Staying away from negativity; how do you do it?

Isolation has a lot to do with it, I tend to keep myself to myself as much as possible….. :-/
And bury my head in work…......

Just walk away, baby. Hear no evil, see no evil, umm…

I close my mind and think of something else.
I will walk away or try to turn my back on negative situations.
Also meditation and music takes my mind off of negativity.

Negative energy from others or from within yourself?

As you know by now, I detest country music.

I avoid negativity by not listening to the suicide music played on the country music radio stations.

Last two years of my life have been my “Spring Clean” from negativity. I stopped talking to all my “friends” who just brought me down, used me, and didn’t have a good attitude. I stay track on keeping away negativity by hanging out with good people and having fun. I also found a job that I really enjoy, and I love to travel. Life is all about the adventure, why be dragged behind by negativity?

psychocandy, I have been a bad, bad girl. I need to reign it in (confronting assholes)...

Think of assholes as having a communicable disease that you don’t want to catch.

You stay away from it/them etc. Concerning negative people or groups, some may feel they need those people around just because they have no one else or already belong. Negative situations you just can’t help sometimes, though.

Bad girls need gentle loving correction.

But what is this negativity? Is it something you do? Something you’re ashamed of? Or something you don’t like about yourself because you’re depressed?

Frankly, I don’t bother. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. The thing that works for me is accepting that this is who I am. I accept it. I give up on trying to fight it. And then it seems to lose much of its power.

But if what you are trying to stop is confrontations with assholes, then you are in deep shit, because that does not, strictly speaking, make you a bad girl. This sounds like a situational thing, and maybe it happens occasionally but it probably makes society better. But then, I have no idea what you are talking about.

@wundayatta I should have been more specific. Namely, I am talking other negative individuals in your life.

Look here.

As far as any tendencies you personally may have, focusing on your goals and visualizing what achieving them will be like should do the job. As for other individuals, simply tell them that they spend entirely too much of their time being negative about things and that if they don’t change it, you may have to distance yourself from them.

With others, I breathe; and then I try to sense their intention behind it. I believe that behind every action is a positive intention – even if it is a matter of feeling threatened, or feeling they need to express themselves. I then interact in a way that appeals to the best within them; sometimes this includes humour, sometimes this is a matter of listening. Sometimes it’s a matter of being clear about boundaries. “You know, I don’t feel comfortable about talking about X behind their back.”

Sometimes it really is a matter of breaking the modality. My brother is the best at it – when I rant he’ll laugh and make me realise how seriously I’m taking things.

Not all actions are intentional.

I get angry, I flare up, I take action and eventually I rip all threads in connection to the negativity and I never look back. Too bad for them.

I’ve recently taken to hanging up on my brother when he starts bitching. I can’t take his negativity. It works.

I’m with @marinelife here. Life is too short to have to put up with or tolerate negativity being thrown at you by anyone or to invite it in.

I have taken matters into my own hands. We now rarely see negative family members and now have zero negative friends. When we do “have to” visit with the negative family members, we make a point to remain as positive as possible. We tend to deflect and ignore as best we can.

I acknowledge getting fired up, tell myself it’s ok to get angry and I also tell myself some things about other people aren’t worth getting too deep into. I imagine myself with rings of people around me, some people get moved to the outer rings now and then depending on how the affect me, positively or negatively.

I struggled with this question a lot during my late teens (and still do to a degree).
After a lot of thought and a bit of research i found that the philosophy of Yin & Yang helped me to accept the negativity in the world (and my life) yet to never give up hope on the positive.
I like to think that for every negative thing that ever happens, it ain’t too bad because it must create its equal and opposite.

The list of people you truly care for and value their perspective, insight and opinion should be counted on one hand (ok, maybe two…and a foot).

Everyone else? Keep ‘em at arm’s length, give very little of yourself to them, spend little time with them, block them out…in other words, fuck ‘em.

Care little about the many and completely about the few.

You know, it’s a great freedom we give ourselves when we say, “No more!”

I have an older sister, I love her. That’s about all that is left. Evidently, I am responsible for all the bad things in her life. Not drugs, not alcohol…me. Oh, the fact that my marriage hasn’t failed also bothers her. (I’m sure this has nothing to do with her string of failed relationships.)

See where I’m going? I love my sister, but it just doesn’t work, on a day-to-day basis. I’m the first one there, when she needs help or really is hitting a major bipolar low.

We just don’t work with constant contact. I drew the line. I had to do this, toxic relationships are bad for your health!

@cak we have too much in common. I had to draw the line with my dad, before his death. I’ve had to draw the line with my in-laws (toxic city). And have had to greatly limit contact with my sister.

I love them all. All of them are way to mentally draining.

@SpatzieLover: that means that you have a lot in common with @Jillthetooth!

It’s a hard decision, but sometimes, it must be done.

@cak the three amigas of positivity ;)

Honestly the past few months I was feeling really negative. About silly things too. I hated going to work every day. And my job doesn’t suck. I just fucking hated the thought of having to work. Isn’t that ridiculous? I just wanted to be able to be home and bake bread and desserts all day and knit. Anyhow, I was always tired and glum. Then I realized that it’s stupid. My life doesn’t suck. Aside from being broke, I have a partner that loves me and a fat cute cat (and so do you!) and a supportive family, and A JOB. Why the hell was I so upset? So I started getting out more….even if it’s a chilly day and I just lift some weights, I feel so much better. It’s instant energy. And now, even though I’ve been working more, I just approach the day with a smile and a positive attitude and look at things optimistically and now pretty much every day I have a great day. I think your attitude has a lot to do with it. I mean, I know this is pretty basic, but I love this planet and think its beautiful and I’m really lucky just to be on it….........and that just does a lot for me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is something I really worked on my last year of college. I found that the drama in my life really consumed me, so I made the decision to try to eliminate it.

The example I’ll share is with my a cappella group. We would often have heated discussions and hold resentment against each other, and these often led to dramatic email threads. I was always a participant in these, and it wasn’t pretty. To combat it, I closely watched a friend of mine who was also in the group. She really seemed to have her shit together, and managed to make positive contributions to the group without participating in the arguments and accusations. I’m sure she had opinions, but she knew it wasn’t worth it to present them.

I tried to be a member of the group just like her. This often meant crafting long, scathing emails, thinking of her, and deleting them and going to bed. It’s amazing how walking away from a situation can help so much.

By reminding myself that an important goal in life is being part of the solution, instead of being part of the problem.

Listen, Think…........then Speak.