Why do children suddenly become afraid of the dark?

The first answer would be that they have experienced something scary during the dark.

Second answer is that they have seen a scary movie, or a movie that scared them [children don’t always vocalize when they’re scared by a movie!!!], and the scariness haunts them at the time they can’t see anything around them [in the dark].

My first thing I would ask the boy would be “What are you scared of? Did you know Mommy is scared of ‘blah blah blah’.... After he shares, tell him of something you were scared of as a little girl. Make sure you initiate with what you are scared of.

Then move the conversation along, saying “Do [the thing he’s scared of] hide in the dark? Do they bother you at night? If you choose your words carefully, and make them as neutral as possible, he’s likely to over-share.

“Why do you want to visit mommy at night?” etc, etc

Most fears come from a traumatic event. It may not be a physical event but like watching a movie or a show where something the mind considers scary or bad happens may make the child think that when they can not see stuff ahead of them because of the dark they dont know what possibly might be waiting for them. I was scared of the dark. I still am to this day, all you can do to help the child is to show them it is alright and give them support. Mine started when I started to watch criminal shows.

This is the main reason I’m a proponent of restricting what children watch, because their minds are immature and usually not good at separating possibilities from impossibilities.

They are beginning to put a name to the emotions they feel.

This is sometimes very successful in a bid for attention.

They begin to realize that they are not always safe.

When their minds get to the age in which imagination starts to come into play, the shapes in a dark room look unfamiliar.

Remember monsters hiding in the closet or under the bed?

Heading back in time… It seems to stem from being in bed and still awake while left in the darkness. The drapes were shut, but enough light came through to cast shadows that created images of unexplainable things. Add in the half dream, half awake state at the age when one is mobile and able to communicate, and you end up with a child wanting some kind of comfort.

evolution… children used to be with parents thousands of years ago in the dark…consider buying a night-light or florescent stickers

I think being afraid of the dark is more psychological than simply saying it comes from watching scary movies, having vivid dreams, or thinking about monsters in the closet. For generations humans have demonstrated a species-wide fear of anything they don’t understand (take racial hostilities or recent US foreign policy decisions as recent examples). Seeing as we get something like 95% of our information from our eyes, it stands to reason that, with darkness comes uncertainty, with uncertainty comes a lack of knowledge (understanding), and with a lack of knowledge comes fear. I believe being scared of the dark (or being scared by anything for that matter) is related to this idea.

It’s because of the dawning awareness that not everything in their world is safe. The best we can do when this happens is express our love for them at every opportunity, try our best to reassure them, and yes… leave more lights on. : )

I think everyone who has said that it’s when fears develop is spot on. This combined with the over active imagination that very small children have.

When I was about three or four, there was this bag or pile of clothes or something in my closet that looked perfectly normal in the day but that I swear looked like a gorilla sitting at night. Because of this, I was absolutely convinced that my closet turned into a portal to a universe populated completely by gorillas. I thought the gorilla in my closet was an advance guard sent to kidnap me and take me to his universe.

If you’re worried about the electric bill which is perfectly reasonable we used lime lites when I became afraid of the dark. They offer a lot of light for their small size and are very energy efficient.

When you turn off the lights and they are alone there imagination explodes and all there fears comes into the room and then they become scared. That is why children become scared of the dark.

I remember the only time I was afraid of the dark was after my cousin took us to see “The Creature from the Black Lagoon”. We had to use a long path through the woods to get from the bus stop. Even my 14 year old cousin was scared although she pretended not to be.

I suspect part of the reason is that some children see videos and movies that they are not prepared enough to see. It is also sometimes a ploy for attention and to extend bed time. It also may be that when very young children are in the dark, they feel that their world disappears. Kids are very literal and if they can’t see something, it doesn’t exist.

I read this odd theory once, about how the fear of the dark is with us since our caveman days.
All the way back then, people were often attacked, killed and dragged off by nocturnal predators, and therefore, such incidents highly kicked up the survival instinct by being more aware of our surroundings. Imagination may owe its roots to just wanting to live.

The suddenly part you mention perhaps points to just that, starting to being aware of our environment as children. I suppose it was so traumatic that it remained all these centuries, and also caters to other modern events, such as abuse, angry pets or house fires. It has its uses.

If I’m totally off my rocker, then I suggest that the night, the dark and the silence greatly ’‘help’’ to imagine anything in more vivid ways.

If you don’t believe me, then try this…think about yourself being in the woods at night, and from between some trees, an old woman slowly walks out and asks you if you saw her grandson. It’s funny right now lol, but next time you’re actually in the woods at night, think about it again.

@Symbeline That’s really interesting actually thank you! It seems to make perfect sense to me! And the old lady in the woods…well that does just freak me out just thinking about it! x

Dear Nebule,

This topic may be a bit old but children will always be afraid of the dark so for current readers this might be helpful.
I hope your son has overcome his fears!
I used to be afraid too, I guess it started with the dark when I was around 3–4 but then mainly of what I used to see in the dark. A few years later not sure why but those memories started to come back and I got really stressed out all the time because I could not get rid of the images in my mind. With time in my teenage years I found a way to deal with those memories. At least so I thought at that time… I had to think of a series of situations, a pattern of thought that stopped my anxiety for some time but when the memories came back I had to do it over and over again. As I later found out by that time I have developed a case of OCD(obsessive compulsive disorder) and it only got worse and worse. Now I am 29 and I managed to get over the majority of my problems but it pretty much consumed my teenage years. The whole thing may have been avoided with a bit of help in the early years. Of course I would not have wanted to talk about it so it would not have been an easy job to help. So, anyone reading this do not underestimate your childs anxieties. Nowadays there is a lot of good advice that you can find on the internet. The advice I can give is: DON’T PANIC!

Thanks @justaguy my son is doing fine now with the dark :-) Sorry to hear that things didn’t so easily get sorted for you and hope you’re managing the OCD xx