Boring question #47: Why are men more at peace with their hair over women?
The time I spent working in the salon I was greatly amazed by the amount of women that seem unhappy or less satisfied with their hair. If they had short hair, they wanted it to grow longer. If they had straight hair, they envied those with curls or waves, and those with curls or waves wanted their hair to smooth and straight. The ones who were blond, wanted to be darker and those with jet-black raven hair wanted lighter. I can’t remember being around any men who wished he had hair different than his own, or the hair that another man or celebrity had. What makes men more at peace and happy with the hair he was born with so long as he is not going bald, over women?
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I think in the past men were more satisfied with their hair, not sure if that is true of young men now. I think young men are far more invested in their looks than they were even 10 years ago.
For instance, my son spends as long if not longer ‘doing his hair’ than my daughters or I do. He isn’t alone either. His friends seem equally engaged in hairdressing activities. My son straightens his hair, dyes his hair, wears enough hair spray to cause a significant rise in global warming not to mention being at risk of bursting into flames if he walks near a spark. He is single-handedly keeping gel and other hair product manufacturers in profit too.
The Bieber has a lot to answer for….....
Women are targets of beauty ads, they grow up paranoid in a culture that says that they have to look beautiful, because little else counts. That’s why they are always comparing themselves to each other and getting jealous, and getting obsessed with their hair, the color of their hair, the way they style it, how it looks indoors, outdoors, in space, etc. I’m just content with a good shampoo, a comb, and a little Brylcreem, and I’m out the door beaming. Lol.
there you go with that beamer again
The… mighty… powerful… Wizard of Oz! Media!
I can see where @Bellatrix is coming from on this. Men are becoming more prissy these last few years not sure when that all started. Whats getting me is the clear nail polish and frosted tips. How are they supposed to change a flat tire when they step out all looking that way?
@woodcutter Lol. I wasn’t even conscious of that. Um, I could have said “and I’m out the door re-cycling my beer”, but I don’t think that would have gone too well with the Brylcreem. One shiny, the other frothy. Yeech.
@woodcutter Yeah, a man can look good and well-groomed without a lot of “prissying” like you said. I can’t stand the metrosexual guys, with their frilly shirts, their over-gelled spiky hair, and their handbags and skin care products and eyebrow contouring tools! Men used to look great in the 1950s and early 1960s without a lot of overdoing. Just a good clean haircut, decent clothes and handsome shoes, and a little dab will do ya! :D
@woodcutter Men are becoming more prissy these last few years not sure when that all started. Whats getting me is the clear nail polish and frosted tips. Guys are wearing nail polish now!?! Back when I was in school getting your tips dyed would have got you an ass beating after school but nail polish might have gotten a can of whoopass opened on you before classes ended. With guys it was “slick back and Dippity Do” and you were out the door. Maybe this extra attention to details like that was ushered in by the age of the metrosexual?
@woodcutter But I think a lot of men are afraid to even “make an attempt” to look good, for fear of being labelled effeminate or gay. There’s nothing wrong for a guy wanting to look good for his girl. For heaven’s sake, in the animal world, it’s almost always the male who looks better than the female! He has to if he’s going to catch the girl! Lol. Besides, I’d rather look like a dude than a total slob, and my wife would want that too. So you guys out there, don’t be afraid to look your best! Just don’t overdo it and get all prissyin’ like @woodcutter said! Ha!
@woodcutter Hehe. Definitely not. He’s the epitome of the metrosexual male. The product of the 1980s. I think that’s when guys started prissyin’. Yeech.
men should just be themselves…just don’t be scratching your balls when you go out, that is too unkempt.
Definitely not. He’s the epitome of the metro sexual male. The product of the 1980s The Brits can pull that off though, it’s almost expected
I bet there were a lot of beer farts under that flowery shirt, prolly some of that recycled beer in the mix too. I think Nick looks bad ass there.
For the longest time at least until the 60s showed up, this was the quintessential men’s cut; short on the top 25% more on the top. Easy to maintain, splash on some water, some Dippity Do, and you were good to go.
Now that is pretty slick I could do that..if my hair wasn’t dirty grey with the temper of a wire brush. I like that “Mad Men” look. So retro goes perfect with the beehive doo. It would make porn so hot.
I think men have trouble enough making peace with their nether regions to have any energy leftover to worry about their hair…!
It’s true that “a certain percentage of men and boys” is becoming prey for the advertisers and the promoters of various hair care, skin care, fragrance and fashion products aimed at them – and to the growing number of women who demand that their partners “get in the same boat” with them on this. (And I have to admit that as “an observer” of media who notices things and tries not to be unduly influenced by them, I’ve noticed the trends.) But thankfully – in the US at least – this is a relatively small percentage. (I won’t deny that in some age groups and in some cultures, primarily urban, it seems, the percentages are higher.)
I shower with Ivory soap. I wash my hair with Head & Shoulders. I usually shave with whatever shaving cream was on sale at the time I bought it (unscented), or simply by lathering my face with soap. I brush my teeth with Colgate (because I’m used to it) in the plainest formula I can find. I don’t use mouthwash, after-shave, body oils or skin lotions (unless it’s for “treatment” of damaged skin) or fragrances of any kind. In fact, I don’t even use antiperspirant or deodorant (and you would not know that unless I told you).
I cut my (full head of) hair myself about six or seven times a year (clippers and a #4 comb – it takes a while to get the back right!, and I know it’s not perfect, but what is?) and I don’t color my grey-to-white hair. (I know that it’s time to cut my hair when it’s possible to tell that I haven’t combed it. I haven’t “combed my hair” in years, although I do have a brush on hand to treat stubborn cases of bed-head, when it gets long enough to be affected.)
I buy inexpensive clothing (but not shapeless or ugly), including second-hand and consignment stuff of good quality, and wear it until it’s unfit to wear out – and then I just wear it around the house.
I’m not alone in this. I see men all the time who (I’m sure – we don’t discuss it!) do more or less the same thing.
Despite all this, a lot of women seem to find me attractive (or invisible, and in that case who cares?), and children are not generally repulsed. Works for me.
I don’t know. I’ve known a couple if guys who have made…questionable hair choices in the name of vanity.
Comb-overs, tupets, weaves, dyeing – and quite a few shaved heads with matching goatees. All of it’s kind of desperate to me.
But then, I’m almost forty with a full head of curly hair with just a little grey. So who am I to talk.
As for the women, see @MRSHINYSHOES original answer. I mean, have you counted how many women’s hair color & shampoo ads are on in a single day?
False premise. If men were at peace with their hair or lack of it, there would not be toupees, shaved heads, or hair plugs.
@marinelife may be on to something. Culturally, men are not supposed to talk about things like their hair, etc..
For me though, I get my hair cut when my sideburns become wings. When I do get it cut, I get the sideburns as short as looks half decent so that I can wait as long as possible to get it cut again. Other than that, I think the best is to wear clothes that fit well but nothing fancy. I do come by hair but I spend about 30 sec doing it. For shower/bathroom products I buy the cheapest thing I can find (per unit) in 60 sec.
As for guys looking/being prissy, I would guess that there were always guys who wanted to do this but that they couldn’t get away with it because of fear of beatdowns/shunning.
Hair can make a big difference in how we are judged regarding beauty and sex appeal, so we obsess about it a little. On TV and in movies most of the women have a bunch of fake hair on their heads, and it is almost impossible for the average women to maintain her locks in the same way. Basically I would say it is a fact that keeping your hair from going gray keeps you looking younger. Hair is part of fashion. Hair color trends change over time.
Men do care about their hair. They have less to play with since generally they keep a shorter style, but they care if they go grey and they care if the hair starts falling out. There are men with curly hair who wish it was straight, etc. Men have less options with style and color if they work a typical coorporate job compared to women. Women in that situation can wear a color that would not happen in nature and it is ok (within reason) while a man cannot.
@marinelife Balding issues were exempted from the question at the end of the details section:
“What makes men more at peace and happy with the hair he was born with so long as he is not going bald, over women?”
I think it’s historically, culturally a matter of practicality. Men had to do what men had to do and not just their hair but their whole appearance reflected what is was they had to do. Women too… Except for the ‘upper’ classes women didn’t have the sorts of ‘beauty-aid’ resources we can take for granted today.
Keeping the hair out of the way was more important than appearance when it’s a matter of life-and-death (e.g. getting it caught in a machine).
I am enjoying reading the men’s responses to this question. I do think that the metrosexual trend is mainly an urban one. Think about it. In an urban area there is more competition for both jobs and women. Looks matter whether we like it or not. Personally I like to see that a man makes an effort to look good by wearing clothes that flatter and enhance his looks and not just throwing on whatever tshirt is halfway clean and running out the door. I think nail polish is going too far, too effeminate, but a manicure with buffed nails is nice. My husband has it done sometimes and it just looks like healthy, shiiny nails, not like a polish.
Girls start getting obsessed with their looks when they become interested in boys. They see the girls that boys are attracted to and try to model themselves on these popular girls. There are subtle (and not so subtle) messages coming from every direction that it doesn’t matter if you’re smart, funny, compassionate, talented, etc, that the way to attract boys/men is by your looks. We are kind of hypocritical as a society in that we are always saying it is inner beauty that matters and yet we give most of our attention and adulation to the “beautiful people”. Moreover, ugly people often get made fun of, especially in high school.
Hair is one of the easiest ways to change your looks dramatically. No surgery rrequired and if you mess up it will grow back! Sometimes people change their hair often out of boredom and not insecurity.
Hair requires maintenance more than a lot of other things. You can’t just let it go unless you are gifted with naturally beautiful thick hair. Maybe you are one of the lucky people who can do very little with their hair and it still looks good. Oh how I wish I were in that group!
I have known alot of men to freak out about losing theirs…. ;)
As has been mentioned previously, women are bombarded with the impression that they are always too fat, their boobs are too small, and all sorts of other things like that, so it’s no wonder that they are not satisfied with one of (if not the) first things people notice; their hair.
Us guys don’t get nearly as much “criticism” over our appearance, and many of us don’t even care if our fly is down. Most guys I know go for a low-maintenance haircut; some buzz-cuts that are too short to even bother shampooing, and some that you can just roll out of bed, ruffle it with your hands and be good. And then there are guys like me who are usually wearing a hat so it matters less anyways.
Now, I have worn nail polish before, but it was the nail wrap stuff with Kevlar fibers in it; I cracked my thumbnail with an 8p nail after a nailgun misfired.
@MRSHINYSHOES Bryllcreem? Seems a little too much effort for even me. Then again, I am a jeans-and-T-shirt type of guy who works a job that covers me in stuff and would ruin any clothes that don’t look like they are supposed to be covered in grease anyways.
Some are not. Including those without hair.
I wrote this for my balding ex husband, once upon a time.
- The bad haircut -
Thinning hairs upon my head
some cling to life and some are dead
she cut my fragile fronds so wrong
some too short and some too long
She set the blades to shear too short
and lopped the tower off my fort
a mule and plow might be preferred
to trample ‘cross my wispy herd
What evil scissors did she wield
to kill my sparsely planted field
silky stalks and tender shoots
torn from my scalp with dying roots
A seasons growth without a trace
harvested above my face
Hair today, gone tomorrow….. :-/ I think once men get past thirty & still have hair they relax a bit….. It’s only if they go bald in their twenties, as some of my friends have done, it becomes an issue… look at Wayne Rooney
:-) Thankfully I’m still thatched at forty three…..
I agree with @Bellatrix . I go out now, and I see guys everywhere with gleaming hair. It seems like they can’t stay away from hair gel.
I think that men in the old days probably didn’t care much about their hair, but nowadays guys care as much as the girls do.
I don’t think they really are. When I was a kid then adult men were either spending a good deal of time to choose from a dozen different buzz cuts and style of “slicking back” or else they were growing their hair to look like Jesus or rock “Jew Fro’s”. As a teen then the guys were trying all kinds of retro looks and punk styles. As an adult, most men I know are experimenting with hair growth foams/gels, modified comb-overs or shiney tops. I remember both my grandfathers constantly combing and getting trims to always look “neat”.
Men are satisfied with the same old hair style, color for 30 years. We just don’t care that much about our hair. If it turns grey and falls out no big deal for most of us.
@jerv Too much? Nah, “A little dab will do ya.” Not too late to start. :D
@FutureMemory About the time when guys started getting slobby and unkempt, and I started getting the girls! Sort of like the slick male sea lion bull who every once in awhile “sneaks” a great mating with one of the females while the rest of the sea lion bulls lazily lie on the rocks with their blubber sprawled and not really caring what’s going on. Lol!
I can see you as a sea lion
I remember Dippity-Do. It was huge in the 80s.
Speaking of huge, do any women still use Aquanet?
@cprevite Correction——a grunting, moaning bull sea lion! Lol.
@FutureMemory No, seriously, since I was in my early 20s, when I got into competitive swimming and long, even medium length hair was a hindrance to winning races. I found having neat, shortish hair was easy to groom. The Brylcreem lubricates my black hair from the ill-effects of chlorine, and it gives it a nice shine to match my shiny black leather men’s dress shoes! Lol.
I like @Hypocrisy_Central ‘s example of Ben Affleck. Ya know, back in the 50s and early 60s, almost all men had that look. It was sharp and masculine, yet not prissy, just simple and elegant without a lot of doo-doo. A man just had to go to the men’s room, get out his comb, and comb it in place and out he went. Like Archie Bunker sang in his song “The days when men were men”.... Nowadays, it’s either guys go in and don’t even look at themselves in the mirror (they sometimes don’t even wash their hands!) and walk out unkempt, or guys go in and primp and primp, get out the gel, primp and primp, then put lotion on their faces. Sigh! Lol.
@MRSHINYSHOES So you use Bryllcream? I’ve never found a gel that I liked. Honestly I’m a hair noob. I’ve generally kept it very short, other than the 8 years I had it in a ponytail.
@FutureMemory Yes I do. Been using it since I was in my early 20s, about 10 years ago. I don’t like gels, or hair paste. Too gooey and messy. Brylcreem goes on smooth and light, and makes my (what you called early 60s haircut—lol) manageable and slick. It also has a pleasant scent. Maybe that’s why it’s been around for so long. You’ll get a kick from this t.v. ad from the early 1960s—-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eoheekgI-Fs&feature=related
I keep my hair rather short for three reasons——I find it easier to take care of and groom, I swim a lot, so having short hair helps with the speed as I swim, and finally I have to keep my hair nicely trimmed for work.
The last time I had longish hair was back in junior high school. I used to have shoulder length hair. But I didn’t have a ponytail like you did. Would have looked like a Samurai. :D
@MRSHINYSHOES The next widget I go to sell I am hiring you as my spokesman! LOL
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Of course not all men are at peace with their hair more than women. For those who are—I’d say there are any number of reasons. Some never really think about their hair. It’s just there. They do the minimum necessary to keep it socially acceptable. For others, it’s a practical thing. They cut it short to stay cooler or to keep it from getting caught in the machinery or from dropping into whatever it is they are making.
Some guys do put some effort into it. They get a very specific hair cut. They have symbols shaved into it, or have it braided into cornrows or matted into dreads. Bald guys sometimes go to all kinds of lengths to get hair to grow where nature don’t want it any more.
I think that, in general, men are more likely to need to be presentable, while women need to be beautiful. Women often dress for each other, not for men. I don’t think men dress for other men or cut their hair for other men as often, or if they do, they do it in a different way; a manly way, whatever that is.
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