Why is it kind of a taboo in for young people to have friends a few years younger than themselves?

I think that it has to do with maturity. Why would a seventeen year old want to be around a 13 year old? Sure, they’re probably great people, and I have friends that are in my brother’s age range (around 14–17 and I just turned 19), but it has to do with maturity. When you’re older, I think that it goes away more. For example, a 30 year old wouldn’t care if her friend was 25 or 40, I don’t think. With teenagers, it has to do with age and maturity.

There is a big difference between a 13 year old and a 17 year old. If they live near each other and hang out as a neighborhood thing, it might not be very odd. Watch TV, or grab some food after school if they live near each other. But, pretty much they have little in common. I would worry about the 13 year old if it was my 13 year old, that she is around stuff she is not quite ready for.

When you’re very young, those few years are like decades in maturity and general development to the rest of us.

When I was 17, I had friends that young. Usually they were kids from the street I grew up on. I had plenty of friends my age, but I didn’t discriminate.

I can’t imagine my 17-year-old self being friends with my 13-year-old self; they were essentially different people. I was like, completely prepubescent and innocent at 13. :P 17 was another story…

As the others have said, in that age range, there is rapid growth and development and the difference in a few years can seem like little, but realistically there are probably many differences. I still don’t think there’s anything wrong with it. I definitely had and still have some older friends and I’ve found them nothing but helpful and fun to be around.

I’m 14. I play with my sister, who’s 10, and her friends. Up until this fall, no matter where I was, I was always an outsider and nobody really included me in anything. They would talk about sleepovers and stuff they had done together, or were planning for, right in front of me. It would make me really uncomfortable and I’d go cry in the bathroom. I could be a bit sensitive and I didn’t have that many friends. When I was away from home, I’d always be bored watching other people have fun and I wasn’t. But I realized something – younger kids don’t care!! They don’t care if you’re weird, or talk a lot, or cry a bit more than normal. They’re just overjoyed that you, a “big kid”, are noticing they exist! I got teased a bit about hanging out with and having younger kids for my friends, but I was fine with it. I was already getting ignored. Now that I’m older and have figured life out a bit more, I’m more popular and more liked. I still pay attention to kids younger than me. They’re my friends! They know I’m someone they can ask for help about a kid that’s teasing them, or something else. The girls at church like to play stuffed animals with me. Now, people notice that I play with the younger girls and like it. I’ve got quite a reputation. Sometimes it’s a bit overwhelming, knowing that these girls look up to me.

So, for me, I’m kind of in a different situation, but it’s not that bad for me. People tend to generalize and assume – if you’re spending much time with people significantly younger than you, you’re only as mature as they are. Rather stupid, imo. Having older friends makes you more well-rounded.

Honestly I think it has a lot to do with development.

People change a great deal when they are younger. The difference between a 10 year old and a 15 year old is staggering. It’s a time when your growing physically and mentally at a very fast pace. And really what matters is the mental aspect, or more specifically how you interact socially with other people.

Think about it… when your 10 you probably aren’t interested in the opposite sex, your still very emotionally attached to your parents. Intellectually you’re not going to have the same interests or carry on conversations together very well with someone who is starting to rebel against their parents, are interested in the opposite sex and might be starting puberty.

After you hit 20 things do slow down a bit… even more so at twenty five. You’re not developing as much, plain and simple. Socially a 25 year old is not very different than a 30 year old. (At 27 I have more difficulty relating to 19 year olds than I do 35 year olds).

Now siblings are an entirely different issue, you’re relationship with them is going to be very different than with a friend.

I’m not saying there aren’t exceptions as well… but generally that’s why you probably wont have friends that are further apart in age when your younger.

Kids have few things to use for status so they use age.

It’s not “cool” for kids to hang out with younger kids.

When I was in high school, all the punk rock kids hung out together, regardless of age or what school they went to. We all went to the same shows and loved the same music – the scene was like a family and it was awesome. We were kind of the outcasts anyway, so we didn’t care about what was and wasn’t “cool”.