@Dutchess_III
I see.
Well…try to remember the mantra of ’ when we know better we do better.’
You must come to beleive that you did as much as you were capable of while your mother was alive. I think maybe talking to someone might help if this has been a longterm thing that you feel is coloring your present moments.
I went through a divorce and lost my mother and uncle within a few years of each other back around 2002. It was a rocky road for a few years but it forced me, through my suffering to have some major awakenings. Hang in there!
@misstrikcy
Death is not personal, it just is.
This doesn’t mean there is not sadness, but people do not die to cause ‘personal’ greif for their loved ones.
The ‘identity’ we die with is a story, a construct, a belief system.
Animals do not die with an ‘identity’, we GIVE and assign an identity to things which personalizes them far beyond reality.
A goldfish just is, an expression of life, the ONE life…it is only when we name the goldfish ‘John’, give him a birth certificate and assign an identity to ’ John’ the goldfish do we suffer when John dies.
I am coming from an expanded way of thinking here, how can anything be ‘personal’.
Most of our pain is self created in somehow clinging to the false beliefs that we should, somehow not experience universal pain.
Pain happens, suffering is optional.
Suffering is born from what we tell ourselves about a situation, not so much the situation itself.