Why wouldn't you date someone with kids?

I don’t personally want kids, and I don’t want other people’s kids either.

Now cats and dogs, I’ll gladly take!

Yes to all of the reasons you stated in your description. I would also gladly date someone with multiple pets.

I’m not sure yet that I want kids, so I wouldn’t date someone who has ‘em already. I like kids when they belong to other people and I can give them back.

@noelleptc I’m weeding out those that aren’t interested. Lol.

Because the wife would cut my balls off!
Not quite what you meant, but the truth nevertheless.

I’ll date if the kid is as cute and funny as that Jonathan Lipnicki(?) in Jerry Mcguire movie.

Too late. I dated someone with kids, and then I married him. And I love the kids.

My apprehension before it happened was because I didn’t want to deal with the ex. I also feared what might happen if the kids didn’t like me. Helping to raise someone elses’ kids is a big task.

Is it because you will have to deal with their ex and possible drama? Yes.
You don’t like kids? No.
You assume it will turn serious quicker than you hoped? No.

But also:

If I end up staying with her, I end up adopting her kids, more or less.

I have to get into relationships with all of the kids, many of which may not like me or resent me being their mom’s lover, not their dad, taking attention from their mom, etc.

I might prefer to have a woman all to myself, or at least to be her #1 love.

I might prefer to have any kids in my family be my kids with their mother, not with some other guy who was dumped for a reason (and may be crazy, abusive, etc.).

Extra expenses that I would end up contributing to, which weren’t originally my responsibility.

Extra inlaws who may also be crazy pains, etc.

I have kids of my own, so my big concern is integrating the two families. it would be real hard of they are near my kids age.

I am willing to date a woman with young kids (under age 6). The families would mesh together much more easily.

When I dated my wife, she had a daughter from a previous mistake.
When we married, I told my wife that I didn’t want to be a step father to her daughter. I wanted to be like her dad. She agreed, and that’s how it was.

It would depend on how they speak about their ex, and if they fight a lot. If they have a good relationship and everything’s fair, then no problem. If they fight a lot and say mean things about eachother, then no. I would not want to be involved with someone like that. They were attached enough to have unprotected sex and produce a child; the relationship needs to respect the child’s origins for the child’s sake. Kids need to feel that at one point, their parents loved eachother enough to have them.

I have no issue dating someone who has kids, I love kids they don’t ask to be born or to be brought into situations we bring them into. We should just accept them for whom they are and care for them regardless if they are part of us or not. I figure if I can love their father I can love them as well.

I have and love kids. I have no issue with it.
You have your own rules and reasons, but it’s sorta Hypocritical in my opinion.

I never would date anyone who had custody of their children. I only like my kids and my friends’ kids—not kids in general. I had not interest in hanging out with a date’s children and knew and made it clear that I would never help anyone raise their children.

I love kids. Love hanging out with them, they make holidays more fun.
I’d adopt a houseful of kids and skip the relationship part.

Because I don’t want kids, and I especially don’t want someone else’s kids and all the drama that situation would probably bring.

@blueiiznh I know I’m being hypocritical, but again I don’t do well with other’s kids. I don’t know why but I never feel comfortable around them. Even with my own niece I feel strange. Also, I don’t want to have any more lids and I feel if I date someone with kids and we marry they are more likely to expect me to have a child with them and I just don’t want to come off as a bitch.

I used to say I’d never date or be together with a man who already had kids because the mother of the kids will be the mother of the kids… forever and that means they’re in your life forever too. Aside from that, the kids will never be your kids and being junior adults, always testing the boundaries around them and their own powers to get what they want, they will use you against your partner and you & your partner against their mother if it means they’ll get whatever it is they want.

The reality is that there have been very few men past the age of 25yrs old who don’t already have kids with an ex wife or out of wedlock. It gets to be slim pickings out there. I’m in my early 40’s and have waited years to find a good partner who is responsible and single without kids but it’s never happened.

The upside of pre existing kids is if they like you then it’s a lot of fun to learn new things from their perspectives, fun to show them neat things from yours, fulfilling to be able to help them navigate growing up, a full table feels better than an empty one. This assumes the kids are open to you though and don’t treat you like an elephant in the room.

Because I’m married. ;^)

but assuming I were dating:

Baggage and drama. And I love kids. Got a great daughter of my own. But now, in my life, I want simple – and kids are anything but simple.

Truth is, I’d probably never date at all in the unlikely event my wife were hit by a meteor or something.

@Ajulutsikael I do understand your point and it is far better to be in check with your desires/abilities on children versus entering into something. I applaud you knowing what you want for a relationship and what works for you. I wish more were foreward thinking in this regard.