[NSFW] For women: How long do you wait until you have sex?

I think they say the average is 36 hours three days more or less less than more of course. Most don’t really wait until there is an ”official” benchmark, in fact that could be counter productive. Since sex is one of the top 3 things in many relationship they want to find out how good they believe ot it going to be before any ”official” benchmark.

For me, when I’m in a new relationship, I wait until I can imagine that the person is who I want to spend the rest of my life with.

The rule that I have been employing in my last few dating situations is: no sex until I know for sure what I want that from that person (friends with benefits? casual dating? real relationship?), I know what that person wants from me, and I know that in both cases it includes sex.

I don’t have a problem with things like casual sex, but I think it is important for everyone to be on the same page.

Depends on what I’m feelin with the person.

Yep, I’m with @redfeather

I don’t have some stalwart protocol. May be sooner, may be later.

Oh dear. I still haven’t even come close (I’m 19), which isn’t really weird yet at my age, but I have a feeling this is going to be a problem for me. I’m fairly paranoid about health related things, so the thought of getting something else chronic (STD) and having it be my fault is unbearable. And I’m terrified of getting pregnant. My body couldn’t handle it at all, yet I would feel awful if I ever got an abortion (I’m pro-choice but I never want to have to abort a fetus myself). I know that there are ways to be safe, but even the possibility is so frightening to me, I think it’s going to be a while before I manage to work through all this anxiety and it ever happens for me. I’m gonna be OLD and I’m going to need to trust the person a lot. My future boyfriend is going to be so frustrated. XD

I agree with @coloma- no set protocol, except I’m on a celibacy kick for a while. That part’s stalwart :D

@linguaphile@linguaphile
Same here, the only sex I am having is with the turbo jets in my hot tub
I should make them wait a little tonight. haha

@Coloma I don’t have a hot tub or turbo jets… maybe I should saunter to the turbo jets bar and see what’s available, then make it wait. IF I wasn’t celibate, I think I have a big enough ‘red flag dictionary’ that I would know almost within 5 hours what I would be getting and whether it would be worth the ride or not. The question is whether I’d consult the dictionary or choose the illusion… if y’know what I mean?

@linguaphile@linguaphile
Yes, brings to mind a saying I love, ” I will always cherish my initial misconceptions of you.” lol

@Coloma Does pot make you horny?

In my case till I got married lol, and haven’t ever done it with anyone else, nor do I want to. Hubby has been told repeatedly that I get to shuffle off this mortal coil first.

@wundayatta

Not especially, it makes me philosophical, creative and gets me thinking about how DO they make Rainbow Sherbert. LOL

Haha, I usually go for it on the same day. Most of my relationships had started online so we have built up a “relationship” before we meet. When I meet the person if I feel a connection I might go for it on the same day, if not then I might not waste my time.

With my first we dated for 3 months before I did anything. I’ve only had 3 encounters, and all of them have been with people I was serious about.

I guess it depends on your feelings towards the dude.

I am a virgin and I always think of thinks like this. I am promising myself to wait until I feel ready. It may take days, weeks, months or even years. I am trying to go with my flow and not other people’s flows.