Have you changed over the years?

I am going downhill. For awhile I was a pleasant person, easy to be around, helpful, yada, yada. I found that just too much work and have reverted :(

Extremely shy with low self esteem to moderate shyness and much more self esteem.
Lover of 90s rap to lover all all genres except for country.
Was unaware of my surroundings, to traveling, gaining new experience, and an appreciation for life in general. I did not care about much, but now I follow international relations all the way to religion, neuroscience, sociology etc.
Christian (only because I was a kid), agnostic, atheist.

I changed from a shy, sweet, and scared girl into a woman who could give a fuck less about most things. I used to be a Christian, because of the people I was raised with, and now I’m an Atheist. I was very naive and didn’t care about my academics, but now I am strong-willed and ambitious. I was very ugly when I was a kid, too.

Kind of that bullshit generic ugly duckling into a swan type thing.

Over the years (demonstrated by relative progressions):

Anxious -> Depressed -> Confident
Christian -> atheist -> agnostic/Sufi wannabe
Republican -> Ultra liberal/almost commie -> libertarian
Wanted to be a therapist -> wanted to be a lawyer -> want to be a professor
Straightedge -> mildly indulgent -> hedonist
More interested in writing -> more interested in visual art -> back to writing again
Practically asexual -> timidly blossoming -> still timid with a kinky and flirty streak
Soccer player -> airsoft player -> target shooter

I like country music (not pop country, the good kind. I always said I liked all music but country. Give me some Willie Nelson and I’m a happy camper now.) and I don’t take shit from anyone. I worry a lot less about the little things too. I’ve changed for the better. =)

I no longer give people the benefit of a doubt but initially. Once someone screws up and I see it was done with carelessness or maliciousness then I write them off, they become a lot less important and I don’t beat myself up or give in to pressures of forgiveness and patience. Time is precious, years are precious, my energy is precious so I want the best people around me to have the most of it. Done.

What specifically does this mean? No more trips to see relatives out of state that could care less or are just fine with a phone call now and then instead. No trying to endear myself to others with interest in them or catering to them once I accept I’m inconsequential to them. No socializing with people just for the sake of appearances or out of boredom.

.

I can say that, fundamentally, I am the same person today I was at 27—10 years ago. I have less angst and I have become a bit more open with people, and I have become so much better at letting things go, but basically I’m the same me.

I am very different now than I was as a child/adolescent. But that’s obvious, of course.

COOKIE BOY vs. COOKIE MAN

boy: thin, shy, not confident
man: large, loud, confident

boy: Catholic alter boy
man: agnostic, likely atheist

boy: ignorant of the world
man: seen a lot of the world

boy: loves cookies, reads comics
man: loves cookies, reads comics

There were the obvious changes of puberty. ;)
Music: I’ve become more open to any kind of music, when I used to be strickly Screamo, and metal.
Hobbies: I got into writing, and photogrophy. I quit doing choir. I started running.
Thinking: I’m not sure. It was never a drastic change. It happened slowly. But looking back to how I used to think I realize I’ve grown up a lot since my parents divorced. I am in no way an adult yet, but I’m less of a child than I was. I think things through more. My thoughts seem darker now, that I’ve seen what mankind really does…
I think time caused the change.
I lost my family. That’s gonna change a person. There’s gonna be a hole where family used to be.
I lost my best friend. That sure as hell changed me. But I realize now, when the begginning starts, so does the end. Sometimes you break things to where you can’t fix them. No compass, no map, can take you back.
I think it’s for the better. I like myself now, and I like the way I see things… For the most part.

I got bigger!

And less patient but more resigned. I snort and sigh. I’m more confident.

I have a lot better idea about what I need/want and whether or not I’m getting it.
I have a lot better idea when I’m upset what to do about it.

I’m much more of a homebody,

I laugh more.

Back problems when I exercise. It takes longer to recover. I ignore it as best I can, but I realize my limitations require more effort to create the same performance.

I got bipolar disorder a few years back. I changed drastically. I don’t read books or watch television any more. I have a lot of relationship problems. I have become more empathetic. All the people I like seem to be mentally ill. I can’t stand stability any more and will do anything to create trouble and intensity in my life. I love it when things are very intense and very real and seem to matter a lot. Sometimes as a matter of life and death.

I’m crazy, but in a sane way. Don’t know if that makes sense to anyone who hasn’t been here. Maybe there’s a magic pill that will turn me back into what I was before, but I don’t think so. Once you’ve started down this road, even if it was involuntary, it’s like being on an Alice In Wonderland road. Not matter which way you turn, you’re still going in the same direction.

Well ever since my being was sent on earth I can say that I’ve changed very very much over the years. I always think between 6,7,8 you start developing more. As in growing into an actual personality. But since then and going into high school and into my teenage years now. I have changed. And I keep changing, but that’s because of the puberty part. But I mean yeah I’ve changed drastically over time I always manage whether it be from the good or bad…Majority from the bad. But music wise I have definitely changed at, went from mostly hip-hop and rock/R&B, to Metal, rock, hard rock, hard metal, and techno. But I still have my other side to me with the hip-hop, rap and R&B. But I’m also mixed with 90s,80s, 70, and sometimes 60s music which I love also. Personality wise…I have I’m still shy, but I’m more…calm and mellow, but I’m only like that so I can hide my feelings away from others. But there are some personality traits I can’t let go. But I’ve had many experiences to lure me away from what I use to have or be like I guess. The one major one is me breaking up with my ex awhile back…And The other side…Me getting a girlfriend and us being happily together for almost (coming up 26th) 5 months. But I only assume that my growth and maturity is going its own course, and that my path has already been decided. I just need to take the right ones to get to it.

I wanted to add how much I changed from who I was with my ex SO. I’m stronger and almost back to the Faye I used to be. What happened to me with this man was a sad thing and I’d bet a lot of people are permantly changed because of mates. I know my trusting has taken a blow, I’m more cynical and bitter. I’m getting the laugh back, that’s the best.

Yes, I have changed drastically over the years.