How to interpret mixed signals...(Update on my situation of the guy I like)
Ok-no I haven’t shown any courage and talked to him yet…and I don’t know how to interpret tonight. So I sat out in the lobby and studied the whole time. He walked by once, running out to his car I guess, but didn’t say anything to me. I don’t know if he knew I saw him or not. I may have looked like I was deep in concentration and he didn’t want to disturb me, or maybe he didn’t want to say hi…:(
He leaves. I know he saw me because I was sitting right at the end of the hallway, still studying mind you. He took a while before he actually left, and I wondered at that. Even after he left out, I continued to work for about 10 minutes, then ran in the bathroom before going out to my car. I figure by now he’s long gone. When I walk across the parking lot, his car is sitting there running/warming up. I walk to my car and he finally drives by on his way off campus.
What I can’t figure out is if he’s avoiding me. He doesn’t speak to me, but I thought he’d be long gone by the time I left and he was still in his car in the parking lot. I mean, no-one needs that long to warm up their car, right?
Someone tell me what you think…if he is avoiding me, than I’m worried about trying to talk to him, how he’ll react, etc…
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9 Answers
Without conversation, one will never know.
What you just described was the perfect intro into polite small talk:
“Hey it’s cold out there! Warming up your car so you’ll have a toasty ride home?”
Add a smile, and you have yourself a start.
From my experience, a guy that likes a girl will find a way to talk to her, go out of his way to talk to her and not be coy about it.
Yeah, so I’m thinking I’m barking up the wrong tree @chyna. Problem is, @SpatzieLover because he didn’t even say hi tonight, I thought maybe he didn’t want to talk. So then, whatever little courage I had went out the door…
Stop, stop, stop agonizing and trying to interpret with no data. Maybe he sat in his car making a phone call. It is not all about you.
Start talking him to find out what he is thinking.
@yankeetooter You will never even make a guy friend if you don’t have some initiative. In my experience, no guy wants to do all the work. If he likes you, then he may have all the same weird sh!t running through his head that you do:
“Does she like me? I’ll walk by & see if she says hi. She didn’t say Hi or smile…crap. I’ll putz around while warming my car…”
Or, it could be that he doesn’t even notice you exist, because you never speak to him. Who the heck knows until you talk to him?!
Frankly I think you are putting this man in a very uncomfortable position. As your former instructor, if he is interested, he may still feel it is a breach of ethics to become involved. If he is not interested, he may want to avoid creating an uncomfortable situation in his work place by letting you know that.
Regardless of his reason for not making a move on you, the fact remains that he has not made a move on you. I think you should be respectful of his career and leave him alone. Find someone to date with whom you don’t have a complicated power dynamic.
I am with @chyna.
If he was interested he would be more direct and show you.
@SpatzieLover I do talk to him occasionally…but I don’t force myself on him. Whenever he sees me and that I saw him, he always makes a point of saying hi, asking how I am doing, etc…but maybe he’s just being polite because he knows I’ve seen him at that point…
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