If you could..would you be Santa?

I couldn’t do it; I have issues with OPKs.

I think it could be fun to put in an appearance as Santa in a parade but not so much sitting in a mall for hours on end. Outdoors and being able to move around would seem less restricting and more enjoyable for me personally. The best part would be just having the opportunity to do it in the first place since Christmas is my number one favorite holiday of the year.

@WillWorkForChocolate. What are OPK’s?

I would not, could not, be Mrs. Claus
I would not, could not, until the snow thaws

Not in a mall
Not in Nepal.

Nope.

No way.
However, I have played Santa within my own home for the last 7 years or so. ;) That’s fun.

Oh good Lord, no! With my anxiety, nope. Some kid would suffer my meltdown and I could never be the Santa that ruined Christmas.

@Jude – Very good! :)

@Bluefreedom—Other people’s kids?? Trying to figure that one out, too!

@Bluefreedom OPKs are Other People’s Kids. LOL

If, hypothetically, I was to be the mythical Santa—and not just some fake Santa—with magical powers and all, I don’t think I could keep up. Do we even know what he does the rest of the year? I mean, I know the elves build the toys and what not, but what does he do? Supervise? The whole year? Yeah, I don’t think so; nor do I want to find out.

So, no.

I have done it many times since I was 17. It can be nerve wracking at first but it turns out to be a massive head rush each time. My times were all at parties for friends, relatives and neighbors! I love messing with people I don’t know the best! Ho HO HO!!!

No, I could not bring myself to peep on everyone, some people’s junk just doesn’t sit well with me.

Yeah, I think being Satan would be pretty cool.

@Winters somehow the idea of you having issues with “other people’s junk” struck me as very funny!

I’d enjoy being the real Santa. Work one night a year, have a stable of mostly cooperative slave labor, spy on people and live off the blackmail proceeds in the Bahamas for the majority of the time. What’s not to like here?

I would be Bad Santa. :)

I always figured that if I was a dude, I’d be some fat guy with a ZZTop beard. For now I’ll say no though.

Yes, but only the real one – not the garden store variety.

I once figured out that if Santa were to spend a second at every house in the world, somehow manifesting presents in each one, and doing it all over the course of 24 hours, then he would need a sleigh that traveled faster than the speed of light. His sleigh would have to contain some wormhole into a large space where all the toys were waiting to be deployed into each home. He’s also need to have the technology to manifest toys into apartments and other domiciles with no fire place.

Now is that a lot of way cool technology or what?

But no. I’m not an early adopter. I’ll let someone else test out the Santa tech.

Are you kidding? Everybody loves me. I get to live forever, work one day a year, and cum down everybody’s chimney? What’s not to love in a life like that?

@ETpro you stay away from my “chimney.” I don’t need anything cumming down that.

@Winters: add my chimney to the list. That’s all kinds of wrong!

@Winters & @cak Aw! All those hot chimneys going to waste.

I’d really want to, but I’m terrible with children. I’d probably just make them cry…

a Fat Man… White Beard… NO!