Do you unnecessarily lead people on out of nature?
Asked by
lsdh182 (
566
)
October 24th, 2010
Ok, so i’m at university now and my boyfriend and I of a year broke up about 4 weeks into it. It wasn’t working and it wasn’t working even before we came. I’d stopped loving him. He was my first everything there was no one before him i’m not a boyfriend kinda girl, I didn’t even date people before him. Now i’m at uni my sex drive is going crazy, it’s safe to say me and my boyfriend didn’t have the best sex life. Mostly due to him. So i started to feel sexually attracted to someone a few weeks ago and we’ve started talking, he isn’t the most interesting person but man oh man am I attracted to him. But now, someone i’ve known since I started and became very good friends with, VERY good friends with whom i haven’t looked at in a sexual way or even fancied has started to say things to me that makes me think he looks at me differently. So tonight the group of us from various apartments watched a film and the second guy.. lets call him Paul was hugging me and stroking my face and stuff, we both laughed and it was very jokey and all but some parts were a bit more intense than others. Am I leading him on? Cos I didn’t object to it and infact i kind of liked it. But the first guy… “Peter” was in the room the whole time and I know Paul was aware of that and that I fancy him. Am I over-thinking everything?
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8 Answers
I should also make it clear that I’m not looking for a relationship in anyway. More a.. hanging out with someone kind of deal.
Aw – have some fun, don’t get hurt and try not to hurt anyone.
@janbb thanks, i am having fun i just don’t wanna go screwing up friendships and stuff :/
If you’re just interested in Peter for sex, you need to make sure that Peter is clear on the fact that the relationship is friends with benefits, and that there is no commitment or relationship, and that you will date other people. You should probably do this before you start sleeping with Peter.
@lsdh182 Well, some screwing up comes with the territory of having fun and being at uni and being young….
If your sex drive is out in front of your ability to meet interesting mating partners, it’s time to let your fingers do the walking through the—you figure out what. There are plenty of reasons not to just sleep around with every Tom, Dick and Hairy (puns intended), but there’s no need to let abstinence drive you crazy either.
With the gotta-get-laid pressure off, you will feel much more at ease to develop relationships centered mainly around friendship. You’ll be able to enjoy hanging out or inviting a friend to go out with a group of couples without feeling like a fifth wheel. And with the pressure off, sooner or later, you will meet someone who is right for you.
Good luck in the university.
@ETpro Thank you very much, wow I nearly lost sleep over this, i’m sure everything we’re all doing here as freshman is all in good taste and good fun. Now i gots to get laid. Haha, thanks for the helpful answers!
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