What are some stereotypes about men and women you've heard (or even grown up with) and what ones do you agree or disagree with?

Women are:
-Stupid
-Shallow
-Superficial
-Weak
-Asexual
-Only concerned with marriage and babies
-Inferior
-Helpless
-Better at domestic chores

Men are:
-Smart
-Wise
-Horny
-Deep
-Strong
-Providers
-Capable
-Superior
-Well-rounded
-Warriors

I agree with exactly none of them.

Women can’t drive – Agree
Women are less intelligent – Disagree
Men and women are equal – Disagree, no one’s equal to someone else.
Men are less emotional – Disagree
Men are disgusting – Agree

Pretty much all of them. The more I learn about other cultures, and more importantly, meet individuals that share their personalities, how can one accept stereotypes by gender?

Women are disgusting, or more accurately, their vaginas are. Men want to have sex with them, but the idea of going down on them or being visually attracted to them is repulsive.

-Women can’t drive (agree/disagree. Neither gender drives very well, but I don’t think it’s because of their gender).
-Women are emotional, men are stoic (bullshit)

I think it might be hunter/breeder related but I’ve noticed at least 90% of truly inept drivers I’ve seen were women.

@Zyx I agree with the generalization that women can’t drive. I can’t think of a woman in my life that doesn’t make me nervous when I allow her to drive me. And I would say I hang out with more women than men.

That woman are vain and men are not. Just wait until a man starts losing his hair and you will see real vanity then.

@Zyx @mrrich724 But are you looking at men to see if they’re bad drivers? I can find tons of criminals that are black, that doesn’t mean there aren’t also tons who are white.

Women should not make a fuss or complain or generally bring attention to themselves at all costs.

@papayalily I’m just looking at offensive vehicles I encounter on the road. Not even calculating in there are more men on the road then women.

I totally disagree that women, as a whole, are worse drivers. Most people suck all the way around at driving. However, insurance rates for young male driver males are higher than for young female drivers. Why is that?

@papayalily And yet, honestly, they do seem to do just that more than men….that is they “make a fuss or complain or generally bring attention to themselves….”

Women should smile at all times, for unlike men, they have no real problems.
Women should be subservient. Men should be dominant.
Women are whiny. Men are thoughtful.

@Dutchess_III I disagree. Especially when it comes to real issues – women are less likely to say “no” or ask for a raise or stand up for themselves because they don’t want to be perceived as rocking the boat.

@papayalily The only man who has ever scared me by being my driver is my grandpa. And that’s only recently, and I’m attributing it to the fact that he’s almost 80 years old.

But every other male driver has chauffeured me at a higher rate of speed, and more aggressively, but still maintained a greater sense of control that has given me the confidence to allow them to drive me again. I am a young man, but in my 25 years I can not think of one man that has scared me by their driving habits, and I can not think of one woman who hasn’t.

I’m sorry. I’m sure it sounds horrible, but it’s true to me.

And while others may disagree, I like to consider myself experienced enough in the nuances of what makes a great driver based on the fact that I spend alot of my free time driving and racing vehicles because I just love it. So I’d call myself an expert in a sense.

@mrrich724 Have they actually maintained a greater amount of control, or do you just perceive them to have that because they were men? Were they gripping the steering wheel harder or something? I can only come up with 2 people that don’t scare me as drivers; one’s a woman and one’s a man. One man – holy hell do I not want to ever let him drive me again, and part of it is because he thinks that because he’s a man, he’s invincible.

Men cannot be raped, for all sex (especially from women) is welcome and they would never say no; thus, giving them the opportunity to say no is pointless.

@papayalily My my! You were a kid on the playground in the 60’s too, weren’t you! However, to your last statment, I think women are less likely to hold their ground or ask for a raise because a) they’re afraid of violence if they hold their ground and b) they’re afraid of losing their job if they ask for a well-deserved raise that has been withheld for some asshole reason.

Damn, you jumped in before me @papayalily..wait @mrrich724!!! (Geez! This is worse than chat!) When I was younger I perceived men as “better” driver….as I became more experienced at driving, most everyone sucks.

…I just shut up now and listen….

@Dutchess_III No, I’m actually 24. I just have zero tolerance for sexist bullshit.

@papayalily I think that men and women are very different, and by nature have different skills. For example, I’m sure you are familiar with the generalization that women are better multitaskers, and men lack that ability. Again, a generalization, but one that seems to fortify itself with a plethora of examples in real life. But not ALWAYS applying to everyone. (which is what makes it a stereotype.

I’m not sure if men grip the steeringwheel harder, or whatever else. But it seems normal in my mind that just maybe, based on the different physicalities between a male and female, it’s possible due to better hand-eye coordination (just a wild guess at what it could be, not saying that’s the case) there is a physical difference allowing men to maintain control of a vehicle better.

And guess what, I’m sorry you have zero tolerance for sexist bullshit, but this is a question on the social section of fluther, and I am one of many people who posted an answer. Why sidetrack the OP’s answer with your opinions and issues with sexism? I’m sure if you read above, there are other generalizations about other issues too . . . it’s the nature of the question. So i’m sure you’ll survive.

@mrrich724 How am I… What? I’m allowed to disagree with you on social – I haven’t flagged any of them as unhelpful. Social encourages discussion of almost all posts – you would have more of a case in general. I’m not sidetracking anything – it’s a question about sexism and it asks my opinion of it. I also put my zero tolerance comment in whisper so as to note that I wasn’t trying to say that it was part of the original conversation, but rather was something of a sub-conversation. Of course I’ll survive; I never said I wouldn’t.

Women have better eye-hand coordination than men. Just sayin’. That’s what I heard. I mean, could a man put on mascara while driving? Er…could a woman read the Wall Street Journal while driving? Or…are both equally STUPED in that case.

Men are unreliable, fickle and selfish.
Women’s only trustworthy happiness will be in children.

I disagree with both.

OK…what about, the concept that if a woman decides for whatever reason (other than that’s the way she’s really feeling) to turn on the flirt…men go blank, become malleable. If the women in question is just playing him, other women watching can see it, the men can’t. ??

@Dutchess_III Don’t understand, please restate.

@Dutchess_III If women have better hand-eye coordination, than how come, since their inception,sports, videogames, and driving have been male dominated until recently? I thought it had something to do with hand-eye coordination. (This is a genuine question, not sarcasm) In fact, I have spent years in an industry that requires personal drivers for executives. I have met only one which was a woman. Another genuine question. . . why do you think that is the case?

In any case. I wasn’t trying to make that a statement (the hand eye coordination), just as an example of what could possibly be the case, just point out in general that there are mental and physical differences between men and women (and using that particular example as what COULD be the case)

@papayalily sorry for the whole “sidetracking the conversation” thing. To tell you the truth, I forgot the specifics of the question, and I forgot that it specifically addresses the differences between men and women. I was talking under the false assumption that this post was about generalizations in general, forgetting the specifics. So sorry, you didn’t sidetrack the conversation. I scrolled up and clarified with myself just now. Since I was confused, I thought you were taking a “generalization” post, and turning it into something only about men and women, which is what it was the whole time.

Well, I’ve found that I can ‘control’ a situation if I have to by…flirting (when a man’s response would be to punch.) I flirt (without meaning it for a damn moment) till he’s calmed down, thinking of something else other than violence, then excuse myself “for a moment” and get the hell out of Dodge.

@mrrich724 Sports: Because it’s far more interesting to watch men play physical games, like basketball and football, than it is to watch women play. It’s dominated by the amount of people who want to watch.

Videogames…You couldn’t beat me at Asteroids, or pool, or foosball. Games that don’t require sheer physical strength are becoming increasingly level-fielded. In my generation, women were more interested in flirting on the dance floor (probably due to societal expectations.) I wanted to play pool and foosball. Those types of sports aren’t dominated by one or the other. People are just more used to assuming that because men dominate in physical sports, they dominate in ALL sports.

You said “Driving”—I assume you mean racing. That’s changing, slowly but surely. A woman could never really compete on a football field, but a woman who WANTS to can dominate on a car race track because it takes coordination, decision making ability, and bravery, and doesn’t rely on physical strength almost exclusively. Why aren’t more women race car drivers? I’d say that’s due to societal constrictions.

As for sidetracking—It’s OK! It’s my thread! Carry on!

Some of the sexist stereotypes are bound to play themselves out because people are socialized into them and many have no problem being caricatures of their gender. I disagree with the concept, most especially, that women are naturally better parents than men or that the “hard wired” brain differences are due to innate differences in utero and to hormones, but don’t get me started.

Hey @Simone_De_Beauvoir! Knew you were there! OK. That’s all I have to say. Except…what about millions of years of evolution where the women had the babies, and…if the man who sired them wanted to leave, he did? Let’s look back, past the last two generations (40 years.) Look back to the last 100, 200, 1000, 2000, 10,000, 50,000, 1,000,000 years. Don’t you think that there might have been some genetic component that came about early on (in the 1,000,000 mark) that caused certain men to stay when they didn’t have to, and certain women to cause them to stay? And some genetic component that caused women to keep their offspring alive long enough to find a replacement if the man didn’t stay?

@Dutchess_III Please explain, specifically, what you mean when you use the term ‘genetic component’ and also how your last questions relate to gender differences.

Evolution. Genetic component. Genetic component is created/determined during evolution. The genetic components that make us human and not chickens was created during the millions and billions of years of evolution from the first living organism (billions of years ago.) The genetic component that makes a chicken a chicken today, and not a rooster. The one that causes chickens to lay eggs, and roosters to crow (but not chickens to crow) Not sure what you’re asking me to clarify…..genes, developed over millions of years. Genetic components. Like that.

I had a Sociology professor who believed that men’s brains are wired for details and tasks; women’s for problem solving and “big picture”. I’ve seen many examples of that in the years since.

One that stands out was the TV show Junkyard Wars where the all male teams would put together a vehicle, making disparate parts fit each other and paint the thing with skulls and flames before realizing the engine didn’t start. The teams with at least one woman were better at seeing the total effect of the details and didn’t end up scrambling at the end.

@Dutchess_III So you are discussing genes/DNA, ok. Genes instruct a fetus to develop a certain body. We categorize bodies into male and female (and that is a human development, that categorization). We then inform those bodies how to act by parenting and socialization. Because those bodies are developing including brains, there might be differences (‘uncovered’ by researchers who think they are being objective but aren’t) between genders (VERY culturally constrained and time bound) due to life long socialization and brain differentiation, so to speak, based on what is encouraged in boys and girls. Anyway, this we know – I still don’t get how all that relates to whether women pick men who don’t stray over men who do – obviously men and women both stray and often, regardless of marriage or other societal impositions of relations.

K. Not all men, and not all women, stray “often.” I realize that in your world they do, and it’s not considered straying…......but what if if JP were to find someone in all of his open adventuring, and flat left you for this one, amazing person, who is retarded in what she considers a committed “relationship”, and demanded exclusivity, what would you do? What would the boys do?

@Dutchess_III Not that we need to make this personal but clearly you need to get these thoughts off your chest..
Right and some men and women don’t stray – I still don’t get what this has to do with genetic material. As to the men and women who do stray, they’re not in ‘my world’, they’re in our world. Now, if JP is to find someone who he believes is a better partner for him than me, he should be with that person. This random person who’s so amazing (and really, more amazing than me? C’mon, :)) would never force him into a committed relationship without his consent and about a million conversations that would include some kind of insanity on his part because he’d never go for anyone (nor would I) who would demand such a thing from him – if he would be with her, he’d be with her and not with me and we’d figure out the children just like I figured out my child when I left my ex-husband. And by the by, this scenario of yours is just as likely (and I believe more likely) to happen in a committed relationship so I don’t see the point of you bringing it up, to begin with.

Yes, you figured out what to do with Alexy, but it involved (a)nother man….right?

@Dutchess_III Right. So? sorry, everyone..guess it’s ‘let’s ask Simone private questions’ time

Nothing more to say. Men make it without women, easily. Woman have the kids….and many make it alone (with the kids,) but not easily. Happens all the time. I guess I have to ask—What ever happened to the societal prescription where men were pressured to take care of their kids after they left, whether a court ordered them to or not? What happened to the stereotype that men had to pay all this money for kids they don’t ever get (read “don’t try) to see?

@Dutchess_III Oooooh, are you trying to say that men can leave a relationship unattached to kids and a woman can’t and that’s somehow hard-wired through evolution? Two people have ‘the kid’ in my opinion and it’s societally imposed that men can leave and women can’t. Obviously, I don’t believe men should be able to leave kids behind any more than I think women should have to be the ones to take care of kids. PS: I can make it on my own, I didn’t need Alex for that (to raise my kid), I needed him for me.

I’m reading a book called Choke by Sian Beilock right now and it’s about the tendency some people have to let their nerves get the better of them in high-stakes situations and what can be done to prevent that. Anyway, the reason it’s relevant is that psychologists have found that one of the things that causes people to get nervous is what they call “stereotype threats.” This is when, while you’re performing a task, you’re aware of a negative stereotype about a group of which you’re a member in relation to that task. Like say you’re a female driver. And merely being aware of that stereotype is, in some cases, enough pressure to cause you to perform badly if you’re somebody who tends to perform badly under pressure.

To test this, experimenters gave a math test to two groups of people. The control group simply took the test. But before giving the test to the experimental group, they offhandedly mentioned something about women doing poorly on this test previously. In the control group, men and women performed about equally. In the experimental group, women performed significantly worse than men. The conclusion they draw is that the women in the experimental groups were using up valuable brain power that could have been used on the test either feeling defeated or thinking “I’ll show these motherfuckers that women can do math.” Basically, reminding women of the stereotype that women can’t do math actually makes them do worse at math, which then perpetuates the stereotype. These things are self-fulfilling prophesies.

It seems that more men can leave a relationship and eventually become unattached to the kids than women. I think if women were the ones to leave, they’d eventually become unattached to the kids too. But it’s usually the men who leave and eventually become unattached.

@Mariah I can see that. Me…it would piss me off! And I like math and I’d blow it out of the water just to show them! And succeed….or…fail, because I tried too hard. Men would do the same. I think that’s a human trait.

Hey @roundsquare~

I always find these conversations amusing.

One side says that the differences between men and women in activity X (that doesn’t require sheer strength or giving birth) are a result of cultural influences.

One said says that there are genetic/biological differences between the two genders.

As far as I can tell, its both. As cultural barriers to women entering “men’s fields” fall away we see women entering the fields and being successful. But this doesn’t prove that women are equal to men in that field. Maybe they are better, maybe they are worse (on average of course).

Hey @Dutchess_III

This has nothing to do with the recent entering of women into “men’s field’s” simply because traditional “men’s fields” require intelligence and savvy which it has long been assumed women had neither of. That’s being proven wrong at the speed of light (if you do the math, A=America then A1970^1,000,000, it works out to about that.) I still say the bitch is….the average woman is NOT as physically strong or physically built like the average men. And….that seems to be hard to deal with for some reason.

Hey @roundsquare : )

Yeah…what you said, @roundsquare. I just re-read it….

@roundsquare I say it’s both. I’m just saying we shouldn’t be so sure how much of each matters and which one matters more.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir Truth be told.

Whoops, I should answer the original question.

Women are more emotional—> hard to say. It might be true, but men are not expected to show emotion.
Men are physically stronger—> I tend to believe this one on average.
Women are more compassionate —> If I think about it this seems true in my life but the tendency is pretty weak.
Men are better at math—> Very hard to break out cultural impact form biology, but I know brilliant (I mean truly brilliant world class) mathematicians of both genders.
Women care more about having a clean house —> Again true in my life, but this comes mostly from women of my mother’s generation where this was ingrained into them.
Men can be easily tempted into anything with sex —> Might be true… we’re pretty dumb that way (though I suppose this fluctuates with age).
Women are better at multi-tasking —> I’m not sure about what I’ve seen in my life, but the evolutionary argument seems to make sense. Women who could multi-task would have a better chance of successfully taking care of their kids and this would pass on. For men, this might have been detrimental in hunting which is dangerous enough to require your entire focus.

Oh yeah, on driving. In my experience there is a dichotomy between what it means to be a good driver:
> Women tend to be more careful. In normal, safe situations they are better drivers. They don’t cause problems.
> Men tend to be more aggressive and, as a result, learn how to “handle” their car better. So, when the shit hits the fan, men react better.
This could be complete BS though.

Girls outperform boys in school. I agree. It’s not a stereotype. It’s a fact. We just have to look at the numbers. The amazing thing: it’s true in practically every country. Even in countries (allegedly) favoring boys. Recently I ran across the following statistic

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Education_in_Kuwait#Intermediate_and_secondary_education

In Kuwait girls outperform boys in every subject of the 12th grade examinations, particularly in philosophy, English, Arabic languages, chemistry, physics, mathematics and biology.

But why is this so? Prenatal hormones? Puberty hormone changes? Societal norms?

@mattbrowne I am inclined to think it has less to do with biology because just a couple of decades ago, research around this issue was showing the opposite trend – evolutionarily speaking, no biological shifts could have occurred that quickly to make a difference.

@mattbrowne I would think it’s because girls feel the need to showcase their talents more than boys do and prove that their gender isn’t holding them back. If a girl fails, it’s because she’s a girl. If a boy fails, it’s his failure alone, not the failure of his gender.

But what change in societal norms explains this opposite trend? Decades ago girls had to prove even more that their gender isn’t holding them back.

@mattbrowne Depending on how many decades ago, girls didn’t have to prove much.

I think girls focus and concentrate more than the boys, and they make more random connections. Boys tend to get easily distracted. That’s what I see in the class room, anyway. Could be societal expectations, could be biology.

@Dutchess_III I think many teachers view boys and girls differently and simply don’t discipline the boys as much or expect them to be distracted or say ‘boys will be boys’ and ‘aren’t those girls nice sitting all calm? – In Russia, in the Communist times, all kids sat exactly the same way, there was no differentiation..clearly, if that was socialized, so is the situation here in the U.S.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir When you say there was no differentiation (in Russia) are you saying the test scores were the same for the boys as well as the girls?

And yes…it could be social expectations, too, although in my experience the boys are disciplined far more often than the girls.

@Dutchess_III Don’t know about scores, talking about the way we behaved, we were all expected to and therefore did behave the same.

1. Men are smarter than women. False.
2. Girls are doing better than boys in school because girls are really smarter? False.
3. Boys are doing worst in school because there is social pressure put on them from their peers that getting good grades isn’t cool or masculine. True. (going by my own experiences here)
4. Men are “hunters”. False.
5. Men should be the ones who pursue women for relationships, not the other way around. False.
6. Men are better drivers than women. False. (definitely going by personal experiences here)
7. Men are (for the most part) physically stronger than women. True.
8. Men aren’t as emotional as women. False.
9. Men hide openly showing emotions. True.
10. Women enjoy compliments more than men. False.
11. Women need to feel more wanted/needed than men. False.
12. Each gender is likely to have a structered mindset based on cognitive dissonance that forms from social constructs based upon gender. True.

@mattbrowne Using engineering as an example…

Even as it opened up to women, it didn’t open up completely. Women were still given a hard in the field. Only the best of the best could get past all the social difficulties. Naturally, this would mean that your average female engineer is better than your average male engineer. More women means more female role models means more women, etc… But we’re nowhere near equality on this, so for the time being, the women average better. (This is based on my experience speaking with women I was in college with).

Of course, its possible that women, on average, make better engineers, but we don’t know yet.

I remember in Jr. High taking an aptitude test. I assumed I would score highest in lit and in social areas. However, to my surprise, my highest score was in engineering/mechanics…...no one ever commented on it. I wondered why they even gave them to us.

@Dutchess_III Probably for school funding.

@roundsquare I’m trying to figure out how that would work. I can understand that the funding is provided based on number of students in the school, the number of special ed kids, and the socio-economic class of the students….but how would aptitude affect it?

@Dutchess_III It could work one of two ways.
1) The schools where students are doing worse need more money for better teachers.
2) We want to create incentives for schools so the ones that do better get more money.

I wish it was always #2, but it’s not.

@roundsquare – I see your point.

@Dutchess_III Why? Schools in poor areas can’t always get enough money to attract good teaches. This stunts/prevents/reverses any positive impact the school might have on the community.

In any event, there is an argument against basing funding on performance because you are punishing students for the failure of the teachers. I don’t have a solution to this problem but its always bugged me that bad teachers—> less money—> bad teachers —> etc…

@roundsquare There are good teachers and there are bad teachers and it doesn’t depend on the amount of money they’re paid. Teacher’s don’t get merit raises. Their salary increases solely on how many years they’ve been teaching + the amount of education they have, nothing more. Throughout every student’s life they’re going to get a mix of good teachers, great teachers and bad teachers. That’s life. However, the student’s performance will remain roughly the same throughout all of those years because their level of academic ability depends more on the student’s intelligence level, their work ethic and how seriously they take school. And the last two, ethics and seriousness, depend a great deal on the parents and the values and level of self-responsibility they place upon their kids—what they expect from their kids. And that has nothing to do with how much money the parents make or a school district has. Whether you realize it or not, you’re doing what people have been doing for the last 20 years….telling the kids it’s not their fault. It’s the teacher’s fault. And the students are entering into the system with that “understanding.” And it’s been over the last 20 years that we’ve seen the results falling.

Gadzooks, myths about women:
• They don’t like sex (disagree)
• They can’t grill (disagree)
• They nag too much (agree)
• They are poor drivers (jury is still out)
• They fall apart after 30 looks wise. (disagree about 25%
• Women go for personality more than looks. (BIG disagreement)
• Women are not shallow) (BIG disagreement)
• Women are not as shallow as men (Big BIG disagreement)

Men myths:
• They can’t change a diaper correctly. (disagree)
• They can’t cook. (disagree most famous chef are men)
• Men can’t sew (disagree 30%)
• Hall men are handy with tools. (disagree)
• Men know everything about boinking. (disagree)
• Men have brown thumbs, they can’t grow houseplants. (Jury is still out)
• All guys go crazy over big boobed blondes. (are you kidding me? BIG disagreement)
• Real men like beer and whisky. (disagree)

Those are some of the more glaring ones I remember.

@Dutchess_III Not fair you stole my question.

@Paradox I sorry!