What do you do if you just feel like going MIA, running away, or hiding?

I take a nap. It often does wonders.
I would also recommend taking a course in holistic peer counseling. It gives you training and a network of trained people to talk to.

Long soak in the tub

Here’s a site I often frequent when I feel that way,

@6rant6 yes, I have found it to be comforting in my times of utter despair.

A good many years ago I simply gave up. I literally took my front door off its hinges, then told the entire neighbourhood to come and take whatever they wanted. I gave away everything I owned, got a tent and a backpack, and spent the next year homeless, hitching from province to province and just drifting. It was the best year of my life and I’ve never regretted it, even though at the time I was experiencing it, it seemed pretty miserable.

I have an acquaintance who is a Satanist. Once a year, he drags the entire contents of his house, all his possessions save the clothes on his back, out into the backyard, heaps them up, and sets them on fire. It keeps him from being too attached to material things, and it makes him think twice before he makes a purchase, since he knows he’ll have it for less than a year.

There’s nothing wrong with giving up. Sounds like you need to drop out, turn on, and tune in.

I think everyone thinks about it. Well, maybe not everyone, who knows, but I think a lot of people do. You can crawl into bed for a while and think about it and imagine it and fantasize about it but running away, curling up in a ball and hiding, those just aren’t options, they are not really something that you can choose to do. And sometime life is just about getting stuff, understanding stuff like that.

As hard as life can be, and it can be godawful hard and painful sometimes, you can only choose from the options available. It’s very often just that bottom line. You pick yourself up, dust yourself off and give it your best shot and if you fail, you crawl into bed for a bit but knowing that you will most certainly have to crawl out of bet pretty soon and give it another shot. I wish I had a better answer for you, some easier way.

So, and I don’t mean to trivialize your circumstances by giving you song reference, but I say, get up every morning, drag yourself out of bed or simply roll out of bed onto the floor if that’s the best you can do and play Tom Petty’s, I Won’t Back Down as loud as you can possibly stand it. And then play it again if it doesn’t work the first time. That has gotten me through more than a few rough days.

I think making sure you have at least one meaningful thing to do each day can help. Something that isn’t necessarily for you either. I know when my life was pretty much in a heap, having to get up every day to keep my kids fed, clothed and safe kept me sane and going. I also made myself keep doing things like turning up for lectures (I was an undergrad at the time) and tutes. Eventually, while it doesn’t feel like it now I am sure, life does pick up. Things do get better. So you sort of just have to fake it for a while and keep muddling along as best you can. That’s what I do anyway. I do hope you feel stronger soon. I know you don’t know me but if you want to message me and talk, happy to listen.

Try taking a vacation, or at least a day or five off.

@hurtntired I forgot to, but should mention that it’s just an ideal. I think I actually was stood up at the gates of hell a couple of time and I did back down. Sorry. There’s no shame in that really, I don’t think. The problem comes in being unwilling to dust yourself off, pick yourself up and star all over again. I would post a youtube link to the Fred Astaire of all that, dusting off and picking up but it just doesn’t seem quite right right now.

I agree lilycoyote, sometimes it is the right thing to do to say… enough, throw in the towel and live to fight another day. I don’t know what is going on for you Hurtinred, but if walking away is the right thing to do, do it.

I had a pretty bad case of that one spring some years back. And I was not in a situation where I really could run away. So I made up my mind to do three completely new things. One, I joined the Scottish society in my city, drawing on my grandmother’s national heritage as my ticket, just because I happened to hear an ad for one of their events on the radio. Two, I went to the Home Depot and bought tons of flower sets and planted flowers and shrubs all around our yard even though I had never taken an interest in gardening before. Three I forget, but that might have been when I cut my long hair short. The main idea was to get out of my rut and put myself in the way of some fresh new experiences.

It worked pretty well. Didn’t solve the problems, of course, but it got me past the urge to escape (the flowers were, not accidentally, a kind of a commitment to staying put) and helped me gain a little perspective toward finding some new answers.

1. Go to a peaceful place and write a list of what you are thankful for.
2. Play some music that makes you feel good.
3. Do something kind for someone that’s been kind to you.
4. Do something good for yourself that you wouldn’t normally do.
5. Go back back to the peaceful spot and write a list of how you want to feel, and what you want out of life. Then meditate on what’s important to you, and what you want to accomplish.
6. Be excited for change

Exercise until you drop.

Accept the fact that life is not perfect, you are not perfect and embrace and enjoy the things in life that make you smile….no therapist needed to do this.

I agree with exercise. Especially good is a hike through woods (extra oxygen) and nature.

Volunteer somewhere. If you work with people worse off than you are, you will feel better about your situation.

Take this depression self-test. If it comes out positive consider seeing your physician to talk about it. Consider the possibility of medication.

Do as @Deja_vu says and amke a list of your blessings (your child for example) and express thanks for those.

I understand the feeling you have of wanting to run away or hide. I’ve felt this at some very difficult times in my life. The instinct is to protect yourself from the pain, but you can’t run away from it, or block it out. You need to walk through it. Somehow you need to find your inner reserve of strength and face the thing that is causing you pain. It’s very true, I think, that while we all enjoy having as many happy times and good experiences in life as possible, often it is the bad times that teach us the most. They help us to grow. They have a part in making you the person that you are. Working through and surviving hard times can give us true wisdom. Some of the most enlightened people I know are the way they are because of the challenges they’ve had to overcome in life.

I’m sure you know this but it helps to remember this when you are going through a rough spot in your life. Instead of protecting yourself by running away, find ways to nurture yourself and fortify yourself. Don’t let yourself withdraw from people. Even getting out and taking walks (I especially love walking or sitting by the ocean. The vastness and power of it remind me of how small my place in this world is, but in a good way…) or going to a museum, anything that reminds you of all the beuaty in the world and gets you away from focusing on your problem. Even if the getting away is temporary and the problem remains, it’s good to distract yourself for a time.

The other thing that really helps me is music. Hearing a great song that either uplisfts me or makes me understand that someone else has had the same pain makes me feel better.
And of course reaching out to loved ones for support and just talking to someone who cares can help you through it. I hope this helps you. Remember that most hard times do pass. Just keep your hopes and dreams alive and be good to yourself.
Here’s a song that I like about remembering that “This Will Pass”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9CmUodjYuE

I really understand that feeling. I went through a period where I found life so overwhelming. I think the advice so far has been very helpful. If this is a situation you can walk away from, then I’d agree with doing so. Even though I don’t always want to address the roots of a problem, I do find that to be the only way to get through these times. I agree with @Earthgirl – she summed up alot of what I thought upon reading your question
If you feel like shutting yourself off for a while and you’re in a position to do that, then I’d go for it. If not, then I think it’s really important to look after the basic things such as diet and exercise while you’re going through this. Look after yourself as best you can. Just be kind to yourself I mean. That will help. Good luck. I hope things turn around soon.

Wear myself out with exercise then soak in the tub. I’ll also do a movie marathon and check in with friends. Every little spark counts to get me back on path. The feeling often passes in just a few days.

I used to look and see how much money was in the checking account, and then see how far I could get on a Grayhound, one way, for that much money. Then I would distract myself by looking online to see if I could live in that place.

The one thing that I learned from my daughter is that meaningful change happens because of lots of small steps. There is no big lottery win for life changes. Change happens with planning and networking. Break the big into the small.

Another thing that makes me feel good is picking up trash in a public place. It’s menial, it’s rote, it’s non-commital. It makes a huge difference. Perhaps it’s my Catholic background that I can never really shake, but there’s something meditative about willingly doing something that’s a community service like that, without being asked, without expecting acknowledgement. It’s sort of part of the “be the change” mentality. It can be quite empowering. The line of reasoning is “somebody should pick up the trash”——> “I am somebody.” The meditation on that carries forward to a self-commitment to being somebody.

I used to lay in bed and plan my perfect life when the last of my kids was out of the house. I was going to move to Oregon, have a little gray house with a big veranda, cats, and geraniums. I don’t understand the geraniums because I don’t love them. That planning and possibilty of a different life kept me going. I lived by a saying- ‘this too shall pass. A man I knew used to say, ‘It’ll be better in the spring” and in spring he’d say ‘Think of the crisp fall days”. I changed my hair color a lot when I felt trapped, exercised to try for elegant slimness, drank a little wine after dinner.

I have had days, weeks and whole months like that. I’d just sleep it off, or just lay on the couch and watch tv mindlessly, or drive out to the cinema and watch a movie alone—all worked well enough to distract me, but it wasn’t a long term contentment. So I started taking walks and that, more than anything, helped clear my head. It was a gateway of sorts because I started jogging, and then running and just getting into all kind of exercise. It was also during that time that I learned how to ride a unicycle.

Not to say that exercise is the cure-all, but that it was/is something that invited me back into the world whenever I felt like shunning it. Volunteering is also really meaningful for that (I volunteer at a non profit organization and a local library), but exercise is different in that it’s primarily for yourself and relies on you… and that was what I needed.

Really, any healthy endeavor or hobby you can throw yourself into (building model airplanes, knitting, bowling, cooking) can help.

@BarnacleBill, I really like your answer, especially the last paragraph. I never thought of that, but selfless service in general is a great principle.

My bad times went on for more than three years. At one point I bought a book on professional spies and read it with great attention. I wasn’t interested in international intrigue or industrial espionage. I wanted to know how people change their identities and disappear, and also how people who try that are tracked down and found. This was part of my escape fantasy, and as @faye and @BarnacleBill said, sometimes imagining it can give relief, even though as a rule I am against any kind of self-delusion. It’s kind of like getting out of the shower feeling really clean and fresh and imagining that for once it’s going to last.

I have done this before because of arrest warrants and evil women. Pack your shit move a thousand miles or more and start over. It helps if you don’t tell anyone where you are going if you don’t want to be tracked down.

Hunting – mostly the part where you sit by yourself in the woods all day – is very relaxing.

I wish I had good advice, but my question today is very similar to yours, plus I do just curl up in a ball and try to sleep it off, way too often. this would be precisely why I need advice on how to deal with it differently

I typically go to my room and dance to the songs that I feel convey the way I feel in that moment, whether it be general frustration, stress, anger, etc.

It’s OK to “run away” from your problems, as long as you come back to them. Carve out some time for yourself. Read a book, go on a walk, take a bath, or enjoy a relaxing beverage of your choice. Taking a brief hiatus from the problem will give you a fresh perspective.