What's the tipping etiquette here?

It really depends on if you’re splitting the check evenly, or divvying it up based on who ate what. If you’re only paying for what you ate, then you don’t need to tip as much. But if you’re all paying equally, then you need to tip equally.

I think $2 would be fine in your case. I’m not a fan of joint bills in restaurants, because something like this often tends to happen. I’d prefer to pay separately and also tip separately.

If your friends all ordered more expensive meals than you did, then yes, they should tip more.

We divvied it up based on who ordered what.

@bslie – Then I’d say that you were perfectly justified in tipping less.

There doesn’t really seem to be any logic behind it, does there? On the one hand, no doubt you received the same level of service as did all the other members of your group. On the other, by ordering a $10 meal instead of an $18 one, you implicitly agreed to a gratuity of $2 rather than $3.

In your place I’d have put in the $3 if I could afford it, and if I was short I’d have said “I think $2 will cover it for me.”

I think you were right. I hate when people try to split bills evenly….uh….it’s not that much harder to look at the bill and figure out what you actually need to pay. Some people go all out at restaurants and get drinks, a salad, entree, dessert. I do not and since I’m not reaping the benefits of getting dessert, a drink, or anything else, I will not be paying for it either.

It’s a dollar, either way you go, it’s still just a dollar at a restaurant where dishes are apparently at least 10x that.

You’re out with friends, and apparently keeping a pretty close eye on everyone’s tab, that can’t be fun. If tipping $1 less helps you enjoy your meal and feel good about it, no one is hurt.

If the dollar makes a difference in your life, keep it. If not, be generous.

When I’m out with friend, we almost always pay for what we ordered and leave whatever tip we feel like.

In your situation, I supposed I’d pay the $3 just because there are always people who blow it out of proportion.

Whenever I’m eating with friends, we all just kind of throw in money without worrying about a dollar here or a dollar there. If everyone puts in a little more than they think they’re supposed to, that usually covers it. Somehow the actual bill, once you include extras like tip and drinks, is more than you expect. It all evens out in the end.

I think nitpicking over a dollar ruins the tone of a good meal, but being generous and throwing in an extra dollar lifts the tone.

The important thing is that the entire tip was appropriate for the service rendered, based on the total, no matter who had what. I’ve been known to pad the tip a bit if the total left wasn’t enough. Having spent a few years on the other side, if the service is good, I want to make sure the server is well treated. They work hard to make sure your meal is pleasant, and in a lot of houses they have to portion up part of their tips to bartenders, runners and buspeople.

@JilltheTooth I’ve padded the tip if I felt I was a bit of a difficult patron…

I usually tip 20% because it’s easier to do in my head than 15–18%. So yes, $2 is perfect. If their meal was $18, they should have tipped $3.60 each, so throwing in $3 was actually undertipping compared to your $2 on a $10 meal.

@MyNewtBoobs : Believe me, a nice tip makes for a lot of forgiveness! :-)

@JilltheTooth That’s kinda what I figured, and that kinda why I do it.

First of all, it’s a dollar. I understand your point, but seriously. It’s a dollar.
Second, your friends are the ones who committed the faux pas by only leaving $3 on an $18 meal. They should tip more like $3.60 or since pocket change seems to have gone the way of the dodo, $4 each. Cheap friends.
Edit: Looks like Bill beat me to it, but it bears repeating. I also believe in 20% gratuity as a baseline. My one exception is anything under $20 automatically gets a $5 tip. So if I have a $12 lunch the tip is $5. I can not imagine anything less than that.

To those who say “it’s a dollar” – those 1 dollars add up really, really fast when your in a tight position, financially. It’s the same idea as coupon clipping – saving $.35 here, $1.24 there adds up to real money quite quickly.

@MyNewtBoobs – As someone who feels it’s just a dollar, I feel like I need to clarify.

I don’t think anyone is trying to minimize the impact of a single dollar on a tight budget.

But if a dollar is making or breaking your food budget, then alleviate the stress and don’t spend $15 on a prepared meal that’s brought to you… there’s a difference. It’s a luxury.

Looking through I don’t think anyone has said the original poster is in the wrong either way, so it all comes down to what they’re comfortable with. The server has received worse than $2 on $10 (which is fine) and it won’t affect their day regardless. If you can do for others, do it, if not, don’t let something trivial mark your evening with friends.

@funkdaddy Well, if everyone else is getting $18 dishes, and the OP is getting a $10 dish, they probably are trying to alleviate stress. But even people trying to save should still be able to go out once in a while, or see friends, or even do the two together.

@BarnacleBill @breedmitch You take 20% as the baseline? I’ve always used (and been told) its 15%. By that calculation they should have spend $2.70, so $3.00 is good.

Roundsquare, the cost of living is high where I live, so I assume it is for my servers, too.

I use a 15 -20% range. If the service was just so-so, I tip 15% I generally round the amounts up or down and multiply, and round off the tip. Generally, the servers share the tips with the bussing staff as well. And moving the decimal place and doubling is much easier than moving the decimal place, halving the number and adding it to the first in my head. Tips don’t have to be an exact science, but they do have to be fair.

Waiting tables is tough, and often if a waiter/waitress gets stiffed on a tab by a table, they have to pay it out of their own pocket. A friend of my daughter’s once accidentally dropped some receipts out of her apron, and had to reimburse the restaurant for 8 tables, even though they were all credit card transactions. Essentially she worked for free for a week on that one, because she lost all her tips, which were on the credit card receipts, and they made her reimburse in cash for the meals. After she quit, it turned out another waitress found her receipts and turned them in as her own to get the tips.

@breedmitch I assume high cost of living—> high food prices—> more tip no matter what the percent is.

@BarnacleBill Fair enough. If you do it for ease of calculation thats different from saying 20% is fair and 15% is not fair.

I understand that waiting tables is tough and that the tip is considered essential. Thats why I will increase the tip up for either a) good service or b) normal service on a very busy day. Conversely, I will reduce the tip for bad service (at least for bad service on a slow day).

In any event, I’m given to understand that 15% is “standard” so my point is that the other people putting in $3.00 is fine.

I think serving staff should all be paid a decent wage and benefits, like the proper and honourable job it is, and the rules of tipping be less stringent and offered in a spirit of ‘gratuity’ and not ‘entitlement’ it’s become. I think a tip is always based on how you thought the service was and the value of the meal only a guideline as to the amount.

@cazzie – it would seem Mr. Pink agrees. ~

(cussing in link, if you’re at work with speakers)

@funkdaddy mr pink is an idiot if he thinks they get minimum wage. It’s different for waiting staff in most states because the broken system and their bosses is allowed to base their wage on some notion that they will ‘make it TO’ minimum wage on their tips. It’s bullshit. I tip when I’m in these ‘broken systems’ and I tip well. To me, the service is always better than what I’m used to and the food is always cheaper than what I’m use to, so I hope that the underpaid waiting staff gets to keep what I leave them.

@funkdaddy Classic, but also factually incorrect. I’m with @cazzie on the pay them decently and let the tips be for extra good service. Race to the top!