Why do people want to take care of the injured and not the healthy?

Because the wounded have all the problems and needs of the healthy PLUS their wound/injury. It’s a matter of prioritizing. People’s time is finite. They simply lack the ability to help or care for EVERYONE. So they choose to help the ones in the most need.

Of course, the injured bird needs help, and the healthy one doesn’t. There’s no point in trying to help the healthy bird, is there? You kind of answered your own question here. To expand on that, in this context, I’d imagine caretakers would want to intervene with nature as little as possible.

Do you take care of the wounded most of the time? Why? As a person going into healthcare, I’d imagine so. This isn’t to say that I’m not ever “wounded” – my family and friends provide me with a lot of support and I’m of the belief that you get what you give.

What do you do to show your care when you have a relationship like that? I’m confused as to where you’re taking this; are you talking about physical care or an emotional type of care, in the context of a romantic relationship? Generally, just about anything one would do to show their compassion in a given situation.

Do you avoid the wounded? Why? No, because if and when I’m wounded I dont exactly appreciate being avoided.

Have you ever had a chance for a relationship, but turned it down because the person was wounded? Again, confused with the ambiguity, but I’m going to go with yes and no. I like the challenge of trying to provide something someone is missing; I like people I could “fix”. However, There are certain situations that I specifically dont want to get involved in and therefore logical thinking overrides the emotional. It’s intuitive, though, sometimes I get that gut feeling to take a risk, lest I miss a good opportunity.

Those of us who put out bird feeders and bird baths might quibble with your example and, by extension, your theory.

The birds are not birds; they are people. It was a metaphor (and a bad one, apparently). The wounded have emotional wounds, not physical wounds. The caretakers are people who are attracted to those with emotional wounds for reasons I can guess at, but I’d like to hear from others about that. Sorry about the confusion. I’m not explaining myself very well.

I do get your metaphor, I’m responding with one of my own. I believe there ARE people who care for the healthy – they do it, for example, by nurturing everyday relationships through civility, affection, concern and simple attention. It’s just not as obvious as the care we give to the wounded because it’s so… ordinary. At least, if we’re doing it right.

@perg Oh, I see. I had thought about that, but not in terms of the metaphor. To continue the metaphor a bit further—what’s the difference between people who feed the birds and people who nurse the injured birds? Some people do both. Some may prefer one or the other. For those who have a definite preference, what would motivate that preference?

Hmm. Thrill of dealing with a crisis? There’s not a lot of glamor in day-to-day nurturing, I suppose. Or maybe it’s just not seeing the need until there is a crisis. If we haven’t beaten the bird metaphor to death – maybe a person who doesn’t put out seed figures the birds are fine on their own, until they see one that clearly isn’t. Does the care they administer at that point then lead them to better understanding of the bird’s daily needs? Or do they figure, once the crisis has passed, the bird once again can take care of itself?

As to the last part of your question – why someone would avoid the wounded – maybe it’s because the person is carrying wounds of their own, or they doubt their strength, or they simply don’t want to deal with the complications. It’s hard to nail down any of these motivations with one or even two or three explanations.

I understand what you’re saying and I agree with your premise, @wundayatta. Many injured birds were healthy at one point and one has to wonder: did they get hurt because of a lack of care?

I think healthy birds need to be tended to as well, maybe not as much or as vehemently as injured birds, but still to a certain degree. If you teach a bird how to fly, it will not fall of the nest and break its wing. If you teach it to fly well, it will not get hurt. If you show it some love, it may not feel the need to leave the nest as much.

On a somewhat related note, I think that this approach should be taken in all forms of health care. It is better for everyone to teach someone how to deal with the destructive behavior whether it’s physically destructive or mentally destructive than to deal with the aftermath.

There is the idea of triage. Ignore the basket cases and those who can make it on their own and concentrate on those who can survive only if given help.