Do you think children are being sexulized too early?

The whole point of moitoring children’s sexual behaviour is based on the notion that they are not emotionally, finanially, socially, intellectually (etc) ready to raise children until they are older than the age that they can actually reproduce.
And as you noticed, the problem is not children. Nor is it the marketplace. The problem is parents. None of the things that you mentioned would sell a single unit, or have a place on any shelf, if there were not peculiar parents to buy them.

Yes and no. I don’t mind if a 5 year old wants to play dress up, but it should be just that dress up, play, not every day wear, and I don’t think the elementary age child understands the sex part anyway, they just want to mimic their mom or a pop star. The average age for girls to start their periods in the US is 12 years old. Which means many start as early as 11, some 10. So they are already beginning to develop. Most times the girls who first develop hate it, they want to hide their breasts. A 14 year old wearing a swim suit with some padding doesn’t bother me at all, although it would be nice if our obsession in the US with breasts would tone down a little. Some suits are just molded cups which helps hide hard nipples, and some girls really want to hide that for modesty reasons, I see nothing wrong with that.

Yes. But I think there is a difference between letting children know about sex or explore their pre-sexual feelings and pressuring them to be sexual beings in ways they cannot understand. I also think that hiding sex as if it is something dirty is harmful to their psychological development.

I don’t hang out with the parenting community, so I don’t know what actual children are wearing, but I don’t think teens are too sexualized (is that a word?), either.

I think it’s a sad commentary on our grossly self obsessed society and the rampant narcissism that says if a girl/woman is ‘less than’ perfect in the eyes of a distorted cultural mean, one’s base, intrinsic ‘value’ is at stake.
Obviously the median age of a child buying into these distorted messages/images is getting younger and younger.

I was a pretty girl/woman, but, I always wanted to be liked for my brains over my breasts.

I think the risk is high also, when only focusing on your looks, to not develop your inner qualities and then, as I have seen amongst some of my (ex) friends, a complete breakdown in midlife when ones sexual ‘currency’ is losing it’s value, and these woman are left terrified they have nothing to offer beyond their bodies, which are now ‘betraying’ them.

Sad indeed.

I have no easy answers, other than a parent doing their best to communicate that ones value is far deeper than their external appearance.

This is Western civilization. Sex sells. How do we describe a new car with nice lines? Sexy. How about a computer, or HDTV, or having console with great specs? Sexy. Now, if we can sexualize inanimate objects, why not kids?

Seriously though, our culture is obsessed with sex, and I think it safe to assume that most parents want their kids to fit in and be normal. I mean, how many parents here want their kids to be outcasts or weirdos? We start impressing other values on them early on.

@josie @Coloma Great answers!

The most ridiculous thing about it is of course the fact that, in roughly the same time-scale as this becoming the case, paedophiles have become the ultimate pariahs of this very same society.

Honestly though, I don’t think it’s a problem for boys at all, I think the real pressure from mass-media and pop-culture is on the girls.

Yeah but as a parent one can forbid some clothes from the wardrobe.
[ forbid as not buying and let them wear from friends .. but this for certain ages because after some years some of the clothes become a necessity ]

@The_Idler ~Well, mom never won a pageant and little Suzie is cute, so why not live vicariously, tart the kid up, and march her out looking better than mom ever did? It’ll give mom the pride of winning a pageant, and who cares what it does to the kid since kids are not people until they turn 18. And can you blame guys for preferring kids over psycho-moms?

@The_Idler I think its a fair point you make, and as for the paedophiles, thats a whole other ball game.

But I think you all make a fair point, however it does not take away from the fact that stores still sell this stuff and girls still want it.

Has anyone been to a wedding or disco recently and seen how these youngster’s dance, and this is what they have learn’t from watch music videos!!

When you have Christian teenaged girls who think that if you have anal sex but not vaginal sex, you’re still a virgin, you have a population of overly sexualized and undereducated young people.

Children’s beauty pageants, provocative clothes for children are extensions of the parent’s fantasies, usually mothers, who didn’t get to be the cheerleader/homecoming queen/ballerina when they were a child. On the other side, we have sports, particularly boy’s sports, that are so parent dominated that 3rd graders are playing tackle football and getting concussions. Sports for kids these days is predominantly adult-led. How often do you see a bunch of kids in the US playing a game of soccer/baseball/football after school or in an empty lot, on their own? How many people put a basketball goal up in their driveway, only to have it go unused?

I think many parents need to stop living vicariously through their children.

@BeccaBoo Disco? This ain’t 1977 :D

@BarnacleBill Right on!

@jerv Well it is in my head :-P

Kids should not even know what sexy is… for a long as possible. It’s gross.

@everephebe That depends on how you define “kid”. Personally, I think that the marketplace and the media shouldn’t be pushing their idea of “sexy” on people of any age, but our culture is so uptight about sex and sexuality that the easiest way to make a buck is to sell forbidden fruit and fantasies.
Of course, this leads to a backlash and the only way we can solve the problem is to either ignore it (in which case it’ll only get worse) or overreact and be more prudish than Victorians (who were actually rather freaky in private).

yes

I think so. You see so many 12, 13 and 14 year old girls wearing ‘sexy’ clothes and hear of ‘friends with privileges’ at that age. But I speak as a very late bloomer. Kids are developing earlier and earlier, probably due to the earlier introduction of animal protein in their diet. Some girls are getting their periods as early as 9. I don’t know how you cope with that. It’s a brave new world.

Do ya think? http://www.sodahead.com/living/does-big-business-exploit-and-sexualize-children-for-profit/question-1683175/?link=ibaf&imgurl=http://www.thephotoenhancer.com/MAKYNLI%2520013-1.jpg&q=toddlers%2Band%2Btiaras scroll down

@woodcutter Omg…and if you can tare yourself away from all the pics and ad’s what some poeple have to say is very interesting!!

Anyone else looked at this link?

WTF…just looked at ‘Toddlers in Tiara’s’ never heard of anything like that before, I knew you had paget’s in America, but this is amazing that some women would do that to their kids? Is this shit for real??

Not for wanting to judge but are there any mum’s on here that have actually put their kids through beauty Pagets? Why?

Bizarre. I tried to watch an episode of toddlers and couldn’t do it. I can’t stand most programming on TLC network. They continue to exist because apparently people like it, that’s the only way this works.

I would rather listen to someone scraping their nails down a blackboard than have to watch what these women are putting their babies through ( and i say babie because they ever do it to them) Aaaaaaarrrrrrgggggghhhhhhh!!!

That toddler thing is horrible :-/
She should be playing with her doll, not made to look like one.

Yes. The items you mention, I can’t believe they were sold to investors, marketers and production spent on them, they sound inane but I don’t shop the children’s aisles and have no idea what is offered. I only know what I see as far as what little kids wear and I don’t like it. Just as @JLeslie wrote, playing dress up is one thing, wearing miniature versions of grown up “hoochie” clothes as daily wear is another.

Never having heard of a pole-dancing kit for children, I had to look it up. As kids, we used to swing on the vertical metal poles in friends’ basements because it was fun. None of us, at the time, even knew what ‘sex’ or ‘sexual’ was.

I was sort of hoping that it would be marketed as some sort of innocent toy designed for a combination of fun and exercise. Silly me. Here is a link to a UK article that shows a picture of the product. Seriously…a kit that shows an adult female in a bikini and comes with a garter belt and a DVD showing ‘suggestive’ dance moves?

What is even worse is that the store carrying the product marketed it as, Unleash the sex kitten inside…simply extend the Peekaboo pole inside the tube, slip on the sexy tunes and away you go! “Soon you’ll be flaunting it to the world and earning a fortune in Peekaboo Dance Dollars.

A standing ovation to the people who got the product pulled from the store shelves.

Given how hard out is to get a job nowadays, that may be the only way a girl can earn a dollar when she grows up!

Or is that too cynical?

@Sunny2 I think early menses has more to do with girls being fat than protein or hormones in food.

@JLeslie Actually, both are factors. Regardless, diet plays a role either way, as does stress.

I also think stress is overplayed. But, I am willing to concede it is a variety of factors probably.

As the mother of boys I can say that with my kids and their friends I don’t see this as an issue. My boys aren’t huge into organized sports so I don’t
really see what @Barnaclebill
mentioned, but I do think that
is a valid point.

I think for mothers of girls it is a whole different ball game. I
am horrified by the sexualized images of women that pervade our society and at the percentage of parents who think this is a good image to
embrace. When the standard outfit for a 13 year-old middle school girl is poom-poom shorts and a spaghetti strapped tank top, I think there is a problem.

@JLeslie While stress does get a little too much hype, I think that those who ignore it’s effect on the body are also probably not quite ready to accept germ theory and may well have a jar of leeches to cure what ails them.
Thing is, the human body is pretty complex, and sometimes acts in odd ways. Sometimes changing one thing can affect many other things that you wouldn’t think were related, kind of like playing Pickup-sticks.

@SuperMouse The catch is what do we do about it? Our culture isn’t known for moderate, rational responses :/

@SuperMouse I had to look up poom poom shorts. They are just short shorts, right? I have no problem with shorts and a tank top. As long as their tushie is not hanging out, I can’t see what the big deal is?

@JLeslie There is short, and then there is short. We are talking “exposed curvature” here. I’ve seen some that make Daisy Dukes look like Capri pants.

@jerv Like I said I would not want exposed curvature, but when I googled poom poom it did not show that. That is why I asked what type of short it actually is. I used to ask my neice if she thought she was Brittany Spears with her too short shorts. She used to smile and nod yes. I told her Brittany is on stage, in school and in the mall she would not be wearing the same thing.

Still tank top? What’s wrong with a tank top?

I wouldn’t say that children are being sexualized too early, necessarily, but the exposure to the relaxed sexual displays on advertisements and in the media along with the controversy surrounding such things otherwise is detrimental to children in thinking it may be alright too early.

@SuperMouse Are you talking about in school? Because in school I like a more conservative standard, I believe in dress codes and uniforms. But, hanging out with friends after school, shorts and tank tops would not bother me at all at any age.

@JLeslie I am talking about shorts that reveal wwwaaayy too much and itty bitty, tight tank tops which leave very little to the imagination. I believe it
is important for pre-teen and
teen girls to be taught some
kind of modesty. No matter
what I don’t think it is appropriate attire for school
and it is what the majority of
girls at my boy’s middle school
wear.

@jerv you are right there just
isn’t much we can do. I
place my hope in parents like
my sister and her husband and
some other girl moms I know
who flat out refuse to let their
daughters out of the house dressed like floozies.

@SuperMouse What is waaayyyy too much, their ass is hanging out? See above your post that I don’t like short shorts for school.

Are these shorts waayyyy too short?

No those are really tame and they are on a real woman this time.

Where I live they are incredibly conservative in their clothing, so I doubt I am seeing what some girls are wearing, that is why I ask. When I lived in FL everyone is half naked all of the time, it is like a nothing, but I still think no one should have their ass hanging out of their shorts.

@JLeslie, for a 12 year-old girl to wear to school I would say yes those shorts are wwwaaayyy too short. @woodcutter‘s point is
important, the person in that
photo is a woman not a child. That being said, I think ass cheek hanging out at any age is unattractive.

@JLeslie

I don’t know your age, but, remember the 70’s when guys always had their scrotums hanging out of their OP’s? lolol

@Coloma Blech. LOL! I’m old enough.

@SuperMouse Those shorts on a young girl at school is pushing it, I agree. But, after school I think they are fine any age.

I didn’t see her asscheeks there is why they seem comparability tame. There are proper places to have those clothes say like the beach.

@JLeslie

I know, it was so gross!

If we forget about school, pretty much age does not affect how I feel about shorts for a girl/woman. You would have to start talking low cut tops, exposed middrifts, and high heels for me to start wincing I think.

Adults should be able to wear whatever they want, it’s their choice. As long as it isn’t violating any decency laws anything goes. It’s America.

@woodcutter But it can still be in bad taste and too revealing. It isn’t just about what they have the legal right to do. I have a feeling a lot of people on this thread would not be happy if when their daughter went to their friend’s house the mom mom wore extremely short shorts and a tank top with their bra strap showing with a push up bra and cleavage easily visible.

We are talking adults having the fast clothes which is something they are supposed to know the pitfalls of, but minors shouldn’t be wearing risque gear. It makes them an attractive nuisance and a always good judgement should prevail when deciding when to wear that kind of outfit. it says more about the wearer than the garment

@JLeslie I was thinking more along these lines or shorter; basically a biking bottom, only marketed as shorts.

There is a mum at the school where my children attend. I am not kidding the dad’s love her because her dress sense leaves little to the imagnation. Now she is going into a swarm of us mummies that do not have time to preen, dress, work out and look fabulous all the time. She stands along and looks so miserable all the time.

I went and spoke to her once because i felt sorry for her. She stank of booze and was not quite with it!! Need i say more.
I have since found out she has done some modelling and glamour work, she is not the brightest button in the box and to tell you the truth, most of the other women shy away from her, not only do they find the way she dresses inappropriate but her whole attitude sucks!

I have yet to meet a sexy lady who dresses in a provocative way, that does not have her head stuck so far up her own bottom that she see’s the sunshine!!
I wonder what she was like as a child? Apprently she has modeled since she was a child!

She also has a bratty daughter! Ironic huh!

@jerv Yeah, that is ridiculous, unless it is a bikini bottom and you are on a beach.

@woodcutter Yes, true, the adult knows the pitfalls, but we all have to keep in mind that young people very quickly want to be “grown up” and so what they perceive as adult clothing and behavior by those around them is what they start to mimic. Dolly Parton has said the town tart when she was growing up had big hair, lots of make-up and dressed trashy, and she just thought as a young girl she was beautiful and wanted to look like her.

And, some adult women don’t understand or have the taste level for the difference between trashy and sexy.

See, everyone at the school should, I use that word should lightly, be dressed a certain way at every age, it is a school. A mom would not likely walk in for a teacher meeting in tight short jean shorts, even those that cover her bottom. Everyone, all ages, can where a bikini at the beach, should not walk sleeveless into an orthodox synagogue, and on and on. Generally, I do not like to put an age on things. Young girls are not in tight dresses and high heals, because they are not going to the same places we are usually. Plus, a 9 year old has a different body type than a 30 year old, so the clothing will be styled differently. Of course there is some room for age appropriate, but it is not really a big dividing line in my opinion.

@JLeslie, the problem as I see it is that many young girls are wearing those tight dresses and other less appropriate things when the purpose of
the style is to look sexy. No
little girl has any business
wearing a style designed to
make her look sexy. In all arenas parents of young girls have to be careful to monitor to be sure their daughter is not dressing like the town tart. As a little girl I admired the look of the lady with the huge hair and
pink hot pants but my mom certainly never let me dress like that.

@SuperMouse I agree. But, if the mom doesn’t know any better for herself, she probably isn’t going to get it for her daughter either.

When I managed the childrens department at Bloomingdale’s we always talked about how young children are more on trend than adults. They buy the bell bottoms as soon as they come back into vogue, and the ruffle shirts, trendy sweat suits, etc. Trashy was not a style for young kids, but they certainly wore shorts and tank tops. Some of it has to do with fabric. Tight fitting spandex vs tight jean shorts is too different things. Also, 10 years old is very different from 14. 14 is that crazy age where kids are really getting into the teen scene. I am sure it must torture parents.

Juicy Couture really pissed me off when they were writing Juicy on the ass of our young girls, and mom were permitting it, but then even grown women should not wear that. They seemed to have stopped it. I actually like a lot of their clothes. Still the name pisses me off.

It’s just creepy, those ‘toddlers in tiaras’...how ‘they’ can take the face of an angelic little girl and turn her into a Tammy Faye Baker look alike. Who could possibly think there is anything attractive in such exploitation? Gag!

Tom Hanks spoof on Toddlers in Tiaras.

Whoa, I just looked up ‘Toddlers in Tiaras’...

That is some seriously scary shit.

I mean, I just don’t understand how the most ridiculously innocuous stuff gets edited out of European & Japanese programmes/films/books for the American market
(I remember reading that an Irish book about a 13 year old criminal genius was edited, because at one point he predicts that, once he hits puberty, he may possibly become attracted to the main female character. That’s all. Nevermind the fact that it actually happens in the next book o.O Oh yeah, and it’s OK for the protagonist to be a criminal mastermind, but apparently being aware of The Facts of Life is just totally unacceptable. I know there are many famous cases of almost absurdly mild suggestive language being banned for musical acts, though that was some time ago (The Stones were not allowed to use the phrase ‘spend the night’ hah. But still, just look at any Japanese anime that’s been dubbed & edited for broadcast in the US. In many cases the plot becomes almost non-sensical after the scenes they cut out or dialogue they change. Bowdlerise, that’s what the Americans do.)
while at the same, you have stuff like this!?

Children are naturally curious about their bodies and sexual functions — they wonder where babies come from, they notice anatomical differences between males and females, and many engage in genital play or masturbation. Child sex play includes exhibiting or inspecting the genitals. Many children take part in some sex play, typically with siblings or friends.[1] Sex play with others usually decreases as children go through their elementary school years, yet they still may possess romantic interest in their peers. Curiosity levels remain high during these years, escalating in puberty (roughly the teenage years) when the main surge in sexual interest occurs.[1]

Now tell me all this stuff does not have an effect, when what is quoted above is how children behave naturally, when bought up in a stable enviroment. Its quite scary really!

I understand what @SuperMouse is talking about. There are shorts that just barely cover a girl’s butt and skimpy tank tops that look like the kind little girls of 70’s and earlier used to wear as undershirts. To me, what’s a normal dailywear outfit is not something that would be worn as pajamas or around the house at home.

There is a theory I’ve developed over time as to why seeing girls dressed like this makes some moms and dads uncomfortable. Have you ever seen a pre teen or very young teen girl whose body is just beginning to take on womanly shape? Something about it makes you look closely which girls want the boys and other girls to do but not so much grown men and parents who don’t want the grown men looking.