I get the feeling that most, if not all, of her knowlege about periods may have come from the school, otherwise she would know that tampons are perfectly safe if you don’t leave them inside for 8 hours, you have to change them more often. Were you the one who taught her about menstruation and how to properly insert, change and dispose of her pads? Or did you, or the school just give her some pamphlets and hope for the best. Even if she is only 10 years old, she should be old enough to understand how sanitary pads are used, and how often they should be changed and how they should be cleanly and discreetly disposed of.
Me and my friends were given a 2 week course at school (at aged 11) about where babies come from and what menstruation is and how to deal with it. Then, when I got my period, my mother showed me how to use and dispose of pads (even though I had an outdated booklet from my school that showed sanitary belts and tampons on the end of long sticks! They already had adhesive pads by the mid 70’s and no one from my age group ever used a belt and those stick style tampons had long disappeared, they already had the applicator type). If your daughter was given a class in school, she may have been given some information, which she blew out of proportion (about toxic shock syndrome) or the embarrassing topics of how to attach a pad to the inside of your panties and how to rinse blood out of your panties if you have a leak, and how to wrap a pad in toilet paper so that no one can see it, may have been skimmed over, too quickly. Most girls in my class would never had dared to utter a word or ask a question to our teachers, even if we had been uncertain. Unless your daughter has some type of developmental issues, that you haven’t mentioned to us, then she is probably just not “in the know” about how all of this stuff works. You need to sit her down and tell her and show her, step by step. Then hang out around the bathroom door and ask her if she needs any help in there. If she says no, hang around anyway, and immediately go in there and check. If the bathroom isn’t clean, she gets to go back in there and clean it. Keep doing this over and over until she gets it right. If for some reason, she can’t do it, I would suggest having her evaluated by her pediatrician.
You should also talk to her about possibly using tampons in the future. I didn’t want to use them right away, because my hymen was not broken and it physically hurt me to try to insert them. I tried again, when I was about 15, and broke the hymen with a tampon while inserting it in the shower. If she wants to try using tampons, she will either need to break the hymen herself, which could be very scary, and slightly painful, or you can take her to a gynecologist and have them do it. The gynecologist can also show her how to properly insert a tampon. It needs to be put in far enough so that it clears the pubic bone and then kind of sits on the edge of that bone (both to keep it inside, and so that you can’t feel it). She also need to learn how not to panic, if she thinks the string has come off or she can’t find it. This involves being able to be comfortable enough with your body to root around in there for a few minutes, and get a little bloody, until you locate the string.
If she is suffering from cramps, the only thing that ever worked for me, was Ibuprofen. But sometimes, laying on the floor on your side in a fetal position can work to help ease the pain, along with the medicine. Tell her to take the medicine at the first sign of cramps and not to wait until they get full blown. I’ve always been able to knock them out before they got bad. But when I was 12, they didn’t have Ibuprofen and Midol didn’t help at all. Asprin worked pretty well for many years, until it stopped working for me. If she takes Ibuprofen, make sure she eats a little bit of something, or else it will give you a stomach ache.