How do I effectively punish misbehavior and disrespect from students at an after-school center?

Time outs can be used at any age, you just add a minute for every year. Its the safest and most effective way to get results. Kids need to learn consequences for their actions and doing a proper time out gives them that.

Concentrate on rewarding good behavior rather than punishing bad behavior. One way or the other, examples will be set. Which examples do you want them to follow?

Embarrassing them in front of peers will only promote bad behavior. The punishment will become a crown they’ll all want to wear, testing the waters of teenage daring and boldness, every one of them hoping to get the attention as the one who bravely challenged authority and survived.

Don’t give them the opportunity to challenge authority. Give them the opportunity to achieve reward.

How about having a continuous program of exhausting activities that might distract them from behaving badly and if they deviate then just like @creative1 said, time for time outs?

How about kicking their butts out the door?

You guys are there for their entertainment and they are abusing you.

If they give you more problems, call the police.

Do not let the actions of a few spoil the good times for the other kids.

Hm, I can think of using time out but it depends… I may not be able to watch them during time-out, which means they can up and leave and act out all they want (we are quite under-staffed there). I may be able to put them in a corner in the office and have someone watch them in there.
And good point @RealEyesRealizeRealLies . I try real hard not to embarrass them in front of others, but often times, I have to handle their behavior right there and then, which means some might have to watch. I try to do a lot of one-on-one conversations about their behavior, but it is NOT working :/
@mazingerz88, Not sure what you mean by “a continuous program of exhausting activities”. Can you clarify? We do have them play sports outside and take nature walks, since we are by a river.
@john65pennington , I have most definitely kicked their butts out the door. It can be hard to at times, because they tend to come right on back, or linger around the front of the property. I guess I forgot to mention that these kids are living in one of the lowest income neighborhoods in our city. So I try to avoid police, as I don’t want to get them started on that stuff early.

Are the kids required to be there or do they come voluntarily? This will have some impact about how you handle the above situations…

Revise your program. It’s obviously not that interesting to them. When it comes to getting the full cooperative attention of modern youth, we face a tremendous amount of competition these days.

Conduct your events dressed as Evil Clowns and pass out dirty rags as reward for bad behavior. Give them a reason, any reason, to take interest in your program.

How old are these kids?

Glow, I have had calls on just this type of situation. Some kids do not understand or accept the word “no”. Its not in their vocabulary. You are the authority figure and its up to you to protect all the kids, not just the arrogant ones.

Make a phone call and talk to your local beat officer. He will gladly assist you in dealing with arrongant children.

Its the majority thats needs protecting by you, not just a few snotty nosed kids.

@yankeetooter – They are not required to come, but they are required to register and the program is free (non-profit).
@RealEyesRealizeRealLies – I don’t know about the evil clown thing…. but im, these kids range from 3rd grade to 9th.
@john65pennington – Well, i am just afraid of making them fear the police, as in this nieghborhood, they do fear the police, in a negative way. I would rather they look at the police as a positive thing, rather than something that is there to put disobedient kids in line. It’s a last resort, like if there is any real physical hurtful fighting.

So, @Glow, if coming is a privilege, perhaps the threat of the loss of the privilege would help…

Separate the older kids from one another, making them leaders of multiple groups of younger children. Give them responsibility, and reward system accountable to their performance as group leader. The younger kids will obey and respect the older kids more than the instructors too. And since the older kids are separated from and competitive with one another, they won’t be so inclined to show off with bad behavior.

Have it so the older kids get to assign specific positions of responsibility down to the younger kids within their group. People want a hierarchy and responsibility.

Don’t be afraid to call the cops and tresspass the chronic miscreants. Like @john65pennington said, you are responsible for the safety and welfare of all the kids there. If you wait until the damage is done, it could ruin your life as well as the lives of the kids you serve.

I agree with @RealEyesRealizeRealLies that it seems you need a change of programs. I’m no expert but I’m sure there are fun activities the kids could do aside from physical sports, like learning how to play chess or let them act a simple play. Maybe they could come up with their own idea, write it and perform it without any props, just dialogue and imagination. Or doing a singing contest ala American Idol. Anything to keep their minds and bodies moving. Distract and surprise them with unfamiliar gimmicky activities that in reality are productive mentally. Maybe read a book and have them replaced a word of their choice with the word zombie or something else. Maybe they will settle down maybe they won’t but I guess it’s still something.

Okay, go with the flow….glow.

I’ve worked in a school for adolescents with behavioral problems for 23 years. Take a look at our website and you might find some good tips (look under the “We Use What Works” section.)

One of the secrets here is focusing less on the punishment and more on the reward. What is the function of the obnoxious behavior? What more socially-appropriate behavior could replace the obnoxious one? And are the kids getting specific, direct praise when they do something right? If you aren’t giving out at least four praise statements for every reprimand, there’s a problem.

Oh- and to expand on RealEyes last point, which is a great one- it should be the kids that are the biggest pains that you keep busy with tasks like supervision. A lot of times only the “good kids” get such privileges.

If this neighborhood is really as bad as claimed, then the cops are more afraid of the community than the community is afraid of the cops.

Think about it… At 13 years old, these kids are already disrespecting authority in small group social structures. Bringing in the cops will only take them to the next level, learning to disrespect law enforcement. Why? Because the police can’t really do anything serious to a 13 year old. What are they gonna do, take them to the station and have their parents come get them? You could do that without the cops, and you wouldn’t be teaching the kids that nothing serious happens when the police show up.

I’d certainly be careful with kicking kids out of the program at 13 years old. I’m fully responsible for the safety of every child I’m dealing with, specifically 11 to 13 year old boys from the inner city. Their parents won’t take them to baseball practice, so I have to go and pick them up. I can’t imagine kicking one out on his own. What would I say to a parent calling to know where their child was?

If your group is boys and girls… THEN SEPARATE THEM IMMEDIATELY. They’ll both show off for the other way too much, and they aren’t necessarily interested in the same things either.

Follow John Hunter’s lead and get them to play The World Peace Game. The youth are very capable if stimulated properly.

I agree with most of what RealEyesRealizeRealLies and crisw have said, particularly about the World Peace Game, which is incredible. I’m not sure about separating the boys and girls though.

Seems like I am getting some great answers. Thanks so far guys! It’s my bed time, so I will come back in the morning to gather it all :)

I work with kids too and I agree with crisw and Realeyez. I avoid anything that comes across as ‘punishment’ because today’s kids do seem to think punishment is funny because it’s a way for them to push the adult’s buttons, so I try to develop rapport instead. Often when there’s a strong rapport, just saying “Come on guys,” does the trick. That takes away the power struggle and let’s them feel an ownership for their behavior and relationships.
I also agree with the activities and distractions. If the activity is relevant to their lives or futures, they’re way more interested. You might have to explain to them how the activity is relevant or important to their lives, but once they see that participating as a direct benefit, they’re usually involved and self-regulate the kids who disrupt their focus.
Hats off to you—volunteering to work with these kids. I’m impressed.
And, one more thing… choose your battles. I’ve learned to focus on the big things first, then as that is taken care of, work my way towards the smaller things. Cussing is small potatoes compared to walking out, getting physical, etc.

How old is the oldest and the youngest in your @Glow? How much older than the oldest are you and the other volunteers?

@john65pennington I’d be really careful about labeling behavior as abuse so quickly. The physical stuff, yes – but then they’re being abusive to others, not the teacher (unless I misunderstood). But telling a kid that they’re abusive, when most of society represents abuse as coming in one shade only – severe physical – doesn’t really send the message that their behavior was inappropriate and they should stop it; it sends the message that they are bad and there’s nothing they can do about it. And involving the police should really be a last resort – once you involve the police, it has to stop things permanently, otherwise they’ll just find ways to make sure the police aren’t involved, and I really doubt that either way the students will come out with a positive view of the police.

There should be an organization or state agency that has training on how to deal with teens in this setting. See if you can find them and schedule some training sessions for the staff.

The mentoring program I am in had 3 full weekends of training for us, and we usually just see individual kids for 2–3 hours a week. We didn’t get to meet the kids until after we had completed the training.

One thing you can try is figure out who has the most respect in the group and make them in charge of the younger ones with some perks. Also give them a lot of praise. Like thanks, you are an awesome kid and I can see the other kids respect you and take some snacks in and give it to them for helping out. Something you know they would like. Talk to their parents and give them praise for their little accomplishments. But be sincere. Don’t just make up crap. The kids will feel you trust and value them and will return the favor in kind. Most teens just feel they aren’t listened too and that everyone gives orders and demands respect but they don’t give it back.
Most of the time they want to be treated like adults. They are often told they useless or don’t know what they are talking about and although it may be true at times it won’t get corrected by only pushing them around. You have to get to know them better as people and not just faces in a room. Not saying you guys are doing that but that is how they will feel and they can usually pick up when people are fustrated and tired of them.

Do you get any kind of budget? You could do some team building exercises, take them out to laser skirmish, or something of the sort so while they are having fun they still have to learn to work as a team and maybe they will gain respect for each other.

If you did not already, post a list of rules. Keep the list short and the requirements simple. 1. Show respect to others even if you do not like or agree with them. 2. Check in and out of the premises. These are examples and not necessarily what you should use. Discuss the rules with them. Particularly the respect rule as it is wide open to interpretation; let them give examples of what showing respect means. It seems most of their behavior is lack of respect for themselves, others and property. Let them know what the punishment will be. Have a guideline of what will cause them to be removed from the program i.e. so many infractions, certain behaviors. Stick to your guidelines and notify parents of infractions which impact acceptance into the program. I realize you want everyone to be able to remain in the program, but it is better to have 20 kids in the program you are actually helping than 30 if 10 of them are causing major problems and keeping the others from actually flourishing.

I really like what @RealEyesRealizeRealLies said about giving them responsibilities. Kids need responsibilities and real rules they can comprehend. They perform better within a structure (not too stiff of a structure). I would also guess many of them do not have a lot of structure in their home life based upon their behavior. You will meet resistance. Give a lot of praise in public, reprimand in private.

In these cases, the only thing you can do because these are not your own children and they are minors is to find clever ways to deflect and redirect the negative energy. These kids have pent up, fruestrations, attitudes and problems that the fact they are in an after school program allude to all of the above.

*Meaning nothing more really than absent parenting because of work hours some single parent households which always have their own unique stress and other issues.

By a diversion, I mean you have to watch what the kids are doing and learn to counteract that behavior not by punishment or correction but by being creative and coming up with other ways to distract them, as well as incorporate the activities they are acting out in only as a positive channel.

You can line them up and have contests with little prizes as rewards
*Who can be the loudest, the fastest, the smartest, the most creative?

Have rap contests, give them all paper and pen and ask them to write raps out on specific topics and then have them perform the raps in front of their peers.

Kids have very active bodies and very active minds and without a channel that vent their boredom and fruestration into positive channels they will act out like demons. It’s just a fact.