Have you ever been troubled by your personality?

I am not sure what your question is.

I don’t think that you can assume an introverted person suffers more than others.

I wouldn’t say troubled, specifically. I’ve kicked myself metaphorically every once and again because I just can’t seem to quiet either my words or my insides, but that’s just how I am. As for the introvert thing, certain things are harder for some introverts than they are for extroverts.

Introverted people, who perhaps make up the more intelligent proportion of the population, have advantages and disadvantages in how they cope with the world around them – just like most other personality dimensions (openness, conscientiousness, agreeableness, and neuroticism)* translate into advantages and disadvantages. It’s a large part of what makes people suited to certain tasks, and it helps in forming work-groups to know how to pair people with different traits.

* Easy ways to remember all these traits: an ancryonym. OCEAN or CANOE work. Openness, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism.

As a major introvert, I can understand what you mean. We process things by internalizing and dwelling on them rather than throwing them out in the world to see what comes back.

It’s not a bad trait as many of our best scientists and philosophers are introverts. However, we introverts do tend to carry our own burdens rather than seeking the support of others.

Can someone first tell me what introverted means?

@queenie: these days, in psychology, it’s generally settled on meaning something along the lines of inward-thinking and solitary. It’s probably easier to define extroversion, which refers to the desire to want to socialize, communicate (especially orally), hang out with people, etc.. Introverts are the opposite.

I think Myers-Briggs used a slightly more complicated definition, which is why I said “these days….”

No, I don’t see any ‘problems’ with my personality.

I’m a Sanguine personality, extroverted to the 10th power, talkative, enthusiastic, fun loving, cheerful and the eternal optimist. I am not obnoxious in any way, and am self aware enough to watch how my energy might be affecting others. I am extremely articulate and a straight shooter which can be intimidating to some quieter, less expressive types.

I have a couple of more Introverted friends and they complement me often on my ‘formidable yet sincere’ personality. One more Phlegmatic friend tells me all the time how she has learned from me to be a more open and approachable person.

Seems that it would be likely.
But I don’t know. I am not an introvert.
Whatever, I have few complaints.

Well then, I think I am an introvert,, and I have no problem being one…
I’ve never really thought about it before to be honest.

I’d simply say that the more conscious one is of oneself, the more one tends to suffer.

Introverts are often (not always) highly self-conscious, which makes them ill-at-ease around others, unable to blend well in social situations, and feeling isolated. That’s all painful stuff.

Extroverts can be highly self-conscious too, though. Their gregariousness may be driven by a need to be acknowledged and affirmed by others. If that’s the case, then there’s an element of suffering in there too, though it may be less obvious.

Some people have more of a knack for forgetting about themselves in social situations. They harmonize well with others because they aren’t worried about how they’re being perceived all the time. They just show genuine interest in others and respond to social cues appropriately and spontaneously, all because they’re not so concerned with self. People like that do suffer less

My personality? Which one?

I think it’s more likely that others are troubled by my personality!

I’m bothered by one of them…

Being an introvert has made social situations incredibly uncomfortable and difficult at times. It has also caused me to internalize things and then analyze them to their core, which is exhausting and often troubling. It is difficult to distract myself from myself – if that makes sense. I often feel I am consumed by myself and there is no easy external escape. My world feels very small much of the time. This doesn’t mean I only think about myself, only that I get caught up in the tangle of thoughts in my mind. Much of my analyzing, agonizing and searching is about issues far greater such as homelessness, hunger, child abuse and education… and much of it is about issues far smaller such as how to eat an Oreo, which route I should take home, our brand of toilet paper… I’m so serious.

I envy extroverts, although I know most have their own issues. I just want to get out of my own head.

On the other hand, this same internal searching has led to a deeper understanding of things, the patience to work out the exact lines of a poem, the ability to get lost in a good story, spending hours in the library (or, now, online) researching one thing that leads to another and to another and then to another until I’ve gone from Martin Luther King, Jr. to the way bullets are made and everything in between.

To answer your question I would say yes. The way I see it, nobody’s perfect – we all have certain strengths and weaknesses, and the fact that we would like to be perfect can cause undue stress and worry (but it can also motivate one to try and change their personality). Being an introvert myself, I would make the analogy of being in a car where the wheels aren’t touching the road. You’re there but you’ve got no traction so moving through life can be difficult at times because you are not making connections with people/reality, rather you’re all in your head.

Yep. My personality changes with my mood and level of comfort. Since those two things are ever-changing, so is my personality. I wish I could be more consistent.

My answer to the general question would be “yes.” Sometimes there are things about my personality that make me stop and think and worry about myself a little bit. However, none of those things have to do with my introversion. Introverts do not need to be ‘fixed.’

I’ve been troubled because of being introverted, sure. I’m pretty socially awkward, which I suppose is evident due to the fact that I’m posting something here. Introversion can be a nice thing though, because it allows me to be satisfied with my own company, which no one else is satisfied with.

I’m also a perfectionist. I consider this to be much more problematic than being an introvert. This causes me to be easily stressed by trivial things, because I set myself a standard I cannot meet. This also makes me frustrated when things are not symmetrical or even. Like these paragraphs.

No. I am trouble by the personalities of others. So many assholes.

My personality troubles other people. I get along just fine with me.

God, yes! They call it mental illness. The chemicals in your brain start behaving in a different way, and suddenly you are paranoid, or overreactive or you interpret events quite differently from everyone else. Maybe you start getting depressed and next thing you know you have no hope left in the world and are ready to die.

Then you take some meds and a few weeks later you can’t even think the thoughts you were thinking while sick.

Even if you are medicated and fairly stable, your personality can change rapidly. You can go from being interesting a popular to chasing everyone away in moments, it seems. Then you do the damage to the relationship and it’s over.

Yes, I have always been bothered by my personality. I have a hard time relating to most people as I have zero interest in sports, fashion, or computer games.

yes and no, I constantly ride the wave of introvert and extrovert, both equally as strong as the other, I am a Gemini which may explain some of it, I confuse myself often and sometimes I don’t quite get the right of the two traits in the right situation, I can be very indecisive which even pisses me off at times but on a good note I do like having a broad imagination which helps me understand others better in either trait :)

@theninth Your personality delights me, and makes me worry less about mine. It’s nice to find people whose weirdness matches your own. ♥ :D

I am definitely an introvert. The biggest problem with that is that it causes me to not reach out to people. I have a profound fear of rejection. Whenever anyone reacts negatively to me I get very hurt and I just sort of go back into my shell. its lonely in there but as least its warm and familiar I have heard the difference between intorverts and extroverts described this way-Extroverts become energized and refreshed by being around other people and socializing, Introverts become refreshed and ready to face the world again by having solitary time to themselves.

1. In answer to the “question”: No, an introvert doesn’t always suffer more in handling the same situation as extroverts (assuming that’s what you’re asking). Each personality type has strengths and weakness. Plus, there’s much more to personality type than just introversion and extroversion. People are very complex.

2. I’d like to clarify that introversion isn’t the desire to socialize or not. You can be shy and be an extrovert. Introversion and extroversion deal with where you get your energy from. I enjoy socializing and doing things with friends just as much as anyone else, but sometimes I just need some down time afterwards, whereas an extrovert probably wouldn’t.

I definitely disagree with the statement that “Introverted people… make up the more intelligent proportion of the population.” Introversion does not equal intelligence. There is no “better” or “best” personality type. Each type has strengths and weaknesses, and part of life is learning who you are and improving yourself. I would say, however, that in general American society values extroversion more. I think it’s also important to remember that nobody is always an introvert or always an extrovert, etc. We all use different aspects of personality type according to the situation, but we all have preferred ways of acting and thinking.

@Aqua What you say about introversion not being equal to desire and/or ability to socialize is true; however, I do believe it is one of the most common issues introverts, as a whole, face.

It’s really a great comfort for me to get so many answers here. Thank you all.Some of you are troubled by this sort of personal weaknesses just as I am. I hope that it needn’t to be fixed but to find a style of life that suits you. The fact is sometimes you enjoy being solitude,but more often you betrayed yourself.You want a lot of friends and you have a desire to experience all things.But always you failed to.

Time’s pressing, I must leave now.

@Aqua: if you’re going to disagree with something, at least try to quote and interpret it correctly. Anyway, introverts often do tend to have stronger verbal skills and whatnot – they’re likely to be either more intelligent or better at developing their intelligence. Nobody said introversion equates intelligence.

Intelligent extroverts are often the people who are quick on their feet in a debate.

Every ‘type’ has it’s pros & cons.

As an extrovert who is also quite intellectual and a lover of myriad knowledge, with boundless mental energy to explore, I am often very frustrated and unfulfilled in many of my interactions.
Few of my friends share my enthusiastic personality and diverse interests.

I am often bored to tears by listening to the same repetitive, mundane, concerns of some.

Extrovert/introvert, it really doesn’t matter much as each have their challenges and frustrations.

I often feel ‘lonely’, not in the physical sense, as I am well integrated, cherish my solitude as well, BUT…I have adapted to walking a ‘lonely path’ when it comes to finding others that share my energy and love of learning.

While introverts may be often misread as “too” aloof, perhaps, and/or conceited, socially inept and any/all other negative labels, it’s not easy being an extrovert either.
Often we have to learn to be our own best friends as we can be overwhelming and too intense for others.

I truly think that all relationships and work situations should implement personality testing to facilitate the best understanding of how each type shows up.

I absolutely cannot and will not tolerate any environment that has micro-managing traits.

I need to be FREE to do and create without constraints.