Caught between a friend and my hair... what would you do?

Do it yourself (or have another stylist do it). If she feels guilty, well, then maybe she has something to feel guilty for – she did cancel on you repeatedly.

Do it yourself or go to a salon. I’m sorry, it may suck for her, but what are you going to do . . . never get it done b/c she doesn’t seem to have a good day?!

Just do it yourself or go to another stylist if you want to make sure it’s done correctly. She’d be pretty unreasonable if she can’t understand why. In fact, I’m surprised she hasn’t said, “sorry” and recommended you find someone else this time around.

How about letting her know that you cannot wait any longer and plan to do it yourself or go to a salon? There is a reason behind why she is cancelling these appointments. Take it as a tacit way of her saying that she is uncomfortable, for whatever reason, for doing your hair.

Are you kidding?She’s cancelled on you 3 times! Don’t wait for her and do it yourself or find another stylist.At this point,the last thing I’d be worried about is hurting her feelings.:)

What about going to another stylist and having it done?

@Pied_Pfeffer She does have reasons. She is sick, tired or had a bad day with the kids. She is telling the truth – she has issues with anxiety and depression and gets overwhelmed easily plus her husband travels fairly often – it isn’t an issue of her being uncomfortable.

@lucillelucillelucille She is one of my best friends, which is why I don’t want to hurt her feelings.

@marinelife That would upset her even more.

I’m just going to do it. Decision made. Doing it tonight.

@Supacase I feel your pain…I recently had to get a haircut after my “stylist on the fly” canceled…I had zero choice.

Color it as best you can at home. I don’t understand this type of behavior either…I know mine likes the cash & needs it.

If you don’t want to use store-bought dye, go to Sally’s Beauty Supply- they have salon-like stuff.
What everyone else said—go ahead and have your hair done. You’re definitely a sweet person to worry about her feelings, but you got 3 inch roots…
She will probably get her feelings hurt, but that’s a natural consequence. I’ve been in many situations where I’ve wanted, wanted, wanted to do something for others, but circumstances didn’t allow it and they had to go elsewhere. They weren’t as sensitive to my circumstances as you are, but I also knew that was a consequence of not being capable of helping. She’ll either get over it and be a bit more conscietious about following through next time, or she will get upset and stay upset. That’s out of your control, your roots aren’t!

@linguaphile ”You’re definitely a sweet person to worry about her feelings, but you got 3 inch roots…”

Oh man, that made me giggle.

If she’s cancelling like that, she’s treating as not real work, which makes you not a real client. She does your hair when it’s convenient for her, and if it’s not convenient for you, you should get what you need done by other means. Friendship should be out of the equation. It’s easier to stay friends if you’re not annoyed with her, and the easiest way to not be annoyed is to do what you would do if she didn’t happen to be a professionally trained stylist.

@Vunessuh At first I read “I have 3 grey roots. I was like SO????

@Supacase If she is that good of a friend,she will understand your frustration at her inability to keep to her word.I would tell her and not think twice about it, ;)

I’d maybe talk to her first and say you can’t stand your hair anymore so you have to do it.

I say go to the salon. Then when she asks about it say you realized she had become a little overwhelmed cancelling 3 times so to ease things up a bit you went to a 3rd party because it needed to get done. As much as she is youre friend she took responsiblity to be your stylist as well. Tell her it was only for this time and make an appt for the next touch up. If she cancels then, then perhaps she is not in that desperate a position to make the extra cash you were giving. If its a good friendship she with see things from your P.O.V reassess and respond accordingly.

If this is an actual friendship, it’ll survive the hair.

Just do it yourself or get someone else to do it. If she asks about it, say you know she is really busy and your hair was getting on your nerves. I am sure she will be fine.

Get your hair done, your friend will understand as much as you’ve understood why she cancels.

I have a similar set up with a good friend who gives an excellent haircut. She lives an hour away from me and never comes to me, I always go to her because she has child to schedule around. It drives me CRAZY when she cancels over and over and she doesn’t like to finally meet up with me to see I’ve cut my own hair or had someone else do it but we forgive each other. Stuff happens.

Just wondering if your friend usually does this free of charge or if you pay a reasonable rate for it. It seems to me that that might figure in how you and she handle this unprofessional behavior in the context of your friendship.

Use one of the shampoo in coloring products. They are very easy to use and my experience was that it made my hair more manageable. Or, if there are less than 20 white hairs, pull them out with a tweezers. It’ll give you time to put off making a decision.

Just do it. She might be relieved you did it yourself. It sounds like she is having trouble finding the time right now.

Did ya do it? Did ya do it??