How do you really feel about family holidays?

I am not crazy about the holidays.I am looking for other ways to spend them.;)

No. My family is exhausting and it’s a relief when it’s all over. I look forward to Dec. 26th more than the holidays themselves.

If I could drink through this entire weekend, I would. I’m already stressed out about it and they haven’t even arrived yet.

My family all moved away so I am starting new family traditions. I normally have all the other orphaned neighbors over on Thanksgiving now and I invite all the Jewish relatives over for Christmas dinner and they love and come for my spiral ham!

Once I decided to choose my family (KatawaGrey always included, of course, she’s fun!), my holidays became much better. My relatives are people I don’t spend holidays with, my family are the people I like to be with.

@Cruiser : When I lived in Seattle I hosted many a “waifs and strays” holiday… they were fabulous!

I used to really enjoy them, back when there were hordes of people and I had no idea about the consequences of being raised the way I was. Now there are only immediate family—my parents, my siblings and one SO, and me and my spouse and my kids. No other guests. And I’m sitting there watching my parents to try to intervene if they should do something to my son like they did to me. We’ve already had to stop the kids from visiting them without us. They think they are doing the right thing, and have no idea how cruel it is.

I dislike too much closeness and too long a visit. I used to resort to alcohol. Now I don’t drink so I have to really limit my time with them.

@JilltheTooth We just had a really great couple move up from Texas that will be with us on Thanksgiving. I love hanging with people and friends on a holiday you otherwise wouldn’t get to see!

I would like the holidays better if I was with my Dad and his side of the family.

My family is so dysfunctional it’s not worth discussing. Thank goodness for my son. His family is my family. The rest of them….not much love! Overall, holidays suck!

LOTTA work! I enjoy it (in fact, I have all four of my grandkids over right now…WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!) but I’m also glad when it’s over.

Thank you all for answering! I feel a little less like a misfit for not fitting the Madison Ave. agenda now. Wish I could spend the time with the Fluther family… Oh, wait. I am!

@Dutchess I am pleased that at least one person does have fun with it. Perhaps the exception that proves the rule?

We’re supposed to be driving off to the Thanksgiving destination right now but the weather is horrible and part of the highway was closed due to rockslides… so here we sit, crowded together, hiding in separate corners licking our wounded feelings. Blargh.

Oh, I try to never drink during the holidays….only makes it worse!

@Blueroses Hang in there! This too shall pass. We can have a virtual holiday Fluther gathering.

You guys should come to my house. Only Katawagrey and I are related, the rest are convivial friends, and I bought some extra wine today for all you folks!

Blessings upon you all. And please pass that wine… no glass necessary, but I’ll take a straw :)

@JilltheTooth I would love to!

@JilltheTooth I would love to, also. Funny how I am more comfortable with friends than family.

I used to way over drink just to cope with my family. Now I drink half as much for twice the high! It’s lovely to do all this cleaning and cooking and have people appreciate it, instead of criticizing it. Same amount of work (more, actually) but now it’s done with joy. Oh dear, I’m getting sappy.

When I was growing up, my Dad’s 4 brothers and their families lived near us, along with my Mother’s sister and parents, so we had huge family gatherings all the time. I love family gatherings.

After I married, my husband’s family all moved nearby and we had gatherings which grew as children were added every holiday, and most weekends. I love family gatherings.

When my husband’s company transferred us 500 miles away, I missed the family so much. We could only afford to visit them two or three times a year. One year, the in laws rented a 5 bedroom condo on the beach at Lake Tahoe and we had the best family gathering ever!

Now, my family has grown here, and we get to have family gatherings again. I love family gatherings.

I love them as long as I spend them with the “family” I’ve gathered over the years rather than blood relatives.

Two of my sisters and my brother are all on the west coast and rarely visit. The rest of us are here in Illinois and live within an hour of each other, so the holidays are just a one day event for us. That’s just enough time to not get sick of each other. We have a good time.

We don’t often do a big family gathering but this is probably great-gram’s last holiday season so everybody is together this time. I don’t have a great connection with any of these people who are all smug and think they have the right to comment on everything about my life (mainly my single status). The saving grace is the group of 16-unders. I’m an adult, but I would much rather sit at the kid’s table – video games and Battleship are totally my speed. The youngs don’t judge so much.
Just put my wine in a sippy-cup and I will survive the week.

Because of some grievous losses, I find the holidays bittersweet. And mercifully, since my sister and I have large houses near each other, people come to us. No long drives, no marathon celebrating, some pleasant shared meals, long walks, silly old-fashioned word games, and frolicking with the animals.

No one drinks much any more; an occasional beer or a glass of wine.

And my sister’s son has almost completed his charming week-end house (also close-by).us. We are hoping that next year he’ll do the cooking. The next generation is slow to take the hint.

I fucking hate holidays. Since when do we need certain dates to remind us that family and friends are to be cherished? Shouldn’t that just go on all year round? It’s pathetic to see two aunts act like buds on one or two days when it’s common knowledge to all the neighbours that all they generally do is get on each others’ tits. Damn superficial holiday.
And I don’t find such times a mercy from strife, as it generally turns into a fest of drama and hostility once the peeps get bored of the novelty of not having to work, and then getting drunk too much. Not to mention that it’s all hailed by mass stress and the epitome of the rat race and sheep slaughter.
Still, I supposed that’s better than hearing some dude talking about regrouting his kitchen the whole time. Like people cared lol. Yeah man, your kitchen is fuckin awesome!

@Symbeline That’s it exactly. Hell, I didn’t even see you here, when did you come in? You come sit by me.

My Mom was all about Christmas and we did it up pretty well then. Now, my family is messed up (with injuries) and aren’t as close as we used be. So, we do our best and try to make the holidays enjoyable. I would say, though, that the last three Christmas’ didn’t feel like Christmas atall. That special feeling wasn’t there. To me, it was just like any other day.

This year, though, it’s different. I’m into it! I am heading to the Carolinas with my girlfriend and I get to celebrate it with them. They’re quite close and they remind me of my family a few years ago. Also, I’m bound and determined to make the best of this one when I’m home. I’m getting a tree, putting up some lights and going to be spreading some holiday cheer if it kills me.

@Blueroses – I feel your pain. Well, I have before. This year is a bit of a mystery. We’re going to his family’s house, this year. I feel a bit like a fish out of water, but we’re packing up the kids and going. In fact, we’re waiting for him to get home, he’s still working.

I think the way I used to think of the holidays has changed. I miss my dad. He’s no longer here. Probably why this year was easier to go out of town. My mother was very gracious and understood, she also understood how many holidays my husband has given up with his family. Either due to illness (me) or due to my father’s failing health and death. There is something strange about this time of the year. I can remember the happiness and laughter, but still am mending the loss I still feel from my dad’s passing.

Maybe it will be good to be away. Or, I’ll be on the front page of some newspaper because I’ve gone off the deep end!

I dread them. I also love Dec 26. That’s my holiday.