(NSFW) Virgins: Alluring or a total turn off?

I don’t care. Never have.

I really don’t care, but I have a tendency to think that virgins are young or simply not mature, so that is a turn off. I’m pretty sure a high percentage of humans have had sex before age 18, and if they have not by my age, I would think they were sheltered at a young age, religious, or just really high maintenence, which are all turn offs lol.

Lets put this in a different context and see how you feel about it. I’m a 51 year old woman. Do you think I want to be with a virgin or with a man who knows what the hell he is doing. And I am going to bet some pretty heavy duty money that most men my age feel the same way.
You are placing an illusion of wealth on something that really has no valuation at all. It’s like trying to tell someone that the guy who has never even welded a pipe is somehow a superior plumber. He ain’t and never will be until he gets massive experience. And the same applies to sex. If you only have another inept to go by….well you don’t learn very much.

@Joybird I was trying to speak to the starting couples of a relatively young and relatively same age. But I more than get your point on that one…

If it’s true at 50…it’s true at almost any age. Virginity means nothing more than that you don’t know what the heck you are doing. It has no legitimate value. The illusion of valuation is about the maidenhead equalling inheritance of power and wealth through the assurances of bloodlines. But in reality it has no value. We place value on it for the purpose of control or women in society and over who wealth is dispersed. End of arguement.

I disagree with what you’re saying @Joybird. I have been with virgins, and found at least one, really two, to have a natural ability in the bedroom.

Just speaking from personal experience. Sex isn’t rocket science. Or plumbing. Much of it is pretty innate. So it isn’t necessarily an issue of not knowing what you’re doing.

However, I do agree with your views on the value of virginity. Very true.

@noelleptc Understand how you feel. I only have had sex in monogamous relationships, but I’ve tried to get as many experiences as possible within those relationships. Resulting in about 4 partners.

Numbers are simply history…I am more concerned with the here and the now. No use living in the past!

Virginity has never been a turn-on for me. I’m with @Joybird that there’s no real value in virginity. And that goes for both my men and my women.
EDIT: When I was younger, it also didn’t matter to me if they were a virgin. Now I’m getting old enough that if they are still a virgin, they’re probably waiting for marriage or a serial killer, neither of which appeal to me.

Irrelevant

When I was dating,if I knew a guy had slept with alot of people,I wouldn’t have touched him with a 10 foot pole.Getting the clap is not on my to-do list.
I like discerning men,not a guy that would hump anything like a horny beagle.XD
As for virgins,I might have been fine with it when I was younger,but if I was dating now,I might wonder alot…

I don’t put a high value to it, but in one of those “all other things being equal” situations, I’d say it’s preferable for me. But not for the idea of her being undefiled, or the idea of me stealing her innocence, or anything like that.

I’m a guy who worries a lot. And I’m also (to put it lightly) a bit sexually inexperienced. I know my mind would be too busy worrying about performing below expectations to enjoy the experience properly.

@Sarcasm If you’re ever in Denver, I’ll teach you a few things…

I enjoyed my sexual experience with a virgin when I was one too. Now it would be pedophilia or just weird if he were in his 50’s like me.

I’ll go out on a limb and say no more men want a virgin than a virgin wanting a man with experience. But basically yeah, I’d want a virgin because she wouldn’t know what a lousey fuck I was.

@truecomedian That’s true lol. Even if you were really awesome, she would be baffled either way and love you forever :)

@papayalily Ahem. There will be none of that!

I’m not turned on by either, really.
I’m turned off by anyone who has slept with a lot of people… but other than that.. doesn’t matter.

A partner’s virginity has never had any value for me. On the other hand, like others, a partner with what seems to me to be an excessive amount of partners has been a definite turn off.

Both? There’s something alluring about knowing that, regardless of your performance, you’ll be a turning point in that person’s life.

The older I get, the more often I’m inclined to realize that I don’t want that responsibility, though.

I’d prefer a girl who knows what she was doing, but not one who has been with a ton of guys.

Conversely, a lot of girl’s fetishized the hell out of my own virginity when I still was one. I had a lot of girls offer to “help” me with knowing smiles and winks. It was weird.

So what is the acceptable amount of partners for men or women?

@palerider: In my mind then a relationship person is more desirable than one who’s just had a bunch of hookups. Excessive to me, more partners than their age in years or 20, whichever comes first. Heh.

@Neizvestnaya I agree with the relationship part. but my tolerable # would still be less than 10.

As a lot of people have alluded to here, I think it depends heavily on age.

With my first boyfriend at 19, I hoped for a virgin, like me, because it would be more exciting for us both to stumble through this together. I didn’t expect to date a virgin but I did kind of hope. Figuring out our preferences and kinks together has a charm to it for a long term relationship.

If I were to break up with him and start dating again… I really have no idea what my preference would be…

The older I get, the more lenient I would be on the guy’s number of previous sexual partners.

Also, while I theoretically don’t want a man-whore, if I met one and fell in love with him, I’d let it slide. But agreed on STDs… he’d have to get tested for everything.

Doesn’t matter if they’re a virgin or not. Most likely, though, at my age they wouldn’t be.

Like the others have said, I don’t need a butch whore who has dipped into Shirley’s, Kate’s, Bon Qui Qui’s, Ellie May’s and Wynona’s big brown beaver (along with 40 others).

In short, I think we almost unanimously agree that promiscuity is definitely unattractive.
EDIT: (Thinking to myself….I wonder why Sex and the City was such a big hit….nasty hos!)

@Fiddle_Playing_Creole_Bastard The helping virginal men thing is twofold: One, we are aware of the pressures men are under to be experienced Right Fucking Now, and since we’re past the point of being considered pure As Women Should Be (or caring about that shit), we don’t want a good guy going over to the dark side because he got teased too much or something. Two, in our society, men are seen as the experienced teachers who sweep in and take care of things for the poor little doe-eyed girls who just can’t do anything right. It’s very empowering to switch the roles around.

@papayalily, interesting. Makes sense, I suppose. I guess that means I can be a sexual conquistador now.

Younger people hope for virgins predominantly because they don’t want their partner to know how really inept they are and make comparisons. Comparison is the whole reason women were supposed to remain virgins….so they didn’t know what a lousy lay their spouses were and wouldn’t be inclined to look elsewhere. Ignorance ain’t bliss in regards to this issue. And it’s laughable to say that you can be experienced…just not too experienced. And whomever said sex was inate…not by a long shot. And that’s something alot of women experience first hand….men that have no clue whatsoever about how a women’s response system works and how to make it work at optimal levels. I have never been in the habit of asking about the number of notches on a man’s headboard and it always seems like the most gifted lovers have an exceptional number of notches something that they may indicate sooner or later. Practice in a variety of situations with a variety of partners does make damned near perfect. And remember….always take precautions against pregnancy and STD’s.