and walked off the job. He was refused unemployment because he quit. He hasn’t done a single thing to get a job and posts on Facebook all day about playing X-box or asking what he should do today (Um, get a JOB?) and even posted “What kind of job do I want, President, movie star, action hero?” It’s not cute or clever. Today he posted that he went to a deli that is owned by a friend of my SO. This is what he said about it:
“I’m going to try and lend a hand through a friend that knows the guy that owns it. I hate trying to tell people how to run their place, but I could really show them a thing or two about how to run a restaurant.”
O.M.G. The “friend that knows the guy that owns it” is my SO, who will be mortified if this guy goes in there using his name as a reference and offends the owner, a man with years of restaurant experience who we like and respect a lot.
We’ve both had to try to turn a blind eye and ear to this man. We refuse to help him anymore. He is his own worst enemy and his own arrogance will continue to foil him forever. I’m done. So, helping him hasn’t personally backfired on me, but it’s been a huge waste of time because he hasn’t learned anything. If he didn’t like that good job he had after two years, he could have gone out and gotten another one before he quit. Now he can’t even use the one responsible job he’s had since the Army on his resume, because he walked out in a huff. He’s never had a job he didn’t either walk off in anger or get fired from.