When you have to go to several places to "have Christmas" is there only one place that really seems to count?

It used to be my mom’s house.Now that she is gone,we all wander about aimlessly ;)

Part of what makes me uncomfortable is the message that it sends the little kids….that it’s all about the “things” they go here and there to get, and not about the family and the people. I could be wrong though…..

Within my family we tend to hold small parties before Christmas where we exchange gifts.
On Christmas morning we all open our gifts at our own houses, and then (as mum and dad) we invite the children over to our home, where we have Christmas dinner together.
It was the same for me when I was young. Perhaps I am following tradition.

I agree with @Dutchess_III – they used to make kids interested in piggy banks and saving money. Now they make Barbie dolls that come with there own cash register and make the sound of a till opening every time you swype the fake credit card :| The ratio of savings in the USA is now 0%... we spend more then we make.

@partyparty Don’t you ever run into conflict with the families of their SO’s?

It’s the place we have dinner. We had multiple Christmas’ growing up with a large extended family. Now we’re down to fewer of us spread over a small area. We all have our individual Christmas’, but the one that means the most is the one were we get together and have a good meal. That’s my Christmas highlight, not the presents.

Christmas is our house. The other places that we go to exchange gifts are warm visitations. (That is what I would put the emphasis on @Dutchess_III, a chance to share the holidays with friends and family and not the gifts.)

@Dutchess_III No I never have any conflict, because the families of their SO’s have their party in the New Year, and we all go there.
An amicable arrangement all round. I know I am fortunate.

@partyparty Very, very nice! As it should be!
@marinelife I agree…I just have a hard time getting everyone together at the same time. Two of the kids have to work Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, another kid (my teenage grandson) is moving to Seattle on Thursday, another one is going with his father whose wife would never allow the warm family sharing that @partyparty enjoys, another chooses her boyfriend over family….it’s just a cluster and I am not happy.

As a child, we would open presents early in the morning at our house, then go over to my grandparent’s for more presents/breakfast. Then we would go to my uncle’s for presents/dinner. Sometime during early January, the other side of the family would come down and we’d have a small Christmas with them.
The presents with the relatives were always small things, and it was emphasized that it was more about spending time with the family than anything else. So, it never really bothered me, because it meant that all the fun of Christmas was spread out over the day.

I never had to race around to different houses to celebrate the holidays. I think it sounds just awful when it becomes a chore to make others happy. But, I can see why people do it. If it is what the person, couple, or family want to do; want to go to his parents for dinner and her parents for breakfast, then fine, but like I said if it becomes a chore to make others happy, kind of ruins the enjoyment of the day I would think.

Christmas is not a day for rushing around. That would spoil it entirely for me. I sometimes have Christmas in my own home and sometimes with various relatives but wherever I am, apart from a walk I stay put.

No, all the places we go seem to matter an equal amount for different reasons. I guess that’s why we put up with the stress of being stretched so darn thin over two whole, endless days.

Home. I always look forward to being back in my flat with my dogs.

Growing up, we would usually spend actual Christmas day at home. Since my extended family all lived 8 hours away by boat and car, we would usually spend a couple days home before going to visit the grandparents. Luckily they all lived in the same general area (no more than 1.5 hours drive between them) so we could spend one day at Grammy’s, one day with my mom’s sister, one day with Grandma and Grandpa, etc. After my grandparents died (all in the same year, that was rough) we tended to stay home for Christmas. That was the main place that “counted” and it was kind of a relief not having to make the scramble all over the place to visit relatives.

Now my sister has a 1 year old baby, but she, baby and daddy all come to my parents house. Brother in law’s family is both estranged and Muslim, so we don’t have conflicts there. Although it’s sad my niece can’t see her other grandparents, it’s nice to have the whole family together in one place.

Like you, our family has always been “it”. We lived so far from extended relatives, most of them not very emotionally close so we got used to our house being the spot to kick back in and have other people stop in to visit.

This is a new era for me though because my SO has kids that don’t live with us and his parents live close enough to have gotten into a routine of splitting holiday times. Add in our family pod… wow. Fun but there will be no more sleeping in days or wearing PJ’s around the house all day.

Well, now that I’m the Grandma, it seems to be at my house. It’s funny the way it’s all worked out. My son, his wife, two sons, mother in law, and grandmother in law, my two adult grandsons, all gather here for a meal and presents. I have instituted the “unopened present” to represent the loved ones who couldn’t join with us this year.