Is the baring of skin always sexual? At what point, if ever, does it become necessarily sexual?

The littler a child is, the less “skin” means. We all know toddlers who are happiest when naked.

Yet in some cultures they will even sexualize a toddler. One of my English students (from an Arab culture) was dismayed to find her baby cousin’s picture “improved” by replacing her hand with that of an older child whose nails had been painted. Of course it was pretty obvious because the new hand was large enough it made the picture look strange. We guess it made the photographer happy, even if the family who paid for the picture wasn’t. This picture was made in that country, so it was not possible to ask for their money back, or for the picture to be restored to the original.

It’s only sexual because we make it sexual, hence no one having perverted thoughts when they see naked babies on TV. Our body isn’t different than any other species without clothes. It’s just a body. We made it more sexual whenever humans started wearing clothes and we had to start wondering what people looked like naked?

No,it is not always sexual.
Art school models never did anything for me and some of those men were very nice looking with incredible builds.
Some people make it that way.

At what point skin baring becomes sexual would likely depend on where and how it is done and who is looking. I listened once to four American and European teens discussing nudity in the beach. The difference in their opinions was not cultural, it was by gender. The boys think beach nudity is sexual while the girls think it was all about getting the perfect tan. Skin is sexualized in the US quite strongly because it sells and marketing in this heavily capitalistic society penetrates our collective consciousness, whether we are aware or not.

@wundayatta I have a lesbian friend who often wears very little—but something tells me she’s not trying to attract males with her display of skin. It’s not always about us, you know.

Not for me. Nudity is just that….a naked person. The only time someones nakedness becomes sexual is when I have made a conscious choice to be intimate with that person and ironically that decision or choice is almost always made while the woman is fully clothed!

Not sure what you mean by At what point, if ever, does it become necessarily sexual?, or did you mean “at one point does it necessarily become sexual?”

For me, I find the midriff, the belly buttom if you will, to be one of the most erogenous and sexual areas. It automatically catches my eye. I can’t see it and not have a sexual thought, I think.

I agree with the others that it’s not always sexual because it depends on which part of the body is shown, it depends on the age of the person, etc. But gee…guess which areas of skin shown are often seen as the most sexual? The parts that are most often covered by clothes. It’s the fact that we cover parts of our body with clothes so often and made certain areas taboo that make them sexualized; obviously there are some parts of the body that are biologically sexual, but I have no doubt that there would be less sexualization of the body if clothing was much more scanty.

That said, I’m not one of those people that thinks others exposing skin are “asking for” sex, but chances are if I see some attractive guy’s Apollo’s belt, I’m going to be drooling over it…

I think it is situational. Bathing suit at the beach, doesn’t seem very bare and sexual. Walk into a restaurant with just a bathing suit on and you appear almost naked. Bikini doesn’t have to be sexual, but bra and panties, sexual.

@zen Very interesting. I never thought of the tummy as being so sexual. But then, I guess there was a lot of controversy over Jeannie showing her belly button back in the day. And, goodness knows I have said many times on fluther that I cannot get over no one at my gym shows their stomach, except behind closed doors in the locker rooms. Do you think your part of the world emphasis that part of the body as sexual more? Belly dancers and all?

A. Not many belly dancers here, per se, and B. maybe it’s just me.

@zen Probably not just you. I think I am just ignorant and naive on that one probably.

You know that Tel Aviv is more like New York than it is, say, like Cairo, right? I think belly dance was an exercise fad here for a while – but then so is pole dancing. ;-)

@zen Yeah, I know. I was just thinking my husband’s paternal side of the family had belly dancers at their weddings. I figured maybe there was a little more of it there than the states. More awareness. Guess not. Sometimes when I belly in my zumba class I feel like it borders on hula. I guess the whole world likes a midrift now that I think about it, I just thought the focus was tits and hips, but now I realize it is naked stomachs that also goes into that same equation.

Um….I like the look of smooth bare skin.
And, gosh darn it, I occasionally even get excited by it. Am I a pig?

Parts of the breast that show when a woman is breastfeeding are not done as a sexual display. In addition, different cultures have different standards and thus, different turn-ons; there are cultures in which the back of the neck is stimulating when displayed.

It’s sexual for horny guys. All guys are horny. 24/7

@Luiveton Are you a girl/guy who likes Justin Bieber or are you actually him? Either way, you scare me. Just saying.

My daughter is on a crusade to convince people that breasts have purposes more than sex. She doesn’t think she should have to cover her babies face in order to nurse in public. She says, “Mouths can be sexual too but you don’t see everyone covering their mouths, why should I have to cover my breast when I am feeding my child?”
My mother in law tried to tell her to go into a bathroom when in a restaurant to feed her baby. My daughters response was, “How would you like to eat your dinner in the bathroom?”
The point is, our society is way to sex obsessed. Sex is good and natural, but our bodies were made for more than that.

@Judi As you may know, I am rather fond of breasts. However, breasfeeding is both important and necessary and should be done wherever necessary. In fact, I do not see breastfeeding as sexual at all – and even a bare breast, if there is a baby attached to it – does not even draw my attention at all. It becomes non-sexual – just as the “mouth” does, of an under-age girl. It becomes a non-issue to me. It is functional, not sexual. Does that make sense?

@_zen__; that was exactly my point, but more than half of America would disagree with you.

@Judi More than half of Americans are morons.

I get the whole “I should feed my baby wherever and whenever I want” thing. But there comes a time when it’s almost easier to go to the bathroom to nurse because the kid is more interested in what’s going on around him than in simply eating, and he wants to play etc. Doing that in public simply attracts more attention, which is not the goal when feeding baby. At that point it’s time for Mom to choose. Either do it at home, find a quiet out of the way place to nurse, or time to start weaning.

Been there, done that.

When society/culture deems it sexual.

@snowberry And, that is why women should have fabulous public restrooms with lounge areas.

@JLeslie It’s nice when it happens, but such rooms are expensive to create and maintain. In your/my dreams it will happen.

@snowberry There are still some around, but it is rare. Better department stores usually have at least one bathroom with a lounge or at minimum a couple comfortable chairs.

@snowberry proves my point.

@snowberry Meanwhile, I think women should be able to breastfeed anywhere; although, I can see expecting reasonable modesty. That anyone looks at it as sexual is very dissappointing. Redpowerlady had been upset with facebook that they seemingy were not or do not allow photos of women breast feeding?

I like the fact that people cover their bodies with clothing. That way when I do see a man naked, I truly appreciate it. If I stared at naked men all day long, what would the attraction be when I got into bed with one? For me, some mystery is sexually attractive. I want to have to work hard to see those private areas :)

@ItalianPrincess1217 “I want to have to work hard to see those private areas”
I know it’s a generalization, but I hardly think that women have to work hard to see a man’s privates.

Baring of skin is not ALWAYS sexual. Nudists bare their skin but don’t feel aroused at other naked bodies at all. Some of the earliest humans walk around naked all the time due to a warm climate, but they don’t necessarily feel sexually aroused EVERY TIME they see skin. There are certain parts of the world where in some ethnic groups who bare most of their skin.

Personally, I think baring of skin becomes sexual when the one who bares it is expressing his or her sexuality verbally or through body language…

@Blackberry I agree for the most part. But I like to work for it. Guys that play hard to get are attractive to me.

@JLeslie There is a line (sometimes it’s a very fine line) between feeding a baby and being overtly sexual about such an activity. I can imagine someone using the excuse of feeding a baby to fully bare both breasts just to prove a point. That’s making a sexual point rather than a “feeding my baby” point. There are all kinds of weirdos out there, and I suspect that’s what some of these rules are designed to address.

I also know boys who were raised in all male households. For these kids to see a woman nursing a baby with a bared breast is (to them) sexual, and not an experience their folks would appreciate. THEY would not notice the baby, but the bared breast. It might for be these sorts of people that Facebook has made their rules.

It’s also possible to nurse a baby without ever showing a bare breast. I know, because I have done it. Other than the kid swallowing wrong (choking) or needing to burp, nobody needs to know what’s going on.
.
So perhaps a good question to ask is “Why, if it’s possible to nurse without showing the bare breast, do some people insist it’s necessary?”

I doubt there’s ever going to be a “normal” to suit everyone, and it’s unlikely there will ever be.

@snowberry Your question, “Why, if it’s possible to nurse without showing the bare breast, do some people insist it’s necessary?”

Because some people want others to understand that they have every right to do so. I’d be willing to bet that if men were the ones breastfeeding their babies…there’d be no issue with showing a bare breast.

Yeah, in some cultures they don’t wear anything on ‘em at all. So….

@snowberry Like I said, a reasonable amount of modesty, but if part of the breast flashes with a change in position or the baby pulling away for a moment, no big deal I would think. Women wanting to make a point it is ok by baring everything or both breasts is unnacceptable in my opinion in a public place generally with maybe a few exceptions.

If young teens catch a glimpse of a woman breast feeding and think it is cool, funny, or sexual I really don’t care what they think. They are young, but they can see a woman’s body in the right context in my opinion.

I used to go topless on southbeach. It was no big deal, because many of us were in our monokini’s. I am sure some men got a kick out of it, I really don’t care. The same men are gawking at women in their bikinis also. I once had a woman on the beach next to me tell me I had beautiful breasts, it did not come across as sexual at all. They used to be one of my better features. Lol.

@JLeslie I agree with your sentiments especially with breast feeding. Teens, adolescents even immature men objectify a woman’s breast and have a hard time differentiating a boob nourishing a child from a sexual totem. Who is to blame??

@Cruiser ; People like @snowberry who insist that women should somehow hide their childrens faces in order to feed them.

I don’t get why breast feeding in public is such a big issue in the west. We don’t have any qualms about it in our country. We understand that it’s something natural and is nothing to be ashamed of or regarded with malice.

@nikkiduq I don’t know if it is all countries in the west. I think most of us on this Q are American, and America can be incredibly puritanical and conservative on certain matters. It would be interesting to know how parts of Europe and Asia think about the issue. Where do you live?

@Judi you said that I “insist that women should somehow hide their kids faces in order to feed them”???

I did not say that! I was playing devil’s advocate, presenting the other side of the issue, which I often do, both here, and in real life. There is always, ALWAYS another side to the issue, and one person’s opinion is as valuable as another’s, no matter whether you agree with them or not. Please don’t put words in my mouth. I have plenty of my own, thank you.

Please, don’t turn this into a flame fest because you misinterpret someone’s comments.

@JLeslie I am from the Philippines. There are a lot of conservative catholics in our country but they don’t really make a big deal out of it. I see mothers breastfeeding their kids in public transportations. Filipino men are modest – they simply turn their heads away once they see a mother breastfeeding her young in public.

@nikkiduq Well, America has a fairly large amount of Evangelical Christians who are generally way more uptight than Catholics.

Regarding breast feeding in public as something sexual is in the mind of the beholder, and that person is responsible for his “dirty” thoughts. He could always chose to dismiss the sexual thought if he wants to.

@nikkiduq I agree.

@snowberry ; I am sorry if you took what I said as “flame bait.” I can assure you it wasn’t intended that way. @Cruiser asked “men objectify a woman’s breast and have a hard time differentiating a boob nourishing a child from a sexual totem. Who is to blame??” and I attempted to answer in a short answer.
the longer answer would be that people who wonder “Why, if it’s possible to nurse without showing the bare breast, do some people insist it’s necessary?”
and believe it’s almost easier to go to the bathroom to nurse because the kid is more interested in what’s going on around him than in simply eating, and he wants to play etc. Doing that in public simply attracts more attention, which is not the goal when feeding baby. At that point it’s time for Mom to choose. Either do it at home, find a quiet out of the way place to nurse, or time to start weaning, appear to be saying that it’s not OK for a child to play and interact with their mother while eating in public, That if her breasts shows it’s offensive, do not help remove the stigma. They only help top perpetuate it. I should not have called you out by name and I apologise.

I have never encouraged my kids to play with their food. Nursing is a precious time, yes. I enjoyed the interaction with my babies, and we would even have fun little games we’d play while nursing, but to invite others into my private time with my little one pushes the limit.

I also would not allow my older babies to undress me to get at my breasts, although they tried. Nobody but my sweetheart undresses me, even my baby. It’s about having appropriate boundaries. Obviously the limits on boundaries vary from person to person, and culture to culture.

@snowberry Sometimes it is a time and space issue. Mommy has to be somewhere, she uses public transportations, the bathrooms are for one person, and if she breast feeds in the bathroom a line of women will be waiting outside the door to pee.

@JLeslie Yup. I agree, Really. I’ve breast fed in public too. Been scolded too, and prohibited from nursing in church. Wasn’t fun, either. I am more sympathetic than you know.

@snowberry; I hope you don’t think I was judging your parenting or your level of modesty. You have every right to nurse in a way that seems right and is comfortable for you and your baby.
My point, in responding to this question is, that all mothers should be able to feed their babies in a way that seems right for them and their child without fear of being oogled by perverts or asked to stop by someone who can’t see breasts as more than a sexual toy for men.
I actually covered my babies in public but my daughter doesn’t. I respect that her level of modesty isn’t as high as mine. I actually admire her courage to take a stand on something she believes in.

@Judi Agreed. And, if you are brave enough to bare your breast in public knowing that the world is simply full of perverts, gropers, and all sorts of idiots, you know what could happen. It’s too bad, but that’s the way it is.

@snowberry I read that as “to ‘bake’ your breast in public..” lol.

Any ways, I really don’t care if a woman shows her breast whilst breastfeeding or not. Most women I’ve seen, where I live, put a baby blanket/towel over the infant and their breast. I agree with the opinions that it’s every woman’s right to nurse their baby in whatever way is most comfortable for them.

@Judi She doesn’t think she should have to cover her babies face in order to nurse in public. She says, “Mouths can be sexual too but you don’t see everyone covering their mouths, why should I have to cover my breast when I am feeding my child?” Quite elementary my dear Watson, it is the ”evil nipple”. As much as the breast is vilified, the nipple that is the worse. Though fully covered, but seen as ’bullets” under a spaghetti top on a hot day, or a sweater on a brisk on. That is why women would pass the ”pencil test” with flying colors are shamed into the bra. Society has to start training young women to hide the nipple the moment they start budding out, that is why they call them training bras. One does not need to train the breast to do what they do or train women to wear them, nature will take care of that. A lot of swimwear the breast is barely covered, you can see most of the side, top, and bottom, all that is there is a triangular swatch of fabric covering the nipple and areole. If the little nipper should break the lip lock and expose the “evil nipple” the sky might fall, and the earth might shake.

Here in the US exposed skin is usually sexual because that is how society and the media set it up. The neck is the cusp of the shoulders, the shoulder the cusp of cleavage, cleavage equals breast. Brest in turn mean nipple. The belly or midriff is the isthmus between breast and vulva. Coming from the other direction the shin leads to knee, the knee to the thigh, and the thigh the gateway to the butt, and vulva as well as the hips that border them.

Much emphasis is placed on sex, in the media and most sex is done naked or near to it, skin leads of thoughts of nakedness with goes to sex.

No, it’s not always sexual. There are people who like making things sexual that aren’t. Whose problem is that? In my opinion, the problem is in the minds of people who twist innocent situations into things they are not.

I think connecting baring of skin in public has more to do with cultural background than anything. My Muslim friends (the ones where the ladies are all covered up) seem to think that showing *any*skin or even body shape where a man not related to them can see them is sexual….Or something. Maybe someone here has a better understanding of their beliefs than I do.

Any insight?