What did you think love would be like before you ever found it?

I guess i was just blessed beyond belief. for me, love was everything i expected it to be and much more. it was love at first sight for my wife and i. we have become one person throughout the years. actually, its been this way since day one. we know what each other is thinking and that can be a good or bad thing. anyway, we have used our personalties to our advantage. we have so many things in common, that its mind-boggling. as children, we unknowingly played in the dirt together. we only discovered this, after five years into our marriage. so, as you can see, our marriage was just meant to be. we have 45 years together and each day is a different day to fill with our own imagination of what tomorrow will be for us. its always been “us against the world”. and, it will always be this way. we have been blessed and we know it. i only wish others could find that special someone for them for the rest of their lives.

I guess I thought it would be a lot like those twilight movies are…..thankfully its not, or even I would have been annoyed by me…

Every time I have been in love, it has been different. With my current boyfriend, it is like waking up on a Saturday morning and knowing that a wonderful day is ahead of you but for right now, you can just lay in bed where it’s warm and nothing has gone wrong yet!

For my first kiss, I was honestly expecting something big and spectacular unrelated to the kiss to happen. I was more surprised that there was nothing but saliva and our bewildered expressions.

Every time I thought I found love it turned out to be a big disappointment… like finding out that Santa wasn’t real.

Then I realized that love isn’t, and cannot be found anywhere.

Love is made, not found. And the love I make always turns out to be exactly the way I make it.

When I was younger, love was a rather vague concept relating to happiness and sex. Over the years, I discovered that sex had less to do with it than I thought, and happiness could be elusive. I became rather cynical about love. Then I met the woman who was to become my second wife. We became friends, then best friends, and then decided we loved each other. My relationship with her opened up an entirely new concept of love in my mind and heart, combining the best aspects of deep friendship with the affection and trust of deep love. I am happier than I’ve ever been in my life. : ))

I believed that love was magical, and binding, that nothing could break its bond. However, i forgot to consider how people can fall out of love just the same as they fell in it. I thought that if you loved someone, minor and superficial things could not get in the way of a relationship. I knew that love was something you didn’t give up on just because things were hard to deal with. Now I truly know that love is blinding and does not compensate for mistakes and incompatibility.

Love is the feeling but compatibility is the link.

@KatawaGrey, the love you describe is exactly what I want to find, but find hard to believe is out there.

It was slightly disappointing once I realized that I would have to settle down for love. I haven’t met anyone I could love with similar or parallel goals and everyone that I thought I could love would force me to compromise and make me settle down at some point in life. My biggest problem is I can’t settle, I have to have some sort of unattainable goal to constantly strive for. I tried settling and it nearly drove me insane (which I may already be just a tad) and to suicide. I guess that’s one issue with being an existential nihilist, if I run out of things to do, then everything truly does become completely pointless and purposeless, whereas with unattainable goals I can amuse myself as to seeing how close I can come to it.

When you first fall in love, it’s all tingly and amazing. But we went into it understanding that love is a commitment. The tingly rush might leave, but the commitment over time will make it strong and deep. There is a wonderful sense of security in knowing that although we cannot dictate what life will throw at us, we will always have each other. There are things we’d both like to change, but nothing is worth arguing about. We love each other until death do us part.

I’ve had a few different loves, at different stages of my life. Before I experienced it the first time, I hadn’t given it much thought at all, really. I don’t think I ever expected to feel it… I kind of thought I was broken, and incapable of that kind of love. I’d dated plenty of guys who claimed to love me, and had never felt it in return. In fact, it was a pretty sure bet that once a guy told me he loved me, I’d break up with him soon after. So, it actually came as a bit of a shock the first time! Looking back, it’s easy to see that what I thought was love that very first time, was a mere shadow of the real thing. Puppy love or infatuation, maybe.

The first ‘real’ love I felt was a different animal entirely. A sick, sick animal, truth be told. I fell in love with a bad guy, and threw everything I had into it. Very unhealthy… I think if he’d asked me to kill myself to prove my love for him, I would have. Thank God he dumped me, and I eventually saw it for what it was. Leaving me open to the next stage: Mature love.

Marriage: A man I loved, by choice, I think. He didn’t sweep me off my feet, but he was a good guy, and we genuinely loved one another. We had three great kids together, and we were a good team for a long time. Until we weren’t anymore. After 20 years together, 17 of them married, we divorced on remarkably good terms. Next up: All of the above, wrapped into one.

Vowing to never have a serious relationship again, I went on a date for fun. He, too, had sworn off love. Though we wouldn’t admit it for many months, we fell in love while talking quietly in the dark that very first night. We just clicked in a way neither of us had ever experienced before. It was terrifying! And exhilarating. Did I mention terrifying? After months of denial, and turning down 5 or so marriage proposals, I finally admitted I was a goner and married him. :)

Anyway, here’s what this love is like: Great passion and great affection. Mutual respect and care. Being perfect for each other, just the way we are. Feeling like there is no better place on earth than our couch… me laying with my head on his lap, his arm curled around me. Feeling safe for the first time in my life. Crying at the beauty and wonder of it all. Content that he’s sleeping upstairs as I type this. It’s the best of all of the loves I’ve had in the past: Smitten puppy love, full-bore hard core love, mature love that makes sense… combined with the wisdom to handle it all. I’m one lucky chick. :D

When I was a kid then I didn’t believe in love. I thought people who got married were foolish, their lives mundane and mostly disappointing from my perspective. I resigned never to marry, never to get trapped with children, etc. I wasn’t afraid love would weaken me or make me a slave but I thought it blinded people and made fools of them.

Just like @john65pennington I do feel blessed. I’ve only ever been in love once, and he’s sitting across from me now chuckling away at the Family Guy “Blue Harvest” thats on tv, while i type this. He has some grey in his beautiful blonde hair now, but boy do those dazzling blue eyes still kill me when he looks at me. Even after all these years he makes my heart speed up just by looking up from his paper and smiling at me. We finish each others sentences all the time (which makes us laugh and isn’t anywhere near as annoying as it sounds lol), and I love that he can walk into a room and know what kind of day I’ve had or if I just need a hug without my telling him.

When I was younger I used to think love was all chocolate box pictures, roses and church bells, then I grew up met my “other half” and found out it was soooooooooo much more than that, waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more and again like @john65pennington I wish everybody could have it.
hugs honeys xx

@augustlan

Isn’t it wonderful? : ))