How to stop liking a guy? Either that or asking him out?
Asked by
ariah (
360
)
April 7th, 2011
I’ve liked a guy for three years now. He is amazing. He has never dated anyone before and right now I’m sure we are just friends. It kills me. We are both insanely busy people and I know that maybe it wouldn’t work out. I already know I’m not his type and that he deserves somebody happier and more stable; somebody smarter than me. I’ve tried everything and I still end up crying myself to sleep after writing a letter to him that I will never send. I need this to stop, really. If after two years of being friends one or the other has not said anything then I might as well find a way to make myself stop feeling so dizzy all the time, right? Help? Please?
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10 Answers
Have you ever asked him to be your boyfriend? Or even talked to him about the subject?
How old are you, how old is he, and have you told him you like him?
How old are you? Do you act like just a friend, or are you sort of flirty with him? Does he talk with you about other girls?
Some guys don’t pick up on cues on their own; you have to be direct with them.
I am a high schooler. He is in my grade. We are good friends, but when we are alone, ha acts awkward like he isn’t sure about… something. I have hinted pretty strongly at wanting to go out…
Stop hinting and tell him directly that your interested in him romantically and let the chips fall where they may.
Either way, you’ll have dealt with it and will be relieved of the anxiety.
3 years is long enough, yeah?
If you’re a freshman, and you’ve known him since middle school, he may not be ready to date yet. If you’re a junior or senior, he may be ready to date, but not know how. If he’s not talking to you about liking other girls, then he may be interested in you, too. Tell him you really like him, and ask him if he’s ever thought about dating you. If you have a prom or spring dance coming up, ask him to go with you.
It’s the 21’s century; it’s ok for girls to ask out guys (you can thank your mom’s generation and all of the bras that were burned in sacrifice). If he agrees, take things slowly and see where they go. Best of luck.
First, be kind to yourself. Even if you and this guy are not compatible (which you can’t be sure of, not having dated him), that doesn’t mean that you are not smart enough, not cheerful enough, or otherwise deficient in some way. You must learn to appreciate your strengths and personality. Even if said personality doesn’t mesh with someone else’s, that doesn’t make you bad.
That said, I agree with the others. If you don’t try, you’ll never know. You’ll always wonder, “You know, _____ and I had good chemistry, would we have made a good couple? Did he ever like me back?” It is better to ask the question, even if you don’t get the answer you want, then to wonder for the rest of your life.
Meant to say “than”, not “then”. I must have weekend brain.
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