How can I work on my social anxiety?

First of all, it might be beneficial to find the root of your social anxiety. You say you used to be fine and comfortable in social situations. So, what changed that? Sometimes if you can identify the root of your fear, it’s easier to overcome it. Or, you may have no idea and feel like there’s no reason to your phobia… which is actually quite common.

Anyway, I am 18 years old and I’ve had social anxiety disorder pretty much all of my life that worsened in high school. I also struggle with depression. In my last year of high school, I went to see a psychologist who was trained in cognitive behavioral therapy. Now, I don’t know where you’re from or what kind of coverage you have, but if it’s at all possible for you to have cognitive behavioral therapy with a psychologist, go for it! CBT basically challenges you to change your behavior or attitude towards things through a systematic procedure – and it’s centered around you, so you can work as fast or slow as you want – to reach your goal of getting over your fear.

But to be honest, if you’re goal-oriented enough and dead set on getting over this, you could probably do it without a therapist. If you have the money, go to a Chapters or Coles bookstore and pick up a self-help book. I have one called “Shyness and Social Anxiety Workbook: Proven, Step-by-Step Techniques for Overcoming Your Fear”. This book was recommended to me by my psychologist and we used it a lot as a guide while doing my CBT. I found it extremely helpful and I still look at it every now and then – even though I am almost completely over my social phobia! Purchase the book, read through it, fill out the self-assessment tests and analyze your fear(s). Then, with the help of the book, create a plan for change. It will give you a lot of great examples to give you gradual exposure to various social situations that you find difficult. But you have to be willing to put yourself out there. I had a lot of trouble with the ‘embarrassment factor’. Sometimes it was so bad that I’d be afraid to talk out of fear that I’d be laughed at for saying something stupid. I was afraid to wear things in case people thought I looked weird. One of my CBT experiments was to wear something outrageous in public – like a shirt backwards and inside-out paired with bright yellow plaid pants. I’ll admit that it was really awkward walking around the mall knowing how crazy I looked, but I felt so proud of myself afterwards. The book will give you better examples and you don’t have to push yourself into doing something outrageous just yet. Start with small steps, be positive, be yourself and most importantly, remember that not everyone is judging you and the majority of people are not interested in your flaws.

Good luck!

It may not be as simple as social anxiety.
Are you on any medicine for anything?
Have you experienced a traumatic event?
It could be neurological or a variety of other things.
I would suggest speaking to a Dr about it.

See a psychiatrist and get meds, if warranted. See a therapist to teach you behavioral coping techniques.

Well, my mother says she has it and her mother,too. I’m not sure how it exactly started but, I was in this situation where this person threatened me to the point of tears.

I have social anxiety as well. I know that staying in makes it worse and that going out and facing the fears, as terrifying as they are, does help…but it’s a slow road and from my experience the minute you go back into hibernation it gets worse again…you have to keep going.

@ChocolateCoveredStarfish some useful advice for me also…thank you x

Would like to add though that many things have contributed to mine and traumatic events a plenty… I’m going to the doctor tomorrow to see what he can do…although we ultimately have to find the courage to get out there…even going to the doctors is traumatic enough…but it’s a step. All the best @projectilevomit keep us updated x

you should smoke weed and learn to better relax around people