NSFW... Are you, can you be, do you like to be... nasty?

I just cannot be nasty in any way at all so it’s definitely not everybody. I can’t even fake being nasty.

What do you mean by nasty?

Like Janet Jackson or more like Madonna in the early 90’s? Pissing in your mouth nasty or shitting on the walls nasty? Choke fucking nasty or nipple clamps under your Sunday dress? There are so many different levels of nasty. You mean nasty, nasty or just nasty by middle America’s standards?

I sometimes leave my under crackers on right up to the last moment…......does this count? Grrrr…oh you nasty boy! XD

I’m like @downtide, it’s just not my thing. And, like @prolificus, depends on the definition of nasty! I’m an old traditional kind of guy and keep my bedroom activities the same. Besides, just doing it the traditional way is so much fun, why change! I’ve never gotten bored with the act itself….also, add some tender and caring moments to the act, and it doesn’t get any better than that.

It’s difficult sometimes for me to talk dirty out loud, but I can write dirty. I love writing nasty erotica.

@prolificus Like @judochop illustrates, there are many different levels. Which is why I suppose you asked for the qualification. It’s kind of like drugs… isn’t it? One can begin experimental and get a little cheeky, and then flat out go too far and start disembodying hamsters.

I know some people use porn as sort of an aphrodisiac. I think that’s a little nasty. Not for me at all. I’m more the Kama Sutra with Toys type of freak. Light bondage, roll playing, a little spanking here and there, wigs, masks, candles, hot wax, incense, and some great music (Dead Can Dance), and most of all, trust. And by no means is this to be pursued with a new lover. That would be embarrassing to say the least. But shouldn’t sex be capable of evolving between two willing partners into pretty much any arena they are willing to explore?

And this isn’t really about what I want done to me as much as what I enjoy doing to her. It’s more in line with wanting to create a memorable experience. It’s not about hurting or humiliating anyone.

A friend of mine thinks I’m puss with the light bondage. His idea of bondage is tying her up tight, inescapable, having his way with her, then leaving her there for hours as he goes grocery shopping, wash the car, visit mom, and mow the lawn, and not returning until his captive has pissed herself. Now that’s a bit too far for me, but he seems to have no shortage of girlfriends lining up for the experience, and often two at a time. He ties them together in a discombobulated cluster fuck and makes them call their mothers on the phone to say hello. I think it’s funny, but not for me. It seems all too humiliating.

I guess I’m wondering why that degree of nasty is appealing to some. Is it psychologically healthy, for the girls and for my friend? It seems to objectify the partner, and I’d rather avoid that.

I don’t judge others but I like to keep the loving sweet and passionate.

does that include talking dirty or roll playing? Are sweet and nasty mutually exclusive?

Nasty to some is tame to others. If you ever go on Fetlife, you will find many examples and levels of nasty. I think of myself as nasty, but believe me, most on Fetlife would think of me as tame.

My husband and I have some unique likes in the bedroom. I suppose some could call them nasty, but I don’t. We didn’t start off with those things though. For us, those things evolved as we grew more comfortable with each other and discussed them. It started slowly with one of us suggesting something we like and then going from there. So love and sex came before the other stuff for us. I know some people start right out with the other stuff though. It just depends on the people involved and what their sexual preferences are.

Well, I met somebody online and our relationship began as a very graphic exploration of fantasies and role play. Nothing was taboo or off-limits and we were very comfortable telling each other everything. Eventually, that comfort converted to genuine affection and friendship and now, when we talk it’s mostly about our pets and our workdays.
So, nasty to caring can happen. Is that what you meant?

How interesting… I wouldn’t have thought that possible. Did you ever meet in real life?

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies Not yet, though we hope to one day. We’ll probably hold hands and play cribbage ;-)

KamaSutra and Tantra, dirty talking, demonstrative passion yes…..all these other freak games you folks are discussing….no thanks. I don’t need to fuck up my sexual response by looking for more and more stimulation and sexual novelty. It becomes an addictive pattern of behavior.

Putting sprinkles on ice cream doesn’t necessarily make regular ice cream any less tasteful.

@Joybird: my sexual response is the same whether to vanilla or kinky. I get full whether i eat a plate of apples or a plate of lasagna. It’s a matter of variety being the spice of life.

I haven’t really explored anything offbeat besides some light tying up and a toy or two during sex, but I would definitely be open to exploring some other things, as long as it doesn’t get gross.

It has depended on my partners as to how open and how un threatened I feel, what kind of trust I think exists at the time. For me, “the nasty” has had attraction strongest when the relationship is newer, at the peak of my perceived maximum optimism/potential. It’s all been a dismal retreat from there back to vanilla sex and then to abstinence. It’s a pattern I’m not interested in repeating.

I believe if you are really compatible with the one you are with and can be yourself during sexual activities by letting go and enjoying yourself it is a beautiful thing… no matter what it is you are into. Some may prefer the sweet and passionate, others get really turned on and get off on being rough and nasty! I think there are certain nights for each, its about finding the right mood and moment to be each… there is nothing wrong with getting completely nasty and talking out all your dirtiest fantasies or thoughts as long as both are comfortable with that.