When is abortion the right choice for a Christian?

It is completely and totally that one person’s decision, and everyone else just needs to stay out of it.

The thing is, it’s completely up to the person that is pregnant. The fact that those around them would rather them keep the baby is irrelevant. It’s not an easy choice to make and it certainly isn’t one made lightly in most situations. Keeping a child can also be viewed as a selfish choice, it’s really just a matter of perspective. I don’t think choosing to have an abortion is lazy or selfish and honestly, what their family may or may not do is irrelevant because they wouldn’t be the ones carrying a child and then raising it and being solely responsible for it.

@Seaofclouds I agree – the choice someone makes is purely their own business & should not hinge upon the views of another (other than perhaps the other parent in the creation of the child). If life were perfect no one would get into anyone else’s business etc., but of course no such luck LOL.

I was just curious what would the “right” decision be with regard to it being from the view of Christianity. Both options are wrong in accordance with what I have heard from Christians so in the case you’ve broken the sex before marriage rule and managed to get yourself pregnant and are posed with exposure of your mistake and the opposite choice of abortion (also wrong according to Christians) which choice is the top one?

You shouldn’t make judgments unless you’ve walked a mile in another person’s shoes. I believe that’s biblical.

It’s not my place to judge – it’s their own personal business. And many may feel that it will make their life easier, but usually if having a kids will make their life much harder, the kids life won’t be a cakewalk, either.

Really need more than “Christian” to know what they believe – there are just so many, many different beliefs within the Christian community.

I am a Christian and I have my own views as a personal choice on it but the bible tells me to love people exactly where they are and do not judge alot of Christians choose to overlook.
This does not mean I have to agree with or like what they say or do but it is certainly not my place to condemn someone for what they choose to do.

This would be a personal choice for someone that is between themself and thier Creator. Noone else has any right to pass judgement at all.

Why in the hell would you assume someone is selfish and lazy because they choose abortion?

That is an insult to anyone who makes that painful choice. Perhaps they just don’t feel as if they are able to raise a child properly, they feel the child would suffer because of their inability and for me the worst choice of all would be putting the child up for adoption. How could I ever sleep at night wondering if the child I brought into the world and then deserted is living a decent life.

Nope abortion is not lazy and selfish, it is often just the opposite and it doesn’t matter if you are christian or whatever, to me that is irrelevant.

When a Christian chooses:

Not to have continuous pregnancies because of family/social/religious pressure that overrides their own feeling of self preservation/individuality.

Not to have a child born of abuse or rape.

Not to have a child born out of other people’s desire for something _else _to love and care for.

Not to have a child born with medical issues/defects the woman/parents will feel overwhelmed by, if they fear they can’t provide the kind of care necessary.

Not to have a child born at the risk of the mother dying in order to feel they are right/moral/ethical/being troopers for their family/etc.

@rooeytoo In general I believe whatever someone wants to do is their own business – my question is in regards to how it specifically relates to the situation if this person is a Christian. I have a perception as to what Christians believe is worse between sex out of wedlock and abortion but I’m not sure if my perception is correct. In most of the responses above my question isn’t actually answered. I’m wanting to know if it is true that Christians believe abortion to be worse than sex out of wedlock that may result in pregnancy. From my experience of Christians they do, but my experience is only with a few hundred thousand Christians and not the millions that exist in the world so it could be that I’m perceiving just a small group as if they were the whole. To answer your question more specifically – I would assume that someone was being selfish or lazy if they were a Christian who spouted the belief that abortion is wrong and that there are support systems out there for someone who chooses to have the baby and then they turned around and did opposite of their espoused beliefs in order to avoid having to deal with the consequences of their actions or to avoid disappointing the authority figures in their life etc. That sort of motivation would be purely to benefit themselves rather than something that actually honored what they had preached was their belief prior to their getting pregnant. To me to choose a hypocritical decision just to save face and make your life easier is lazy and selfish. Abortion in general is not something I would believe to be selfish but someone who fits the above description in my opinion would. I would hate to be in that scenario and have to make that choice and unless you are in the situation I don’t believe a person can really know what they would or wouldn’t do – I’m glad I don’t have to worry about it and I have sympathy/empathy for anyone who is put in that tuff position. I have no idea what I would do if it were me. My question though is not regarding abortion in general but rather specifically for a Christian woman. What is worse choice & what does it say about the person if they choose the worse choice simply out of the fact that it makes their life convenient despite their religious views that it is in fact the worse choice.

@Neizvestnaya Thanks for the answer – it definitely answers the main question – do you have input as to what thing is worse between abortion and sex/pregnancy out of wedlock in the cases your list has not been met? For instance, let’s say that the person just got caught up in a moment and ended up pregnant which isn’t necessarily on your list – which is the best choice? Is it worse to have gotten pregnant and therefore best to cancel it out or is it worse to have the abortion and therefore the person should have the baby and then either raise it or adopt it out? Also, do you have input as to what it says about a person (ie. their character) if they do the thing they think is worst just to make life easier? I think that I personally in that situation would have a lot of guilt no matter which thing I chose if I had religious beliefs that held both things as wrong – but I’m curious what others feel regarding the worst choice and the character of someone who chooses to go opposite their espoused beliefs.

@dreamer31 I definitely agree that often people forget that big rule about loving everyone etc. What would you feel about yourself in that scenario as a Christian – which would be worse the pregnancy itself or the choice to have an abortion as it relates to your own beliefs about such things? And if you did the opposite of what you think is worse – what would you think about yourself? Would you have worse guilt from it or would the guilt be the same either way? Would you be hard on yourself and practice negative self-judgement etc.?

I personally feel like such things are a personal choice up to only the two parents who created the pregnancy & I have a belief as to what is right, but I also know that what is right for me isn’t right for everyone else. But, because I don’t have a particular religious attachment to my beliefs, I’m curious what the decision process would be for someone who does. My view is that the person consider the logic of their personal scenario & I agree for the most part with @Neizvestnaya ‘s answer but from what I’ve noticed the average Christian doesn’t support freedom of choice in any sort of full fledged way without limitations – that being the case I’m just curious what things tip or balance the scale during that decision for someone who is a Christian and has spouted those beliefs prior to their accidental pregnancy.

According to Numbers 5, husbands can force their wives to have abortions at the merest suspicion that the child she is carrying belongs to another man.

That aside, choosing not to abort can itself be an exercise in selfishness and/or vanity.

I would never want to be in the position where I had to choose, honestly that would be such a painful situation it is hard to imagine and I don’t want to.

But I do believe that for the people who have to make that decision, we can show empathy and compassion without judgement.

Whatever decision that is made should never just be discounted and assumed as being the easy way out whether it be birth, abortion or adoption.

I also want to add that Christians are humans who also make thier fair share of mistakes, no more or less than anyone else and one of those mistakes would be to forget this.

@SavoirFaire wow two interesting pionts – I didn’t know that about Numbers and that article was interesting – I remember hearing a similar story in the news a few years back. The story I remember was of a woman who had already had 2–3 other kids & was having her 4th pregnancy. She found out near the beginning of the pregnancy that she had a major cancer and her only chances of survival was to get immediate treatment but in order to get that treatment she’d need to abort the baby because chemo etc. would kill it anyway. She chose to keep the baby against the doctors recommendations because she would die if she waited on treatment & so may the baby anyway – Her choice was based on her Christian faith so she had the baby and 4–5 months later she died even though they induced labor at the moment the baby would be viable and then they started cancer treatment. So basically, she chose to birth a new baby into the world without a mother and to take the mother from 2–3 other children and burden a man to a life as a single father with 4 small children.

@dreamer31 I agree – a tuff decision and I’d hate to be forced to make it. I don’t think any of those decisions could necessarily qualify as the easy way out because none of them are easy, but I do think that if one is choosing what is convenient for themselves so they don’t have to deal with the harder consequences or so they can save face they are choosing the easiest way out for them. I’d say that sort of motivation for a decision is rooted just as much in the ego as the decision to judge a person for their choices rather than loving them unconditionally.

Do you have a view as to which choice is worse (if not for you specifically at least from your perception of Christians/Christianity in general)?

When is being judgmental and cruel the right choice for a Christian?

Do you have input as to what thing is worse between abortion and sex/pregnancy out of wedlock in the cases your list has not been met?
I believe it’s better to have an abortion for an out of wedlock pregnancy if the woman isn’t ready to be parent, isn’t equipped to be a parent will lose something signifigant already in place like going to college or beginning a demanding career. I also believe it’s better to abort than to give the baby for adoption unless the mother knows exactly who the parents will be and that they will be good parents and provide all necessary means.

Let’s say that the person just got caught up in a moment and ended up pregnant which isn’t necessarily on your list – which is the best choice? Is it worse to have gotten pregnant and therefore best to cancel it out or is it worse to have the abortion and therefore the person should have the baby and then either raise it or adopt it out?
Unplanned pregnancies aren’t like other choices, in my opinion. There should be no stigma to stick it out or abort just because it’s unplanned or the woman is single or unmarried. I believe the woman’s life must be valued just as much as the life she’d plan for the child if it was born and a weighing she does herself to see if she what decision she feels more comfortable with.

I’m not a Christian but I am human and have had two abortions in my life. Religion aside, deciding to end a life created by my body was very intense and I don’t think many woman treat it lightly, I didn’t. I had to weigh who I was at the time, what I was capable of at the time- weigh it against what I would want for my most precious known thing, a child. I chose once to not chance a child born with defects, another time I chose to not bear a child to man I was trying to escape. Both times I was a statistic of women who take birth control and end up pregnant anyhow. You never know and until the time comes to be in those shoes, it’s really hard to say what you’ll do.

As a human I believe there is guilt, not religious guilt but biological guilt that you’ve ended life. I believe it’s innate we protect our own at all costs and in the modern day, to choose instead of be at the mercy of nature feels ominous. In a way I think the religious who are against abortion have it easier to not make the decision on their own per se but to go with what they beleive god would want.

@Neizvestnaya – very sensitive, considered answer and filled with personal experience. Thank you for sharing.

Thanks @rooeytoo. It’s something I think often about, periodically asking myself what makes up “choice”.

@Neizvestnaya I think about my long-ago choice often too….

As a Christian, I feel that there is no clear answer. Every individual circumstance is different, so ultimately it is up to the individual to decide.

I am a Christian, but I feel that it is up to the individual woman. I would love for them to choose adoption (I was adopted), but I don’t think that the choice is theirs, not mine. I was adopted at birth, and I can honestly say that it was the best choice. (I am slightly fond of being alive!) My adoptive parents are wonderful and I am blessed to call them my parents. Because my adoption turned out so well I quite honestly do not understand people that say they could never condem(!) their child to that.

Everyone, many apologies! Obviously I forgot to proofread my answer. I meant to say that it is NOT my choice, it IS theirs. I am a Christian, but not everyone else is. I am in favor of adoption, but that is a difficult choice to make.

Thanks all – Sorry for my slow response – a major work week whew!!

@Neizvestnaya I think I pretty much agree with you – For me the choice is a crappy one to have to deal with regardless of your religious, financial etc. position in life. I believe that the choice should be made based on the logic of the whole situation in combination with whatever beliefs a person has and there is really no cut and dried answer when it all comes down to it.

@Harold Thanks – I grew up in a Christian family/environment though we weren’t as orthodox as many are (or claim to be), but now I’m probably more what folks would qualify me as Gnostic or Universalist depending on the day. I have met & known many Christians in my years though, and most seemed to be more against abortion than pregnancy before marriage, but I wasn’t sure what they would choose if posed with the perplexing situation of deciding what do do. Do they commit two wrongs or does their faith keep them/restrict them to a point of never choosing abortion? What does the average Christian believe with regards to whether or not faith requires one thing or another – do people judge or believe a person who has an abortion after having gotten in a pregnant before marriage situation as having lost their faith due to the fact that they committed two “wrongs” (not that I believe it is two wrongs but from my understanding of the average Christian belief it would be two wrongs) Being that I’m not by any means anything close to traditional or orthodox Christian I’ve always been perplexed at what one must go through in these sorts of situations. How does one choose when both choices are against their religion etc.? The whole thing is just perplexing to me and I’ve made the assumption that most people in such a predicament would rely on what they’ve been taught all their lives (which is why I included the parents/authority figures/peers in my original question comments) and therefore rely on what their peers would ask them to do.

@GracieT – Thanks for your comments. I can’t imagine someone thinking of adoption as condemnation (though often I hear that children will feel that way about it depending on their scenario – abandonment issues etc). My cousin has 4 adopted children and chose that option due to the fact that she couldn’t bear children to term so she has a very strong opinion with regards to abortion based partially on her view as a woman who wanted nothing more than to have children of her own and her view as a Christian woman. She loves her kids and has gone full fledged into being a mom & they were lucky to have escaped the foster care system and a drug addicted biological mother who ended up dying of an overdose while they were in the adoption processes. A sad situation all around but with a happy ending. I can’t imagine in that case adoption being condemnation over whatever living with a crazy crack-head mother who never was home and never fed you when she was there. I agree it’s all about whatever is right for each woman in the situation, but if we consider percentages and quality of life I’m not thinking adoption overall would qualify as condemnation.

So many are saying that it is the person that is pregnants business only. I think there is more to it than that. The innocent child that is aborted might just want a say in the matter. And the father of the child also has some rights in the matter. I just don’t think it is cut and dried that it is only the womans choice. There is a moral issue about when the child is aware. I just think this is deeper then meets the eye. If you don’t want to get pregnant then don’t do what it takes to be so.

@Summum Ok, let’s ask the unborn child. Seeing as how (s)he’s so human, (s)he has tons of ways of communicating and making their wishes known.

Now we are headed to the obsurd. LOL

@Summum Right, because there’s no chance I think your suggestion of taking the unborn child’s opinion into account is absurd.

But we don’t know enough about that life to say it has no say in the matter. There are a lot of what if’s when taking a life.

@Summum I’m sorry, that just made no sense. My brain is a bit more fried than normal. Would you mind restating that?

But we don’t know enough about that life (fetus) to say it has no say in the matter. There are a lot of what if’s when taking a life. Like what if the fetus understands and knows it is about to be killed?

@Summum Well, children don’t understand death until around age 4 (give or take a couple years, I can’t remember the exact age they get that Grandma isn’t coming back from that farm) so I think we can assume that anything younger than 2 years after being born doesn’t have the mental capacity to do so.

You are talking about after the birth what about before? We don’t know about the spirit in that child and how it views things.

Time for bed for me I have to get to work early. Anyway until we understand better about the spiritual side of life we cannot answer so many questions.

When is abortion the right choice for a Christian?
Only if carrying the child to term would mean death to the mother; which in turn means the baby will not survive anyhow.

Is my perception wrong? When posed with this hard life choice is a Christian being lazy & selfish when choosing abortion or would their families support this choice over them being an unwed, single mother?
No, you have it right. If I knew her, I would have to think hard if she was a sincere believer, because if she was, she would know in her heart she was wrong. If you do the crime, you do the time. If she did not want to get pregnant unmarried she should have kept her clothes on and her legs closed.

When the child is unwanted or unneeded. There are too many dang people now!