How often do you find yourself being used as a sounding board by friends or family?

Doesn’t happen to me much. I’m pretty disconnected from my family…. an ocean away.

You don’t HAVE to talk to them. Tell them you’re busy. They probably have no idea they are being a bother because I’m guessing you’ve never told them.

I’ve seen this happen to my husband though. An unemployed friend or his retired parents will call him and chat about nothing at all, right when we’re trying to have a family dinner or get out the door to run errands. He often has to say several times he’s busy and say good bye before his father gets the message (not really a fair comparison because his father is suffering from dementia…)

You have a button to push to hang up. The more you entertain their calls, the more they’ll do it. Don’t give them your time. Tell them you’re busy, can’t talk and hang up.

i ditched my family when i was old enough, actually more than old enough to fend for myself, this is what most mammals do, who am i to argue with nature.

Every day, more often it’s my boss…... :-/

Frequently

No, because I don’t allow that kind of venting.

A lot. I don’t have anyone I can really vent to, though.

Used to be all of the time. Lately it has tapered off. There is a gender difference that has been observed. Women tend to need to vent these type of things more than men. So, assuming women have more female friends, they are more likely to be sounding boards themselves. It is a part of bonding with women I think.

Well, for me it’s part of being Mom.

Pretty much all the time. In fact, I’m often a sounding board for complete strangers. Apparently, I’m very easy to talk to in person (a person who I do not even know once told me that after a “conversation” in which I did not say a word).

Letting people just get things out is sometimes the greatest help you can give them. It relieves stress and sometimes even helps them work things out for themselves—which has the added bonus of not leading to being asked for advice.

Oh, well, also, as a teacher I’m often lending an ear to students with troubles. Had one girl completely break down on me the other day. I felt soooooo bad for her.

@Dutchess_III I’ve not had a student break down on me yet, but I’ve been warned that the class I’m teaching this semester is prone to such incidents.

I find my family is pretty self sufficient and doesnt vent like that. We either figure stuff out on our own or simply approach it based on what we need to do. I have been involved with people and families in the past that seems like it is all they do. OMG what a waste of time and energy. It can suck the life right out of you.
When I am around it, I try to avoid the long winded drama of it. I would find other things to do that were productive. Don’t get me wrong, if it was something they needed help or advise on, thats different, but I would always turn it around to them to have them figure it out and make their own plan and decision.

Rarely from my family.They take care of business.If they do mention something,they usually put a funny spin on it.
:)

I’m a sounding board for my wife. Maybe a couple of friends, but that’s more of a mutual thing, so I don’t know if it counts.

I’m a sounding board for many people. I had periods in my life when I’ve desperately needed to talk to someone but didn’t really have anyone to talk to. I kidded myself and thought that I could just handle it on my own but, really, I couldn’t nor shouldn’t have. What this did do for me was create an understanding that, sometimes, you need a shoulder to cry on or a sounding board.

It can get overwhelming sometimes being that person but I hope, in some small way, I am helping.

That being said, I have no time for chronic complainers.

I have one friend that tends towards creating an epic work out of the most minor life situations. Infact, she called this morning in an uproar about having to revise her phone plan and how her provider made a costly mistake on her account.

I am not a complainer and I don’t create novels out of the mundane, I listened for a couple of minutes then just cut it off with saying ’ well, managing and staying on top of your stuff is just part of everyday life.’ lol

Cracks me up how some people can make such a BFD out of the simplest of things.

My mantra, don’t sweat the small stuff.

more than I would like. I find out things about my family I would rather not know when they run some of this stuff by me….sigh…but I love them all, so I should be honored, I guess.

They pretty much by-pass me in favor of Hubby.

@Coloma-“Cracks me up how some people can make such a BFD out of the simplest of thing”
Yep. ;)

I often find that when people are making a big deal out of a little thing, it’s not really what they are upset about. There is usually some underlying bigger issue, slightly related to their topic, that is really the thing that is bothering them.

@cazzie
Good point, that is true a lot of the time.

It used to feel like a full time job. Glad I’ve nipped that crap in the bud. I’m not a fan of drama queens, but I’m more than happy to be there for those I love.

Yes, some people are just easy to talk to.. because they’re good listeners. Just don’t be someone’s ear-bitch. If they only want to talk about themselves, and their problems ALL the time, without listening to you and your problems, they they’re just plain selfish.

I’m usually happy to be used as a sounding board. I’m not much good for anything else. Maybe that’s why I like making music?

My biggest pet peeve, ( after borrowers that make you go and collect your own stuff ) is useless complaining. Funny but, the only time I EVER get a headache is when I realize I have been listening to a certified whiner.
Recently some strange guy just launched into a 20 minute political rant in my store!
How freakin’ OBLIVIOUS can someone be to think that everyone within ear shot wants to listen to their twisted ramblings. Gah! haha