How easy do you bond with someone?

Quite easily. Just in case anyone hadn’t noticed, I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and be very open. I really like people generally and am quite trusting (without being stupid). I feel you have to be somewhat trusting and risk getting hurt or disappointed every now and then or you miss out on some wonderful experiences. Sometimes people do turn out to be quite different from my initial thoughts. That usually doesn’t bother me too much though because I prefer to take people as I find them and I try not to judge. Really though, I haven’t been too disappointed by the people I have met and I have met some fabulous people who I care greatly for. I am an optimist, I tend to view people from an optimistic stance.

Its always difficult at the very beginning when I am getting to know the person. For maybe a day or so. But then after that we are like twins! I am pretty open so I think that also helps.

Not easy at all and the older I get the longer it takes.

Difficult definitely. I find I have my walls up and am on my toes esp around a new person. I find being more aware of what I’m saying (only to try and be as genuine as possible).

It also depends on the personality of the other person. I take a lot of my cues from them. How weird/relaxed are they etc etc. Gotta work on this.

@Bellatrix I really admire people like you who can do that! Yay for you!

Thank you @Cruiser.

It depends on the person and what they do and are like.

The main deciding factor is if they are family, e.g. recently born or recently married. If you are family I’ll die to defend you from day 1, thats the rule. If you are family you are automatically fully accepted and liked, and bonding becomes very easy, something that is done in minutes.

Another big deciding factor is if you smoke weed. I no longer smoke weed, however, if you do, there is a much greater chance that I’m going to like you, just because there are certain things I’m safe assuming about you. I know I can depend on you to hear “cops” any time they turn a corner, I know you are likely to be more peaceful, and I know you will be open to talking about more or less any topic, as well as being ok with sitting there with me for 6 hours in total silence.

The other big factor, is if there is mutual physical attraction, this always tends to move things on, probably because it tends to get me acting more honest.

Not so easily. I have a few times bonded with people right away, but other times it takes a while.

Not very well, because I need to have that initial spark and chemistry, and I don’t get that with a lot of people.

I bond very easily, as I am open, trusting, trust-worthy; and I can generally get to a shared humorous moment pretty quickly. I used to consider myself a good judge of character, but this past year, I was very, very badly hurt with a relationship in which I had invested enormous trust and emotional energy over many years. I’m still processing the situation a bit, but I’ve not come to any clear answers. I know that when my heart argues with my head, my heart usually wins, and that’s not always a good thing.

“Any sort of relationship” I’m usually quite reserved…. I take a lot of coaxing. Maybe after a few weeks or months depends if I’m interested in getting to know someone or not. :-/
Still I take my time about it.

I would say quite easily because i am naturally very open and trusting and always try to be smiley and kind to people I don’t know. (though most of the time i’m too kind)

I do not bond with others very easily at all. I’m a very shy person and I usually need the other person to initiate conversation before I can open up at all. Even after that, I tend to keep my distance and be wary. I’ll make small talk but I won’t really get to know a person until I’ve been around them for a fair amount of time. However, once I am finally comfortable with a person, the relationship generally progresses fairly quickly.

I am reserved but I bond quite readily with the right people. As I have grown older the bonds I form are not as deep and strong as those I formed when young.

I usually don’t bond very easily. I don’t like getting close to someone.
Living in Alaska, people come and go a lot. So I try not to get close to people, beccause chances are they’re gonna move away soon, anyways…

I bond quite easily, I like talking to new people. Sometimes I’ll carry on a conversation with someone for about ten minutes without even knowing their name.

I’m either/or. My true nature is very friendly, open and interested in others and if I can communicate with someone- there’s no stopping me. I almost love my friends too much! I have to tell people to shoo me out when they’re out of steam, because I rarely run out of steam. <————see icon
However, on the opposite end, I can be extremely shy in public or tense situations and can seem aloof and angry. It’s usually because I’m trying to figure my environment out and don’t feel secure.

I like people quite easily, but bonding is another thing entirely. It tends to take a long time for me to share personal things with others.

Not too good, people always have to make the first move with me, and usually more than once. That’s not something I’m proud of mind you, I try and try to be more open and friendly but it never works. Then I just go and say i hate everyone and everything, but thats not really true.
Seems easier on the Internet, but that isn’t really the same, at least not to me.

Although the people I have bonded with in real life, I’m glad I did. :)

I did use under handed tactics worthy of a viper to get this one guy’s attention before though…and we ended up dating for two years. I’m glad I did that, too. :D

It can be immediate and very storng but that is rare. Although rare I feel like it is quite often the deepest kind. Other times I bond with someone by going through a crisis with them. In crisis mode people tend to drop their defenses and be more knowable. I have also bonded with someone over a small gesture of kindness or generosity. Sometimes it is a bond based on a shared enthusiasm or passion.
I often wish people could be more “real” and genuine. However to be honest, I am usually quite guarded myself. It is only when I feel that immediate trust and intuitive sense of connectedness with someone that I drop my defenses. That makes it infinitely easier to bond. I am shy but I try not to be fake. If you misrepresent yourself you have no chance of meeting the people who would love you as you really are.
Even if you try to be honest and real people often misunderstand you or underestimate you. People make snap judgements about you based on appearance. I try not to do this myself. People without much education can be wise and intelligent. College educated people can be stupid and ill informed. I look for the positive things in a person and try to understand and appreciate them.