Your spouse does not like your pet and one has to go, which do you keep?
You have your pet _________ and had it from the time it was weaned or very young. You have a mate whom you have been with eight months or more and things are getting very serious in the relationship and you and to take it up a level. Your spouse does not like your pet ________ and makes it clear either you get rid of __________ or he/she is walking. What do you do? Who stays and who goes? Would the fact of the pet being pedigree, the amount of money you spent to get it or if it was free, or came from the pound make any difference on how you choose?
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So many questions relating to sacrifice, what’s all that about eh?
I’d talk her round & get to “keep” both. I’m very persuasive see.
The spouse. I don’t like people that don’t like animals anyway.
Spouse .. because I do not like people who make me choose them over friends I’ve had for a long time. Like what the hell .. I know you for 8 months and you gonna make me choose you over a friend who I had for a lifetime .. No freakin way I’m gonna choose you over the pet.
[ there’s nothing she can do for me to make me choose her over the pet unless she gets the point of working together with the pet .. making them get along is the best ]
If I had the pet before the spouse, and he/she didn’t like the pet, before we were married, we probably wouldn’t be married. If they were allergic to the pet, that would have been worked out during dating. If they wanted me to get rid of the pet because they didn’t like it, then that would be a sign that they were a control freak and we wouldn’t be married. Short of a cat, dog or goldfish, I can’t see myself owning any other sort of pet, and there’s no way I would own an annoying dog. Fish don’t do anything to be bothersome, and cats are pretty much like living with an adult.
I wouldn’t be with someone who does not like my pet. I also would not be with someone who makes me choose between such things. If I were ..um I choose the human to go.
And I hope my dog bites them in the butt on the way out; or urinates in their favourite shoes.
Getting rid of a pet because someone does not like them ..is wrong to me.
My dog has been in my life for almost 15 years. He would prevail over any new relationship now.
I don’t date people who don’t like or are allergic to cats, and if they dislike any of my cats, specifically, as soon as I realized that, they’d be gone. So I don’t see it getting to an 8 month point.
The spouse.
The emotional bond toward the pet is stronger, and besides, the pet is not giving such an ultimatum.
Eight months? That’s an easy decision. The spouse, can pack their bags and keep walking.
I don’t think I would want to be with someone who tried to make me choose. That seems so selfish. I am responsible for my pets. I took them on for the length of their lives and they rely on me. A spouse can take care of their own needs and if needs be can find the door.
@ucme If you could not talk them into making peace with you dog, cat, boa, pot belly pig, monitor lizzard, etc. they just was not going to live with it around, then what?
Anybody who doesn’t like my pet ; I won’t be in a close relationship with. Animals are everything to me. My pet, whom recently passed away was my best friend for 11 years. It hurt so much when he died. If anybody who didn’t like him, i wouldnt think of marriage.
Why are we married if we’ve only been together eight months? That seems like a relationship we’ve rushed into and we’ve not even found out the basics about each other, like the fact that he doesn’t like my beloved pet. This relationship is not going to last. It’s not built on a strong foundation. Best to make the break now.
Now if my husband of 10 years developed an allergy to our dog, where he was miserable, sniffing around the place and generally being unhappy I would have to say that I would find the dog a new loving home. I would value my long term stable relationship more than having a pet. But I don’t have a pet so it’s all conjecture.
@Stinley Psst I never mention marriage…..others did.
Oh, but spouse is means a husband or wife
The spouse goes and I will pack her bags for her. A true loyal companion is everything and if she can’t find it in her heart to love my pet as much as she claims to love me…..SEE YA!
If I had the pet before the spouse, the spouse has to go. If she married me knowing I have this pet and how I feel about my pet, she has to accept it.
@Stinley In these days of cohabitating without marriage many I know believe their unmarried mate is their spouse.
@Hypocrisy_Central Okay so now I have to pretend I live with a mean spirited bitch, who has not one single redeeming feature. Hmmm, it’s a toughie….i’ll pack her bags, like yesterday.
@Hypocrisy_Central yes, you can use it to mean a long term stable relationship. People use it to mean someone they’ve committed to. It means a marriage partner in name or all but name. Not a short term, let’s live together for the summer relationship. That’s not what it means.
I wouldn’t be married to a man that would ask me to do that and you can’t make me pick.So there! XD
The spouse should have made whatever issue is to be made ahead of time, not after marriage.
After the marriage you got what you bought.
This does sound like the classic/cliche “the man marries assuming his wife will never change and she does, the woman marries assuming she will change her man but he doesn’t”
That person would never have become my spouse if he did not like my pet.
Spouse = marriage, SO/Significant Other = cohabitation or marriage status unknown.
So yes, you mentioned married.
@chyna Oh, i wasn’t clear? :-)
^I’ll just use my imagination.
The issue would never have come up. A mutual love of animals would have presented itself very early in the relationship, and if my spouse-to-be disliked my pet THAT much, they would no longer be my “spouse-to-be.” : )
You have to be an animal lover to be with this girl. If it’s not there, then the relationship will never happen.
I’m the same as most—the pet stays, the person is gone, and I’ll be wondering why it took me so long to realize that.
Them not liking other animals, there’s no future in any way. Add to that them actually having the audacity to tell me who to [my pet] and what to [a life with other animals] give up for them? What’ll they be demanding next?
I know a true story similar to this: two people, one loves other animals, one at their best will barely, barely tolerate them, and is allergic to cats. The second gives the first a cat as a gift. They move in with each other. Now the second tells the first they have to get rid of the cat.
Been there, done that. Never again! lol
I had a wonderful Military Macaw that I loved dearly. My ex hated him. After years of fighting I found “Louie” a wonderful new home with a girlfriend. THEN, I ended up divorcing my ex a few years later. Gah!
He was always so jealous of my animals, if all the attention wasn’t on him. Gag! haha
I should have listened to my cat years ago that crapped on his pillow when we were dating, and then, pissed ON him in bed one night.
Poor ‘Jerome’ he KNEW! lololol
The pet would stay. I have never found myself attracted to a person once I found out that they weren’t an animal lover (or at least an animal liker) and so I couldn’t see myself ever wanting to be with someone who gave me such an ultimatum seeing as anyone that knows me knows how much my animals mean to me. and if they cared enough about me they wouldn’t expect me to make such a decision.
Why am I married to someone I’ve been with for 8 months? How did I get married to someone who then revealed they don’t like my pet?
Ok, its a spouse, not a lover. I would pick the spouse. But I would try to find out why the spouse doesn’t like the pet and vice versa. I would want him to take a pet training class. If he loves you than he sould at least try to work things out.
If its a matter that the pet is very dangerous or aggressive, I probably wouldn’ve gotten rid of the pet way before it got to that point or seen a trainer to see what can be done.
If the reason is that the pet is making him sick than again I would pick the spouse. (he has no contol over allergies)
If he pretended to like your pet and now he is showing his true colors and isn’t willing to try to work things out to make you happy, than your in a bad and controling marriage. In which case I would choose the pet.
Pedigree would not matter.
If it was just a boyfriend and he just didn’t like animals than I wouldn’t never dated him never mind marry him knowing he would never accept my pet.
Sometimes people don’t like someones pet but it really isn’t the pet they don’t like. They don’t like how lazy their partner is in caring for the pet and don’t want the responsibilty of its care to be completely theirs when they didn’t want the responsibilty of a pet anyway. I’ve seen plenty of people who have pets just to have them.
Marriage aside take “spouse” as a blanket cover for b/f, g/f, extended booty call, lover, baby daddy, baby mamma, SO, the hubby, the wife, the old man, the old lady, basically anyone you have some ties with to regularly do the horizontal mambo in the sheets with. If is there any coupling I missed?
The SO mentioned fairly early on in our relationship that he didn’t want to have a pet. As a child, he was bitten by a dog while on his paper route, and the fear has lingered all of these years. He has other reasons for not wanting any other type of pet, and I respect that.
Had I still owned a pet when we decided to marry, I would have been willing to find the pet a new, loving home. He is worth it.
@chyna @rebbel Clarify please? :-) The woman is staying and the gecko, cat, dog, anaconda, gerbil, mouse, Macaw, etc is toast….
From this question, it sounds like the pet was there first. If the spouse wants me to get rid of my pet after only eight months, who knows what other things they will try to make me change down the road! The pet stays. But even if the pet didn’t stay, that spouse would be out of there.
The guy goes. Any guy that serious about me who make that kind of ultimatum isn’t my kind of guy.
I happen to dislike both of my fiancee’s dogs for different reasons but I’d never asked him to get rid of them before we moved in together. Besides, I know he would have chosen the dogs.~
The pet went. My hubby is allergic.
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