Can you add to these 12 rules for raising delinquent children?
1. Begin at infancy to give your child everything they want. In this way the child grows up believing that the world owes them something.
2. When they pick up bad words laugh at them. This will make them think they are cute and encourage them to pick up cuter phrases that will blow your mind.
3. Never give them any spiritual training. Let them wait until they are 21 and let them decide for themselves.
4. Avoid using the word “wrong”. It may develop a guilt complex. This will condition them to believe later, when they are arrested for stealing a car, that society is against them and they are being persecuted.
5. Pick up all they leave lying around the house, books, shoes, clothing. Do everything for them so they will be experienced in throwing all responsibility to someone else.
6. Let them read any printed matter they can get their hands on. Be sure to sterilize the silverware and plates and dishes, but let their minds feast on all kinds of garbage.
7. Quarrel frequently in the presence of your children. And that way they will not be shocked when the home breaks up later.
8. Give the child all the spending money they want. And never let them earn their own. Why should they have it as tough as we had it?
9. Satisfy their every craving for food, drink, and sensual pursuits. See that all their desires are gratified. Denial may lead to harmful frustrations.
10. Always take your child’s side against the neighbors, teachers, and police. They are all prejudice against your child.
11. When they get into real trouble, apologize for yourself by saying, I never could do anything with them.
12. Prepare yourself for a life of grief. For you probably will have it.
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17 Answers
When your child first start to show signs of aggressive behavior (such as punching others and you), wait until they are teenagers before addressing the issue.
Don’t say anything to them when they use the word Hate.
If they hate someone at school, let them feel their emotions are justified.
@AmWiser Or get their cute whacking of people with a baseball bat, or throwing their bike down in a violent temper tantrum on video and send it to America’s Funniest Home Video.
Excuse their rudeness to others by saying, “They are just kids.”
Allow and encourage temper tantrums in stores and other public places by buying them off.
Many points on this list lead to spoiled children but I don’t know that delinquent is the right word. Delinquent children are often neglected as @Sandman points out.
Expect your children to do as you say, not as you do. After all, they’re “just kids” and you’re the adult.
Never listen to what your children have to say or ask for their opinion. If they disagree with you, punish them.
Punish your children for mistakes that they make that they tell you about on their own.
Expect your children to live your life over, only more perfectly than you did when it was your turn.
@sandman and @tranquilsea The definition of delinquent and juvenile delinquent differ.
What exactly is “spiritual training” supposed to mean? I hope you’re not implying that children raised without religion are more likely to become “delinquents”...
But here are a few I could add:
13. Force your children to adhere to strict gender stereotypes. Girls play with dolls, boys play with cars. No exceptions. Any deviation should be suppressed.
14. Make sure your children do not follow their own interests and dreams; instead live vicariously through them.
15. Beat them when they get a grade lower than an A.
And most importantly:
16. Never listen to your children. You are totalitarian. Your children have no say in how anything in the household, family, or in their own lives operates.
Let them think that any way they want to express frustration or anger is ok. (I don’t think the feelings should be denied, btw, this is a comment on people who think it’s ok for their kids to throw fits when they don’t get what they want).
@DominicX I just copied and pasted this from the ‘net. I didn’t edit either. So “spiritual training” is an option, except as it pertains to morality and decency. But thanks for reading it all!
Encourage them to never cry, bottle up their emotions, and release them as anger instead.
Beat them at random intervals for no apparent reason.
Good answers ya’ll.
Be inconsistent. What was cute and funny yesterday deserves a beating today. (inspired by @wundayatta
Encourage them to be just like you, warts and all, and to actively shun outsiders or anyone ‘different’. We don’t want nobody ‘different’ ‘round these parts.
If they won’t stop doing something after you’ve told them six times to stop, throw your hands up, give up, walk away and say, “He never listens to me!”
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