How do you handle a friendship that you feel is beyond repair?

Have you tried just distancing yourself from this person rather than dumping her. Just don’t hang out with her and the less you see or talk to her, the less you will know about the drama in her life.

Welcome to the adult world, where few are real friends, and many are just people we know.

In high school, it’s hard to distinguish between friends and classmates. It gets easier the more you have experiences like you’re having.

Have no guilt about moving on. She’s someone you know. Not a friend.

Put her on a list on FB where you can’t see her posts, and she can’t see yours. She probably will never notice that you’re not showing up in her feed.

Being friends on Facebook does not require interaction. You needn’t comment on (or even read) her posts or respond to her comments. If she reaches out to you positively, you can reply politely. If she says or posts something critical of you, you can message her privately and politely and say you didn’t like that. And you can always defriend her. Chances are good she might not even notice.

The one that is definitely not going to happen is that you are going to remake her into the person you would like her to be.

Stopped being friends.

@chyna: I have distanced myself, I tend to try to stay away from the places that I know she frequents, but at the same time, the area that I live in isn’t that big, so I know at some point our paths will cross. I’m not built to fake what I’m feeling in regards to this situation. However, I am going to continue on keeping my distance.

@BarnacleBill: Good point, you’re right, it took the second time around to confirm that she’s definitely not a friend, but just someone that I know.

@zenvelo: I’m going that route for the time being. I’ll see what happens, but mentally and emotionally I’m already done extending myself to being in a revolving door friendship.

You don’t have to avoid her physically, but you can distance yourself. If you run into her, ask how she is, ask about parents/pet/boyfriend, listen without commenting, and say “gotta go, nice running into you!” If she asks about you, no matter what’s going on, as far as she’s concerned everything’s fine; she doesn’t need to know your business going forward.

There is a phrase that goes, if you have a problem with someone, it is your problem. When I learned to view others with that thought in mind, my life became so much simpler.

Don’t concern yourself with the behavior of this other person, allow them to live their life without your judgement or intervention and you concentrate on living your own life, that is the only one you have any control over anyhow.

If you adopt that way of thinking and acting, the whole situation will solve itself!

This is a fairly common occurrence.

Don’t announce anything. Just stop contacting her.

Unfriend her quietly on Facebook.

Speak politely but briefly to her when you are forced to see her in group situations.

I am very up front with all my friends. I explain that I have to get as much or more than I give in a relationship. If it’s too one-sided it does not work for me. I explain that what seems simple for me can be a huge boon to someone else, but if I don’t get anything of quality back in return, I have to stop being friends. Perhaps you can’t do that with this person right now, but in the future if you are asked, it’s a way to clear the air with no hard feelings.

I am not sure how her interactions with men really affect you? So, perhaps you could just as has been suggested ignore the posts where she goes on about her relationships? Keep the contact to a minumum.

If something she is doing actually relates to the way she engages with you though, different story. I had a similar situation where an old “friend” and I reestablished contact (I am now in Australia, she is still in the UK) and she let me down in very similar circumstances to the original reason we had broken contact but this time it cost me over $1000. I could have been upset but really, she is who she is and I can’t change that. Her behaviour just doesn’t fit with the way I feel friends treat each other. Certainly I wasn’t happy about the loss of money, but I put it down to a learning experience and I have broken contact with her. Not out of bitterness but simply because we obviously still don’t share the same values about friendship and how to treat people.

Sometimes, you just have to let people leave your life or even remove them from your life.

You can stop being friends with her, and she probably won’t even notice. From what it sounds like, she is only friends with people when she needs something from them. When you aren’t there to help her pick up the pieces of her life, she will turn to someone else.

Any relationship that feels like “is beyond repair” is ended . Any relationship that has ended in the past…Stays Ended…..I heard a saying a long time ago that I really like… but don’t remember where I heard it…

“Only a fool walks into the future backwards”... You can’t see where you’re going if you only focus on where you’ve been

That is a key factor in my life…The past stays the past.

I got on Facebood a couple years ago, and an ex-friend from 25 years ago contacted me, and wanted to have dinner. Hey, it’s been 25 years, so I figured he was plenty hungry, so I agreed.
The closer we got to the actual dinner, the more angry I became at him. All the issues I had put to the side years ago came back up on me. Finally, I just put it off indefinitly. I feel much better.

Send her a chocolate cake with a red candle hidden in it.

Just an idea.

@6rant6 lol….Sending someone Cake could cause problems…

@6rant6 Can you explain that to me?