Have you ever become friends with someone with whom you barely talked?

Yes, all the time. Happens at work, old school friends, new school friends, and here on Fluther ;)

Conversation is much like a dance for me. Some people are quick in and then out. But others stay for long periods. The latter are the ones who ultimately become friends.

Why not?

I liked your details. Let’s be friends?

Sure, all the time. Everyone is a potential friend. The way I see it all you need is a common thread (and everybody has something in common).

I think that is easier for younger people maybe? I see what you mean, and it has definitely worked for me, but I don’t think I could be satisfied with that now, as that would be reserved for making acquaintences, but not friends.

Absolutely! My best friend, who I am facebook married to, and I met at complete random, and well, are best of friends now.
I was heading to a party, out in “The Middle of Nowhere, Wisconsin” (River Falls), and the girl I was meeting up with had called me to give me directions. In the background I heard two guys talking, and asked who that was. She informed me that they were rugby players and that they were really cool, I just “had to meet them”. When I arrive, the guys (by the names of Crague and Drama, those are ther rugby nicknames. Backstory on these guys: we have only talked when we were beating the crap out of each other on the pitch, so our friendship isn’t exactly the best, and the only words we have exchanged are “F*ck you”, and “I’m gonna rip your head off”, and “keep talkin’ sh*t, and watch what happens”) are standing with my friend, and Instantly offer me a beer. Of course I acccepted and, we all started chatting. Out of nowhere Crague asked if I wanted to join him to the bars, and that the drinks were all on him. We got completely smashed, beyond belief, and then went to a fried chicken place across the street. After chicken we went to bed and woke up married on facebook.
Now he is my best friend and we talk often, and even drink together. Good times making friends with random people.

@MacBatman31
I read the first line of your long message then stopped-
What the hell is “Facebook Marrige”????????

@Tay122 On facebook you have a “Relationship Status” right? Well I put that I am married to someone that I am not married to in real life, and he is my best friend. Ergo: facebook marrige. Just like girls who say they are engaged to their best friends, we did it more as a mocking thing. I think. We were drunk.

I’m not sure what this question is getting at. Surely we have barely talked to everyone we meet for the first time.

How do I become friends with people? Usually I do shit with them. Sometimes that shit includes talking; sometimes it is only talking… or writing.

After that, it’s a question of whether we hit it off or now. I can’t tell you the formula for hitting it off with me.

The Marble Friendship Theory is still applicable in adulthood. It is just a matter of discovering a common ground, be it intentional or by accident.

There was a guy on another internet site that I chatted with once. The conversation didn’t last long, as be both became a bit peeved, and we went our separate ways. A few months later, our paths crossed again, and we ended up becoming friends on that site.

As for The Marble Friendship Theory, crisis can also bring strangers together. A young female hotel employee was on duty to man the phones before the hotel was officially open. Some contractors were in the process of installing furniture, and she offered to help. The elevator broke down, and they ended up spending the night stuck in the elevator together until someone rescued them the next morning. When I met this lady and she told me about it, she said that she is still in touch with the two guys, despite their moving on to other projects in other cities.

As for courting or going with the flow, it is both for me. It’s sort of amazing how many people I’ve become friends with, despite a preceding negative reputation, be it either caused by someone else or in my own mind. Sometimes, they turn out to be the strongest. See @MacBatman31‘s post.

I become friends very quickly. I guess I kind of court them in the sense that I invite them, offer my help, etc. But, it has to go both ways fairly quickly. I am not going to do all the asking, it has to feel very equal, very fast, or I am not into it. Once we spend more time together, I figure out if we are alike enough, or if I enjoy their company enough to become closer friends. Some of it has to do with where or how I meet them. Through another close friend there is an assumption I am going to like them similar to how I like my existing friend.

I’m very open to making new friends, but I’m very introverted and have been told that I appear to be very ‘stand-offish’ so it doesn’t happen that often. I really try not to be: I smile at people, if someone is having an open conversation nearby I’ll try to add something to it; but oh well.
Anyway, most of the friends that I do have came about by my hearing them talk about something I really liked and being like “Oh I love that too!” and then talking more about it before realizing we had other things in common. These were mostly in classroom settings.

I’ve made some friends at shows, but not friends that I hang out with, just that I’ll meet at future shows if we both happen to be going. Usually they live too far away for the friendship to turn into anything more than occasionally talking online or seeing each other at future shows. Ho hum.

I never deliberately go out to make a friend, it just happens, and more rarely as I get older.

I generally go with the flow until I know whether they are someone I don’t mind being tethered with. But I neither force or reject the idea. I tend to take things slow. Its not like I’m in a friend making contest nor do I care how many friends I have or don’t have. Like with anything in life.
I look for quality not quantity.

Yes, some friends (not much, just a few) I befriended at the first meeting, without much talking going on.
They are the soulmate kind of friendships, where we both felt that we connected, that ‘it is good’.

Yes actually most of my closest friends right now are people I never spoke to for the first 6–7 years that I knew them in school. Then either due to circumstance or coincidence I spent an evening talking to them and now they are my life. So it does happen and it just reinforces the idea that you really should not judge a book by it’s cover.

Yep, several times as a matter of fact.

On a pen pal site, yes. We just write back and forth, no talking.

Some dude I’ve crossed paths with on fluther for years has lately taken to staying in Saturday nights and watching the West Wing so he can pay endless attention to me.

Yes, of course! I’m open to getting to know lots of different people – if we become friends, all the better!

Yes, happened to me in school. There was this girl in our class that barely ever talked, I didn’t really pay much attention to her. But then, one day ( it was winter ) I came into school wearing a great big coat with a fur hood. I was going around school wearing just the hood on my head when she stopped me and said she liked my coat, at lunch time. The conversation then went on to music and we became quite close friends after that.

To become friends with someone without talking he either has to do something important for me or to be in the need for real help and then appreciate what I do for him/her.
It’s less likely that I will befriend someone whom I rarely talk because I can’t see him/her as a friend if I don’t know how they think, how they will react etc

My best friend in the world is just such a case. We were next door neighbors, among the very first people to move in to a brand new housing development. We’d cross paths while out getting the mail and stuff, and were on a nodding, “Hey, how ya’ doing?” kind of basis for quite a while, never going any deeper than that.

She had a get together at her house for all the people in our new neighborhood once our whole block was occupied, and I ended up staying late to help her clean up afterward. We talked for like 5 hours straight, and have been best friends ever since. More than 20 years, now.