What are the typical white lies husbands usually tell their wives and vice versa?

“I love you like the day we first met” (Always false, for better or for worse)

“Of course i like your present, honey” (Hint: if you have to ask, the answer is “no”. If it’s something you wanted, the answer is “go fuck yourself”)

“I never think about other women” (It’s hormones, what the fuck can we do about it?)

I did not sleep with your sister, and no your nephew is not my son.

@Thammuz I dunno about the first site one. There’ve been a couple girls in my life that just the SECOND I set eyes on them, I knew I was totally into them. Now where things went from there…. that is a different story.

“Of course he/she wasn’t flirting with me.”

How often they stop for drinks after work.
How much junk food they eat.
That looks don’t matter.
That size doesn’t matter.
How much they like your friends/family.

That woman I work with is completely unattractive. And what a bitch!

I’m pretty sure my hubby is lying when he says he likes my cooking.

@jenandcolin: The cooking! My bf used to tell me all the time how much he liked me spoiling him with meals until I read a text message he sent a friend telling them I’m a lousy cook. BUSTED!

“Wow honey, I can’t wait to eat your brussel sprout casserole!” and “No I would never have sex with your mom, even if I was drunk!” LOL

“I was just surfing the internet and that stuff came up when I clicked a link.”

@DerangedSpaceMonkey the second one is not a lie in my case, i assure you.

@Thammuz LOL. Are you serious? Either way that’s funny. Here’s some lurve.

“Everyone I work with knows how much I adore you…”

@DerangedSpaceMonkey You haven’t seen my GF’s mom…

@Thammuz I wasn’t saying it was funny because there isn’t a possibility of there being a hot mom out there. I’m just saying it was funny because it is so NOT PC. I love that! >:-)

@DerangedSpaceMonkey You must be new here ;-)

@Thammuz Well as a matter of fact I am pretty new here. How could you tell?

@Thammuz the fact you’re still surprised by the fact i’m not politically correct, plus you have a very low lurve score. But that aside it was supposed to be a joke

@Thammuz Cool. I’m glad to be a member of your fluther. I think part of the reason I have such a low lurve score (aside from being new) is that most of my views are abstract and sometimes (maybe usually) offensive.

@DerangedSpaceMonkey dude you’ve been here a week, what score did you expect? i’ve been here six months and i have barely eight times what you’ve earned so far. Also read up on how formatting works here, when you’re off topic you should whisper…

“I’m just popping to the shop” – then two pints later…...

@Thammuz I’m not saying I’m disappointed, I just think if I had more of a popular opinion I would get more lurve.