How would you feel about a family member dating someone of a different race?

Way cool with that!! No problemo!

Uhm….I live in 2011, so….....why are you asking this question lol. I don’t care. Half of my cousins are mixed anyway. I think my family made a hobby out of it lol.

I’m sorry to hear about your son, I’ve dealt with that too. I backed off then, but now I’d probably just confront them.

No one cared when I did.No one cares that my niece is..

@Blackberry That was my first thought. But where I live in small town Oklahoma I guess this small minded way of thinking is still alive and thriving.

Oh for crying out loud! Who, exactly, is “forbidding” this relationship?

As far as I believe, we are all one. I’m great with love. Love needs no color definition.

Color makes no diffrance to me, how they treat them on the other hand is a whole new subject.

@Dutchess_III It’s her Father.

I know it sounds corny, but I believe we’re one race, the human race. But obviously not everyone feels that way.

Not sure why I even asked the question here, I guess I needed to feel like I wasn’t alone. Everyone I’ve came in contact with here has been very open-minded. I guess that’s why I’m here.

Ohhhhh! Oklahoma…...It all makes sense now. I think 70% of the racist trolls I’ve seen on the internet have been from Oklahoma. Oops, sorry, I was thinking of Ohio, but still…...lol.

@Blackberry It’s hard for me to even understand their way of thinking here, since I’m from a big city (San Diego) originally. So I guess when faced with it, it still throws me for a loop.

If race is a problem, then my kids and grandkids are a MESS! It all started with me, a white girl, and I mixed it up with a 1/8th Indonesian and my kids came out all dark and sloe eyed, and then my daughter mixed it up with 1 Mexican and 1 white guy (brother and sister do not match!) and now my son’s mixed it up with a white girl…whatever are we to do? I just can’t seem to get the interior decorations in my house right!

@JustJessica Ah hell. Yeah. Oklahoma. We’re in Kansas. I manned the county fair for the Democrats last weekend. I met our state rep, Ed Trimmer. We got to talk quite a bit. I thought it would be cool to offer people the chance to take their picture with “Obama” (a big print they had) like I had in my most recent Av…..and he said most people in Kansas would be agahast because of the race issue. They’re racist. I was floored. Kansas is a racist state. This means….I can’t be friends with @Blackberry anymore and I don’t know what to do!!! : (

@JustJessica It’s hard for me to understand it too, and I was raised here in Kansas.

Not only should it be ok, it should be encouraged. There are so many benefits to it. I think it would make wars less likely if it were more common. People saying: “I’m not going to fight the Japanese, my brother is married to a Japanese girl” and things of that nature.

You some times get to learn another cultures way, and if not you at least are more likely to meet people you would not meet otherwise.

Then on top of that you have the good DNA mixing thing going on when it comes to kids.

Hey, I’m from Ohio and I am definitely not a racist troll. :P

It’s utter nonsense that anyone would try to interfere. I find it incredibly sad that this is even an issue in this day and age, when will we as a society move past this sort of thing?

PS, @JustJessica nice to see you!

It wouldn’t bother me. I have some older family members that might be bothered by it because they were raised with the “stick to your own” views, but that’s their problem, not mine.

Happened a lot and it didn’t bother us. It bothered the other families. We couldn’t do anything about it and eventually they stopped dating but it wasn’t nice to hear “they are different .. better stick to your kind”.

At this point dating outside race/ethnicity in my family is hard to accomplish. I just can’t believe anyone cares about this anymore. Sigh.

@ANef_is_Enuf Nice to see you too! Looking beautiful as always!

No problem here. An aunt I thought would have a hard time with it, has a son she idolized. He married a girl of a different race and my aunt’s attitude changed entirely. It didn’t hurt that the lady in question is very bright, beautiful and a thoroughly good person. Their grandson is the apple of her eye. In this way, family by family, things change. It will happen for gay people too. It just takes time.

Since I do, it would be tough to apply a different standard to the kids.

When I started dating someone, my dad would always ask “Is she white?”.
When I said “no”, (japanese) he was quite upset with me.
I don’t put those restrictions on my kids.

It is unbelievable, he, that this still is an issue?
When I came home with my woman, my parents said nothing.

The older generation….well. Some excuses may need to be allowed. Rick and I had been together 8 years so I know him and I knew his family. I knew his dad. Well, one day we made a “business” trip to his hometown in SE Kansas and stayed with his dad like we’d done a thousand times. This time, though, Rick insisted that his dad watch American Idol. His dad was about 85 at the time. They were down to about 8 finalists. Dad, who’s pretty damn sharp for 85 (still is at 89) watched one particular contestant then said, “Wow. She’s pretty good. But she doesn’t stand a chance. She’s colored.”
I almost fell out of my chair. I looked at Rick. He was shell shocked too!
The contestant that day was….Jordan Sparks!!! I just LOL’d merrily when she won!

Thing is…that’s just the “way it was” in the 20’s, when he was born clear into the late 70’s, when he was in his 40’s and 50’s…but the girl’s dad isn’t 80 or 90 and he should be ashamed of himself.

I wish that could happen. I live in a society where most ‘cross-breeding’ between races is seen as unethical. I must also state that, however, many people from my country would like to have a Caucasian/Caucasian-hybrid offspring! Caucasian are seen as good-looking and attractive creature.

A caucasian-hybrid-creature. Strangest comment I’ve heard all day. Wow.

I sometimes use the word ‘hybrid’ to describe a cross between races, though I hope I use another much more appropriate word. But yes, we call it ‘hybrid’ in the language of my country.

As long as they keep to same sex dating, I could care less what race they date . . .

I can almost excuse the “older” generations, but the last two generations should be hip to the game by now. There will be no superior super race EVER. Just a bunch of humans that look a little different from each other.

I want a hybrid!

@FutureMemory Prius baby ftw.

@FutureMemory Go find a mate from other race! Your offspring would be rare specimens and well-sought by the society, at least here, in my country.

@Your_Majesty Fuck yeah!

Hello Dahlin’ and thank you for asking this question. As an old person, here is my thought process. Technically, there is no such thing as ‘race’. We are all part of the same species. Until we learn to stop judging people by the color of their skin and not for their abilities, we are stuck in a sad place.

When I was young, I asked Mom if she would be upset if I dated someone who was black. She said, ‘No, but I would worry about it if you had children of a mixed race and what they might have to endure.”

Move ahead many years. My niece married a man from Korea, and Mom stood by his side when he received his US citizenship. She also welcomes their child (her great grandchild) into her house and dotes on him. She also welcomes her daughter-in-law who is from Colombia, as well as her existing children. So does the rest of our family. And if it helps, we are from a small town in rural Virginia.

Until we can recognize the value in people for who they are and not judge them for color of their skin, we will continue to live in a shameful cultural environment. If the US really wants to call itself a “Melting Pot”, then we need to walk the talk.

@Your_Majesty Would the hybrid people that are visiting as tourists get a lot of sexual partners in your country?

I’d be 100% fine with it. Why should it matter?

@Pied_Pfeffer I wanted to give you many GA’s but it will only allow me to do it once. So GA!

@Seelix You’re right, It shouldn’t matter.

@Blackberry Hybridized people make the best lovers, so of course they would.

@Pied_Pfeffer Was it for me? I know and acknowledge that human regardless of their ‘race’ and physical differences are from the same species, it’s just that I use the word ‘race’ to differentiate people from ‘different bloodline’, like Asian, Caucasian, etc all for general purpose.

Oh. I completely forgot that my little sister’s last boyfriend was a black man. In case my avatar doesn’t make it obvious, we’re of Eastern European descent.
That is how much of a non-issue it is in my family. So much so that I totally forgot.

@ANef_is_Enuf I forget too, until some small minded jerk reminds me!! :-)

btw—what they say about black guys…you know…

I guess I have to stand up and give a big shout-out to the parents, such as Ricks’, and such as mine , who were born prior to 1940 (And Dad was born in Ok and raised in Texas in the 30’s, 40’s and 50’s) and who managed to raise non-racist children anyway.

@Your_Majesty No, dear heart. It has nothing to do with your post. In fact, I still use the term ‘race’, as we are all familiar with it. For example, in my post, I used nationalities (Korean, Colombian), yet anyone reading it would know the implication of the color of my relatives’ skin, as well as mine from the avatar.

In my little world, we would all be oblivious to skin color, we would get over the injustices of the past, and we would be more open and accepting to the cultural differences that will surely always exist. In the meantime, it is a pleasure to observe the world grow smaller by making personal connections with people different than us.

Of course not seeing how I often date outside my race. My parents and relatives of course do have a problem with it, they’re racists. Anyway, I’m sorry about your son’s experience, it’s hurtful.

@Simone_De_Beauvoir you date non-Russians?? Oh mercy!

I don’t see why it should matter. True love knows no race.

Nope, not even a little bit.

@Dutchess_III I used to date Russians long ago. It just doesn’t work anymore.

I was just thinking to myself that if I married someone that wasn’t from California I would consider our children hybrids, of sorts. ;)

You… y-you mean, li-li-like different from the human race?

Have Aliens landed in your yard?

@FutureMemory That’s so true; now that I think of it, I maybe a little prejudice, because I really don’t want to breed with anyone from New Jersey D:

I seriously just posted a status on Facebook about aliens landing in my yard. Now I’m creeped out.

@Pied_Pfeffer I thank you for your beautiful reply!

@Blackberry Only if you’re a sexually good-looking hybrid (and from Caucasian bloodline). This is true, whether you believe it or not one of the main reason why many local girls want to got to famous beaches filled with Caucasian (such as Bali) is because they want to ‘peek’ hot and alluring male Caucasian in their swimsuit, and if possible, hooked up with them. I even crave for one… Oh no forget what I just said!

they want to ‘peek’ hot and alluring male Caucasian in their swimsuit, and if possible, hooked up with them. I even crave for one…

LOL

@Your_Majesty I’m dying to know where you live. This is some of the most unusual stuff I’ve ever read on Fluther.

Just giving the father the benefit of the doubt here, fathers are very protective and very concerned about who their 16 year old daughters date, about protecting their daughters in general. You haven’t given many details but are you absolutely sure it’s purely about race and not about the father trying to protect his daughter from the racists, and there are still plenty of them out there sadly, protecting her from people who still might be seriously bothered by interracial dating?

I’m not sure about race… I mean I don’t believe that skin pigmentation is genetically relevant at all. Now there is ethnicity based on culture, sure. What do I think of that? If a person in my family was dating someone ethnically different than me, so what? We could use some culture. People are people. And we’re all African Apes and there’s more genetic difference between two African people (from different areas of the very large continent then) an African person and say a person of European decent.

I mean my dad remarried someone from Kenya and I was happy about that, now that she’s my stepmom… I dunno. It’s probably just because step-moms inspire that meh feeling. “Race” / Cultural difference doesn’t matter to me. What matters is that they are good people.

I don’t really believe in the concept of race, but I’m a part of the privileged group with so-called ‘white’ status. I mean yes, I’m pale as fuck but I’m not “white,” I digress. I don’t discriminate against people less pale than me, except of course the people with a spray tan or other faux tanning orangeness. No one in my family is allowed to date orange people! There I said it… Ok are you happy now? I’m such a bigot. :p

Damn you, white man. Stealing our ladies, even in hybridization….lol!

@lillycoyote I gave you a GA before I even started reading your post..gave you 5 more after I read it. Always spot on, girl.

@ANef_is_Enuf I live in Indonesia, that’s why I mentioned Bali. But this is just for male Caucasian, I don’t know for female Caucasian, I guess the local men aren’t so crazy about them.

Oh. :\

@Your_Majesty Hey! We’re probably related by marriage and my kids are probably related to you by blood! I mean, all Indonesians are related, right?? And everyone in the country knows each other, right??!!

@Dutchess_III You’re such a lurve knee-jerk. The additional 5 GAs you gave me after actually reading my post aren’t showing up. You better cough them up sister or I’m going to demand my money back or I’m going to demand something, I don’t know what but there will be whining, tantrumming (1 m or 2?) and stomping of feet, you can bet on it.

THERE’S ONE LILLY! Man…I haven’t had to deal with this kind of terrorism since my youngest was TWO

Seeing as I live in the 21st Century, I wouldn’t have any issue with it.

@Dutchess_III Did you say your kids have Indonesian spouse? I never know that. They must be your sons then. Actually, I’m not from ‘Melayu’ bloodline (major Indonesian race), I’m from the minority race, an Asian, an attractive one, actually.

Look, date who you want. Race doesn’t matter at all.

It has not caused me any problem, whether it was my sister, my brother, or my son doing the dating. It would bother me if it were my husband; I prefer that he not date anyone but me.

@lillycoyote I know the father said NO you can’t date him because he’s black. That’s pretty plain and simple. That’s all I know.

@JustJessica I think in this situation, you just have to teach your son empathy for this girl. She’s growing up in an oppressed home.

I’m fine with her dating anything higher than Asian.

@ANef_is_Enuf

“A caucasian-hybrid….”

I drive a Caucasian hybrid, and it gets great gas mileage!

@JustJessica That sucks. I hope the daughter turns out OK. There’s no excuse for that kind of ignorance…except for the fact that it exists.

@Your_Majesty My ex-husband, the kid’s father, is 1/8th Indonesian. My Mom is Dutch…her parents immigrated from Holland in 1920 or whenever. Mom spoke of “Black Dutch.” The ‘Black Dutch’ were people who were “hybrids” (t use our new, convenient term!) of Indonesian’s and Dutch when the ”...Dutch East India Company that came under the administration of the Netherlands in 1800.” Wiki

My Mom had brown eyes but European features otherwise. My Dad had Hazel eyes (he was European from whenever, whereever.) I have two sisters. One of my sisters and I have blue, blue eyes, and the third sister has brown sloe eyes and darker skin. Growing up she was always asked if she was Native American. She isn’t….there has to an infusion of Indonesian “Black Dutch” on my Mom’s side in there somewhere that came out in my sister. And it’s there in me, even though it doesn’t show like that. BUT when I married a 1/8th Indo..Katie bar the door! My kids are BEAUTIFUL!!

Has @lillycoyote posted again? I GOTTA GIVE HER 4 MORE LURVES!!! OR I’M IN TROUBLE!!

@SpatzieLover Done and done…

@cockswain My blood pressure just jumped to an alarming level. Please explain your answer quickly before I call for an ambulance.

I am of mixed heritage. It would be absolutely silly if I were to judge either of my siblings, anyone from my extended family, any of my friends, or even a stranger for dating someone whose background was different from their own. My partner also has colourful genes. It’s not an issue to either of us.

It wouldn’t bother me. I’d be more concerned if my daughter started piercing her nose, belly button, ears, eyebrows, and tongue, multiple times, and disfiguring herself, than marrying someone of a different race!

I’ve got cousins who are Asian/white mixed, and my niece and nephew (my sister’s children) are half Chinese/Japanese and half German. They are really beautiful and bright kids, really cute!

@Pied_Pfeffer Just kidding. Ever since I saw an Onion article where Sarah Palin requested her children be watched by someone of at least Asian race or higher, I thought it was so funny I bust it out once in a while. Like an asshole.

@cockswain Your cruelty is unforgivable! Asian is one of the most beautiful creature on Earth. But of course, most of them are short.

All your base are now belong to us.

I would be completely fine with it.

@dutchess lll “The older generation”. I’m 66 and I don’t care.. Oops! Let me clarify: I care that I’m 66 (I’d rather be 33) .. I do not care what others (even family) chooses.. Like many have said, “This has alwways been the HUMAN race”..

I’d be much more concerned with his/her character, and background. We are a religious family, and unless you simply don’t care, it’s best to marry someone of the same religion, so I’d encourage that. I’d be fine if they came from a poor family, but I’d not be too happy if the inlaws werere Mafia or otherwise creepy. But skin color? No.

Edit: I forgot this is about dating, but my parameters are the same.

@Your_Majesty Hey I’m 5’10” tall! I don’t think that’s short! (hehe)

I don’t know if anyone’s noticed or not, mixed race people are HOT!

I would never see it is an issue. Also, I am generally extremely attracted to black people (I’m not black) but I am also aware that even if my family supports me to pursue such a mate, my relatives wont.

My son married a full blood, third generation Chinese woman. Her family wasn’t too happy about it, until they presented them with three sons.

I am the product of a marriage between a white man and a full blood Native American.

My grandson (½ Chinese) is currently dating a woman who appears to be what we now call African American (dark skinned).

I am pretty much color/ethnic blind when it comes to family members dating.

Wouldn’t matter to me if it were someone in my family or myself.

@chewhorse I’m thinking more along the lines of your parent’s generation.

I’ve got Mexican/Filipino cousins, Mexican/Filipino/Chinese/Japanese cousins, African American cousins, and an African American/Native American cousin. Safe to say my family is pretty color blind and wouldn’t give a damn what race the person was who dated me. Tell your son her father is a moron and he doesn’t have to deal with shit like that.

We were at Red Lobster a few months ago. There was a family gathering of some kind, seated at a loooong table. It was so cool. White gramma at one end, black gramma at the other…and every color in between, between the two!