If you could create your own Fluther awards, what would they be?

You get GQ for effort. Dayum.

Oh great one, you are so creative.

Tide Pool
Cheese and Jelly
Meet a Jelly IRL (Pics or it didn’t happen)
20,000 Leagues
Can’t touch this
Don’t get modded for a whole year!
Party Dog
Get 69 lurve on a 10K thread
Atlantis
GOD-LIKE
Get 100,000 lurve

I’d create one for good vocabulary and puntuation.

@queenie You wouldn’t get that one, because you spelled “punctuation” wrong! :P Hahahahahaha.

AHAHAHAHA

@Michael_Huntington Very nice. :)

I did that on purpose…...I did!

@queenie Sureeeeeeee. :P

The Blowhole Award: for making a comment so funny that at least one person responded that they spit out milk or wine or whatever they were drinking when they read the comment.

The Arrrggghhh Award: for getting your responses modded off at least twice in one day.

The Life Preserver Award: for having a jelly suggest to the OP that they talk to another specific jelly (to whom the award would go) because they are an expert or at least very helpful with the subject matter and can probably help.

The Mermaid Award: given to a jelly who has honestly answered a question, that was not naughty or suggestive, but the answer sounded deliciously naughty, even though it wasn’t.

@Kardamom I like those : )

@Kardamom Love your first and last. :) I know I’d get the Blowhole award haha. Maybe the Mermaid one, too. >_> :D

I would really like to achieve the Filthy Whore award, but if I can’t get that many people to add me, am I just a whore?

Tide Pool

-The Bends
Post a comment on a new question, less than 30 seconds after the question was posted

-Suckerfish
Get rickrolled by another jelly

-Blowfish
Post “I’m 19 and a male” on 20 consecutive questions

-Jelly Killer
Request that one of your own questions be removed

Coral Reef

-Chatty Cathy
Post 5000 comments

-Jelly Savior
Convert a fellow jelly to your religion

-Jelly Stalker
Follow 200 jellies

20,000 Leagues

-Salty Dog
You’ve been an active member for 3 years

-Deep Sea Diver
Answer a question over 2 years old with 5 Great Answers

Atlantis

-Whippersnapper
Mail a whip to Fluther HQ, addressed to Auggie

@Vunessuh Aww, don’t say that!

You’re also cheap.

XD

@WillWorkForChocolate Damn man, those are damn good. LOL @ Chatty Cathy and Jelly Savior.

Ya know…on this site, most of those are plausible…:D

@Vunessuh You’ll always be my special little whore. :)

@Symbeline Thanks sweetie! I had fun thinkin’ em up.

If you got others, I wanna hear em. :)

I just thought of another…

20,000 Leagues
Because I WALK THE PLANK!!
Have conversed with @bob_ and didn’t mention anything about sandwiches.

The Milo Award for being added to gailcalled’s Fluther.

ain’t gonna happen, just sayin’... meow

The Addict
For gaining 1,000 lurve in one day.

Spatula Spanker
You’ve been followed by Vunessuh

Happy About Brownies
You’ve been followed by Coloma

Hahaha awesome. Spatulas. So true. :D

What’s this about Coloma now? Does she need a slurpy with those?

…haha, now I need to think up an award about inside jokes that just go on for too long and no longer make any sense. XD

Plaid Pants (I believe that was the inside joke.)
For having a profile picture of you with plaid pants on.

@KatetheGreat If it isn’t an inside joke on here yet, or at least a meme, it should be. :D

@Symbeline It’s a well-known meme on here! Just made sure.

The Raunchy Bastard
For making 20 dirty comments on one thread.

The Calls Are Coming From Inside The House
Awarded for viewing a profile for someone you are not following 50 times.

In Your Eyes
Get unfollowed by someone, then convince them to follow you once more.

Scalphunter
Max out all the Lurve for 100 people.

It is late and my creativity is kaput

@Joker94 Your kaput creativity is fucking awesome. I LOOOOOOVE your first one. :)

Bag Of Dicks
Ask a question picked “Question Of The Day”

Urinating on a Jellyfish Sting
Awarded for not being modded for 1 year.

Pull My Finger
Correctly interpet 5 dreams, solve 5 relationships, and correctly diagnose 5 medical ailments without killing anyone involved.

@filmfann Pull My Finger is priceless. Sure you never been on Answerbag before lol?

@KatetheGreat I think most of us would win that! Nice. :)

The Pastrami Express
Ask a “deep” question that @bob_ answers with a one-liner that gets 5 GAs.

The Threesome (not to be mistaken for the Coral Reef)

You’ve asked your three questions, now go have a smoke and go to bed.

I love this thread.

The Lurker ^^

Followed 20 questions without actually participating in them.

The Clownfish

Write a funny one-liner that has the next poster write LOL.

@Symbeline Thanks you! :D

The Eve Award
For having 3 or more active accounts.

The Chameleon Award
For changing one’s avatar at least once a day.

The Lon Chaney Award
For having 3 or more pics in the Phluther Photobucket.

The Mel Gibson Award
For posting at least one misogynic, racist, or homophobic question a week.

@Brian1946 ^^ Nice!

The Belly up Jelly award for quitting and rejoining Fluther more than 5 times.

The Rock Castle award for being temporarily banned from Fluther.

The Octopus

For replying to 5 questions within 3 minutes.

Jelly Nerd

Has viewed each page at the bottom of Fluther at least once.

Lurvin’ It Up

Gained more than 100 lurve in one day.

@AmWiser Naw, an award for being temporarily banned would be much too easy. I could get myself banned super fast, LOL.

@augustlan Haha nice. That person to get that award would be me creepy though haha. Those other ones should be awards. I bet it happened before!

@Brian1946 Haha damn, those are good. Mel Gibson award LOL. Those other ones should be awards. I bet it happened before!

@seazen_ I think I’d get that one often, and I believe some of them would be your fault. :D
Also you’d totally get the Belly Up Jelly award.

@KatetheGreat LOL nice. For some reason I’m picturing an octopus using the computer and going all hyper haha.

@erichw1504 Image Attribution for the win!

@AmWiser lmao an award for being banned. XD

I thought up more;

Tide Pool
Ghosts of Internets Past
Linked ’‘Googoth’’ account.

Al Gore
Linked Yahoo Messenger account.

Black Sheep Imperative
Never followed anyone for a year.

Coral Reef
Dead Man Floating
Have reached 1000 Lurve but have not been followed by a single user.

Down the Road, not Across the Street
Received no GA’s after answering 50 questions.

Master Handles Bait
Have tried adding yourself to your own Fluther 69 times.

20,000 Leagues
Godhand
Have created 300 Fluther topics.

Agatha Christie
Used the search feature 100 times.

Pit of Zombies
Have 30 answers that all have the exact same amount of words.

Atlantis
To Infinity, and Beyond
What took so long to get to level three, or were you scared to finally find me? Have obtained every single award.

Trick or Treat
This is not Easter! Has clicked on every first question of every Halloween day since Fluther has been up.

Drink Up, Judah Benhur
Your good deeds have not gone unnoticed.
Sent @Symbeline a bottle of beer through the mail.

I think I’m running outta juice…

Lord Shiva
Host a bunch of 10k and 20k parties, while no one knows who the fuck you are.

The Big Meanie

Posting an insulting response to a question and getting 5 GA’s for it.

@filmfann lmao XD

@KatetheGreat Man I’d ditch if that was an actual award. XD

The Clown

For posting a totally irrelevant picture with 20 of your responses.

“Jaws IV
You traveled so far, we had to give you something. If you meet one of the staff members or moderators in real life and say the word ’‘rosebud’’, they have to give you this award next time they go on Fluther.”

Has anyone actually met a mod or staff in real life and wouldn’t they think I was crazy for looking at them and saying “rosebud”????????

Fatal attraction
You write a serious question and it turns outs about 50 joke post.

@Season_of_Fall Probably. But then they’d figure out you’re from Fluther. It’s normal that we’re all crazy here. Especially @KatetheGreat She’s nuts! You’re nuts I tell you! :D

I am! And I take pride in it! Bursts out into crazy dance.

That’s deh spirit yo.

@WillWorkForChocolate
“jelly savior”...hahah

@Symbeline Man, you’re good at this stuff!

@Season_of_Fall I’ve met 2 jellies (well, 7, if you count my 3 daughters and my 2 high school friends). I’ll be meeting two more in two months! No one has said “Rosebud” just yet… I’ll be waiting. :D

Worshipper:You meet augustaln in real life and kiss her shoes as soon as yous ee her

XD

The Perfecto-OCD-Fish

Getting the Perfecto award three times in a row.

The Eddie Murphy circa RAW award

For using more expletives and curses than words in a post.

(Three Eddie’s award you an Andrew Dice Clayfish)

The School-of-fish award

Awarded once only to student newbies who do not ask a homework question.

The To Err is Human, to Arrr is Pirate award

Posting anything Johnny Depp related.

The CuddleFish award

First time boyfriend question.

The Somewhere beyond the Sea award

When a jelly refers to his old social networks in a nostalgiac way.

Daydream Nation
Posted more than three questions about dreams.

Drama Queen of Atlantis
Posted more than three questions about relationships.

School of Jellyfish
Posted more than three questions about homework.

Torrid waters
Sent (or received) a nude pic to (from) a fellow Jelly.

Deepwater drilling
Had sex (or cybersex) with a fellow Jelly.

Original Jelly
Has over 10k lurve but has always used one of the provided avatars.

Deep Sea Diving
Answered over 5 questions from over two years ago.

Ice Fishing
Only answered questions from one section of Fluther for a day.

Atlantis – Peanut Butter and Jellyfish

Have you ever?

Love Machine Home Edition

Asks more than 5 NSFW questions a week.

Love Machine Professional

Posts more than 10 answers per NSFW question.

Ron Jellemy
Asked more than 20 NSFW questions.

@seazen_ Then I should already have the To Err is Human, to Arrr is Pirate award! Several times! Johnny Depp, Johnny Depp, Johnny Depp.

@KatetheGreat I really like the idea of your clown award.

Seaweed in my Pants
Posted less than 5 responsed in one week or only asked one question in one month.

The King Neptune Award: for anyone that posts an extremely provacative question and then asks not to be judged.

The Starry Eyed Starfish Award: for anyone that asks a question, recieves many correct and helpful answers and then screeches at everyone that they’re not being helpful.
Bonus award points to to any questioner who is actually an adult who does this.

The Fishbone Award: to anyone who asks how to lose lots of weight rapidly or how to diet down to an unhealthy weight while claiming that is is not an unhealthy weight and having no medical information to back up that claim.

The Salmon Migration Award: to anyone who re-posts almost the exact same question, worded in a slightly different manner, to try to elicit different responses than the ones that they got on the other question(s).

The Lighthouse, Camera, Action Award: to anyone who posts a question asking us for all of the details for his/her movie, show, play or book, without having any premise, story, writing, characters, setting, mood, or theme that they’ve written by themselves (other than a random nebulous idea that seems to have been done before).
Bonus points if you get another Jelly to repeatedly ask the same similar questions.

The Jellyfish Sting Award: for anyone who actually posts a picture of their mysterious rash.

The Mermaid/Merman Award: to any Jelly who is able to convince a skeptic that males wearing dresses, men that paint their nails or wear makeup, or guys who like guys will not go straight to hell or disrupt the fabric of the American culture or bring about the end of civilization.
Bonus points if the jelly can simply convince the skeptic that any of these activities will not impede the skeptic’s own marriage.

The Fibber McGee Fisherman Award: Who asks a seemingly heartfelt relationship question, because they are so heartbroken under one avatar, then accidentally admit to one or more infidelities, youthful indescretions or downright dawg-ery under another avatar.
Bonus points to the Jelly who rats out this person as lying two-timer.
Extra bonus points if both Skype and Facebook was involved.

School of Jellyfish
Get five or more responses modded because of bad grammar.

Curious George
Asked 21 questions in one week.

Treasured Question
Ask a question that is featured as “question of the day” on Facebook.

Fishing with the Wrong Bait: For using straw man arguments X number of times (maybe in one thread?).

Too Much Wind

For writing an extremely long description to a question.

@augustlan Haha thanks. I actually worked kinda hard at it. XD

@seazen_ ’‘The Eddie Murphy circa RAW’’
Sounds like my kind of award! Also, the Johnny Depp award is damn awesome. I laughed. :)

@erichw1504 You got some pretty good ones. Treasured Question, Seaweed, Original Jelly and Ice Fishing I especially like…but nothing fuckin beats Ron Jellemy lmao, awesome.

@Kardamom Your Starry Eyed one is scary…because it has happened. Although a lot more on dumps like AB than here. Fishbone is so true too…but less depressing. XD Actually all your awards seem to pertain to reoccurring online behaviours. And yeah, post that rash! We wanna see!...nice work. We need a new award for you…

One of those Episodes that shows parts of older Episodes
Has seen it all.

@incendiary_dan If someone can pull that off without being called on their shit, it should definitely be an award. XD

@KatetheGreat Haha yeah. We need a similar one for answers, too. ^^

Michael Jackson’s Fascination With Children

Sire 5 Orphan questions.

@filmfann You’re fucking disgusting.

GA, love it. :)

Jellyfish Up Your As$
All answers sounded grumpy for 24 hours.

What the Jellyf!sh?!
Received a Great Answer for something that made no sense what-so-ever.

Silly Jellyfish, Tricks are for Kids
Very often acts way too young for their age.

@erichw1504 Guess who that one would go to….

@queenie You!

Queen Jellyfish
Is currently following @queenie.

Smelly Jelly
Good God, what’s that smell?!

@erichw1504 Gee, thanks ^_^

@queenie That last one would also go to you.

@erichw1504 Speak for yourself smelly boy! ; P
Pheeew!

~~~~~~~ @erichw1504 just got the Smelly Jelly award. 60 seconds ago ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You win @queenie.

@erichw1504 I think I’ve gone deaf/blind….ugh.
You win. ^-^

Stick to the Sticks
We got this man, we got this by the ass! Every single one of your answers or questions has the word zombie in it.

if anyone knows what this award refers to, I’ll be happy ^^

@Symbeline Dawn of the Dead, amirite?

It’s a Metaphor

For stating vague references or metaphors in each of your responses.

Forever Alone
Close discussion on a question you asked before getting a single answer.

Guns. Lots of Guns
Ask more than 5 questions with “War” listed as a topic

At the Movies
Get GA’d on a movie recommendation thread more than 10 times.

Love Bug

For acting suggestive or flirty with others on Fluther.

I’m pretty sure most of us would have that xD

@KatetheGreat Oh hell yeah. :) And I’d totally get your It’s a Metaphor award, because most of the ones I made are vague references. (more so than metaphors, but eh)

And yeah, the Love Bug award here would be automatic to everyone. XD

@Joker94 Good ones. I like these because technically, they could work lol.

I just want to say that you guys have gone off topic completely – in the sense that Fluther awards should be sea related. Otherwise, the’d be just awards. And it’s pretty easy (and silly) to come up with just awards.

@seazen_ Oops! Thanks for pointing that out.

Anal Anemone

For complaining about younger jellies on Fluther.

@seazen_ Nah, I said in my details that sea related themes weren’t mandatory. :)

I Can Hear the Ocean Award: for people who ask an interesting question, get a ton of really great answers, but then never come back and let us know what they decided to do. Leaving us all asking, did he/she leave the Fluther, because I don’t hear anything.

The Seafood Award: to anyone who asks a simple question about what dish to fix for dinner, that starts and avalanche of a thread and everyone ends up hungry.

The Incredible Mr. Limpet Award: to anyone who asks a question about some nostalgic thing from their childhood and makes everyone get all weepy when they start recalling all of their own nostalgic items that have long since been given away or lost.

The Underwater Volcano Award: to anyone who seriously derails another jelly’s thread.

The Oh Say Can You Sea? Award: to any jellys who come up with an awesome playlist for a question asking for good songs.

The Seaweed Award: To anyone who gives some reall great, knowledgeable answers about plants, and growing things. Extra points to those who know what plants grow well in particular climate zones.

@seazen was just awarded the golden Anal Anemone

…again and again and again.

If I had a dollar for every time I got that award…

@KatetheGreat Uh, you are the younger jelly on fluther.

@seazen_ Have you seen the abundant amount of 13 year olds around here lately?

I didn’t say the youngest, I said the younger.

@KatetheGreat you’re 13?!

@KatetheGreat What wid all O’ em preggers, layshi-ships and shit inquiri-ahs boots dem aul O’ dem sell funs, I believes ah ahs!

@dxs Nope. I’m 18. Although, I wish I was still 13! Hahaha.

@Symbeline Can you simplify that? I’m not THAT good at understanding English yet!

Oh ok I was gonna say, you didn’t seem it

@seazen_ Ahh, I gotcha!

To clarify, we’re all totally cool with 16 year olds, right? >.>

@Joker94 I’m 15

Yeah I’m just being an idiot, dun worry about me lol

@Symbeline Hey, you’re not an idiot! I bet it was funny!

@dxs We must all hang together, or assuredly we shall all hang seperately…

I’m fine with 13,15, 16 and 18 year olds – as long as they state their age when posting questions about their boobs. So I can avoid them.

@seazen_ Hahaha, wasn’t that you that was asking for pics of queenie’s boobs earlier? AHAHAHA.

Exactly.

Did somebody say 18?

I ain’t got no kids.

LEGAL NOTICE: COMMENT SHOULD BE TAKEN AS JOKE AND NOT AS CONTRACTUAL OBLIGATION OR OFFERING. GUARANTEE VOID WHERE PROHIBITED. NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.

Whoa, what’s with the graveyard up there?

Call of Jelly: Green Ops
All questions asked in the past week have been games.

What happened? Was it me? What’d I do? Why’d it get moderated?

Was that some weird conversation about underage boobs that got moderated up there? I’m only asking because ages and boobs were mentioned directly beforehand…

They flagged themselves I’m guessing.^^

Jellyphile
Modded for indecent remark about underage boobs.

Now that was funny.

Tagathon
For adding over 20 tags to your question.

@everephebe Perhaps there should be a flogging instead of a flagging? :P

@erichw1504 I could definitely get the Tagathon award…

Hey you guys! Stop obsessing over my boobs! They’re not that nice…

@WillWorkForChocolate
Me too, I think. (exagerration)
I try to tag as much as I can think of, as I feel the more tagged, the more [Fluther demonym] will come.

Suicide Dolls
Stop following every single question you ever posted.

@Symbeline
I have yet to unfollow a single question whether by me or someone else, to the best of my knowledge. Is there any overload limit? Should I get cracking at that?

@Symbeline I do that after a while!

@dxs No overload limit as far as I know. I’m pretty sure you’re safe. :)

@KatetheGreat Your avatar is awesome. :D

@Symbeline Thanks :)

Jellincarnation
Deleted your account only to create a new one under a similar username.

The Sea Slug Award: to anyone who thanks us all for our great advice on how to get out of a relationship with a (thug, abuser, jerk, douche, cheater etc.) but then chooses to stay with him anyway.

Motion in the Ocean Award: for anyone who comes up with a “new” sexual technique that both men and women like and is able to explain it succinctly enough that we can all understand how it works, without being too graphic or rude.

Floatation Device Award: to anyone who comes up with the best, or winning answer, for someone who has asked a question seeking or “floating” ideas for a good name for their book or a character in one of their stories.

The Siren Song Award: for anyone who types out a 1,000 word question to ask us how to talk to people.

LOL that Siren one is hilarious. :D

Octopus Award : for the jelly who answers and follows eight questions in one day.

The Takes This Site Too Fucking Seriously Award: following a user and then unfollowing them when they piss you off and then following them again when you make up and so on and so forth.

The Thinking Anyone Gives A Shit Award: making a grand announcement on your profile page that you’re taking a break possibly permanently because you’re really disappointed in the collective.

Haha, stupid online. Love your awards. :)

Those were fantastic :D

I unfollowed you for that.

The Yarnlady

For being in the original YARNLADY chat scheme, changing your profile picture, and posting incessant replies about yarn.

The Drunken Squirrel

For actually asking a question about making that damned squirrel a scarf.

Hog of the Water Hole

For staying in the Water Hole for an entire night, just as KatetheGreat did during the YARNPOCALYPSE*

That’s right, I did it.

These are one of a kind awards!

@Symbeline Reserved for the finest of drunken jellies!

Sea Yarn
Write a 1000 character response without cussing.

@filmfann That’s fuc That’s too da How in the he I can’t.

Uh, did I miss something over night? How come so many avatars look like @yarnlady?

I hope you guys aren’t being mean.

@Kardamom
Lol, no. I was just as confused this morning when I logged in. Hope fully you’ll find the answer here. : )

Thanks @queenie Now I see what went on last night. Sounds like everybody had a great time, even Yarnlady herself!

At first I thought I was losing my mind.

I guess Auggie will have to figure out a way to put all of those late night chenanigans into her “highlights” book.

Fluther is one big highlights book.

Drawn Out Jelly
Write a 2,500+ character response that could have been written in 100.

Drawn out Jelly lite

Agreeing with the Jelly above you in a long, 100 word post – instead of just saying Word.

Shell Game

Don’t show up to your 10K or 20K celebration thread. (I’m looking at you, @john65pennington)

Above and Beyond

Sends a gift to @augustlan.

A jelly sent me a whip in the mail! It has rhinestones on it and everything. :D

@augustlan I have a gift I am mailing out to you soon

@XOIIO Ack! You’re underage, boy! :p

I just threw up a little.

@augustlan Okay, so look for a small box.

Lmao.

@filmfan I’m using the box that our fridge came in

Jelly Burn

Get burned by another jelly. (I’m looking at you @XOIIO)

@augustlan Woohoo!

LOL I thought I might get some conversation going with that one XD

Cheap Cologne Award

For the jelly who makes all the other jellies in chat run away, due to the smell.
(looking at you @erichw1504)

I could possibly win that one, haha.

@Symbeline Of course, but with you it’d be something like the smell of dead bodies. Hahahahaha.

Or the cologne would be to cover the smell of bodies.

Aaaah, I love the smell of putrefaction in the morning.

Jailbait

That would be more for that Michael Jackson award.

@queenie But, I was wearing Sex Panther!

@erichw1504 no wonder… (((sighs)))

River Carp for the biggest trolls.

The Sea Cucumber Award for sharing the best recipe in the whole Fluther universe. Any contenders?

The Pearl Award to someone who provides enough answers, like putting tiny little grains of sand into an oyster, until the OP finally gains a pearl of wisdom for themselves.

The Squid Ink Award for someone who writes a question, then writes another question that is almost identical, then another one, and then another and then tries to cover it up.

The Floating Strands of Seaweed Award to the person that comes up with the funniest remark about Yarn.

The Smooth Sailing Award to any Fluther who posts a question about religion in such a way that all of the responses are not only informative, on task, and have no sense of mean-ness or any attempts by anyone to convert anyone else.

The Spyglass Award to any Fluther who posts and awesome list of movies or books for us all to check out. You know who you are @filmfan.

The Paradox Award – Earned the paradox award
The Monopoly Award – When a question has 20 answers, more than 50% of them are yours.
The Hypocrite Award – Awarded when a user writes a question, requests it to be removed, and then asks the same question again.
The Textbook Award – Write a massive answer, with over 1,000 characters words.
The Addict Award – Log on and off Fluther at least 30 times in one day.

@PhiNotPi Wonderful!

Also, the Split Personality Award – When you start your answer with a @ followed by your own username, and talk to yourself like another person.

For Example:
@PhiNotPi Why didn’t you include the Split Personality Award on your original list? You’re such an idiot.

How about a grand in cash if you ask a thousand questions?
£££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££££...ahh fuck it, was going to do a thousand but my finger hurts :D

I’ll help;

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Note; I denno how many are in here. XD

Jesus, you really musta pound that key :D

Copya n’ pastah, baby!

Heehee, this feels like a time machine, three years in the past.
Why, I do declare Miss @Symbeline, you look so young & perdy!

Three years? Oh wow, yeah…haha, 2011. Back when we were hot young Spring chickens!

Yeah & unlike a chicken, time flies.

Write in my own Fluther awards, huh? I have thought of this time to time. If I were to add or create some Fluther awards they would be:

• Rip Van Winkle for the Flutheronian who reappears after 180 days dormant.
• Irukanji going more than 6 straight questions without a GQ.
• Hand shaker for greeting the most new Flutheronians within the first 36 hours of their membership in the Lagoon.
• Buck Rodgers for getting to the 10k mansion under 18 months from the creation date of their membership.
• Cotton candy for asking 5+ “fluff” questions in a row.
• Luca Brasi for giving more than 50 support lurve in one month.
• Lemon twist having more than 4 “Oliver Twist awards”
• Zombiator by being logon continuously for 72 straight hours

Those would be some of the awards I would add.