What do you do when you miss someone and you shouldn't call them?

Go for a run/walk.

I did some walk earlier… but it doesn’t work…

Return my thoughts to the present. I prefer to live in the here & now.

Missing someone can be really hard when you know you shouldn’t pick up the phone…

Call someone else. A close friend can help you get through missing someone. One of my friends and I have done this for each other for years- we talk each other’s ear off about the most inane bullshit in our love lives. It really helps.

Why is it that you shouldn’t call?

Get lost in a tv marathon. Go to your movie store and find a t.v. show that you’ve heard was decent and rent the whole series.

Take your phone.
Switch it on.
Go to Contacts.
Search for his name.
Delete contact.

Go to Facebook.
Repeat above mentioned.

Yup – have used walks, cooking, watching tv, getting together with other friends…....

Haleth: I don’t have a close friend I can call to talk about this… Well, he told me nearly 2 weeks ago that we should stay friends… so I shouldn’t call him I know. If he’s interested in me he should call me…

Target practice is a nice diversion. :)

If you can, go do something with some friends or family. Not just talk to them on the phone, but get out of the house and go. You’ll feel better the more you do this. That doesn’t mean don’t talk about him, but try to do other things instead.

How about going out and try meeting someone else. Take your friends and go out. Or visit friends and spend time at their houses.

If your thoughts are really strong…write them on a piece of paper and then burn it.

Suffer like the rest of us and sigh a lot.

Thanks guys for all the help…

It is very hard to come to the reality thinking he might not call me again…

@Londongirl Or maybe a family member or a mentor? I also talk to my aunt a lot about this stuff. And fluthering is great, too.

Sometimes writing it down helps, too. You can write out all your feelings, diary-style, because sometimes if feels good just to get it out of your system. Or you can write fiction based on the situation and have the characters handle it differently or move past it.

Calling him right now would be like picking a scab off a wound. If you go back to it again and again, it will keep hurting. But if you leave it alone, eventually it will heal. Even really painful crushes and breakups fade over time.

Haleth: I just know I shouldn’t call him and wait if he calls, it is a test to see if he is keen to be friends afterall…

I don’t have anyone I can talk about this at the moment….

Work in the garden. I’m sorry it worked out this way.

Adiro: He hasn’t called since…

Hibernate: My good friend she’s back home with family and even if she’s in here, I wouldn’t bother too much of her as she’s single and she didn’t like to talk about relationships much…

@Londongirl I got nothin great to say. It takes two to make it work and he’s not in the right place. It sucks and it hurts.

Well, if he’s keen he will call iknow.

Get busy with something.

When I’m having a hard time concentrating I like using Stumbleupon or listening to really loud music.

Read a book.
Go to the movies with friends.
Watch TV.
Use the internet.
Take a walk.
Go shopping.
Go out with friends.
Go visit friends.
Clean up your house/room.
Reorganize your house/room.
Cook something
Start a project you have delayed.
Do a craft.
Go to the bookstore and hang out.
Call a friend.
Write a letter.

Thank you you all…

I find chatting with someone is the only way to help…. to bad I don’t really have close friends in real life… hence i’m in this board…

@Londongirl – How many of the other things have you tried besides going for a walk? I’m asking because I know that when I’m depressed and fixated on something, I don’t make enough effort to get past it until I get really really honest about my lack of effort.

Maybe this is time to involve yourself in an activity that will lead to making friends?

Just (try to) forget about him and get on with your life. Do what you’d be doing had you never met him. It does sound like he’s gone, and that is hard to say honestly. I think you may be lonely (as are others here on fluther) and you are putting all this hope onto him because that would solve all your problems. I’v been there hun. He never came back. But I do have a fabulous life now:)

Another idea – if you have a job, see if you can work more. That way you can make some extra money and keep busy at the same time.

If ringing him one more time would get rid of all doubt in your mind, maybe it would be worth it. As long as you haven’t rang him a bunch of times already.

I started volunteering, and I’ve been a volunteer ever since.

Find some cause you’re keen on helping with and volunteer for an organization that works in that cause. It’s one of the best ways I discovered for “getting out of yourself”.

Lemming: I did text him last night late and so far I have not heard from him… the thing is he told me he wanted to be friends and said a few times he wanted to carry on and see… I don’t understand why guys change their mind so quickly…

I was chatting to people on chatroom, just my way to get through but still one of my friend told me I should text him which I did last night late though…

Ok, if he felt in any way towards you the same way you feel about him, he will txt back. It’s not looking good. If he changes his mind, he’ll contact you, defo, in the meantime it’s best forgotton.

Now you realize that if you continue to try to communicate with him, you’ll look desperate, so let it go and it may feel empty at first, but you’ll get over it.

I only sent a text late last night but he has not texted back… so its not good.. I just don’t understand when to trust guys…

I think it is not about meeting someone he can solve my problems. It is more about it is not easy to find someone you really like, and when both people declare liking each other, then why the guy will change his mind so quickly? I mean what trigger guys that they change their mind in just one day???

@Londongirl it could be anything, but it is far from unususal. One, you could have done something wrong, or have some imperfection that he doesn’t like. No suprise there, you are not perfect. Or, you could have been absolutely perfect and it scared him away because he’s not ready for a heavy relationship. It happens. I’ve often went off a guy suddenly for no big reason. That’s why we date instead of getting married at first stomach fluther. But don’t get me wrong, I know I’m no expert.

Lemming: Well, for me it is simple, you both like each other then you date and find out more, then if you want to get serious then you will but it takes take to date for while. I think a lot of the time now guys have a list or they are looking for easy options as good match, more practical in a relationship than relying on feelings..

@Londongirl, since I’m a little older, I’ll give you some advice. Continue to be yourself, even develop yourself even more (might as well, eh?), keep smiling, be confident, and patient, always be true to yourself and remain good and kind. Then a great man will come and fall in love with you for who you are, if he wants to or not.

Feel free to message me with how you are getting on.

Lemming: thanks and I really thought this guy would be different and the feelings were mutual and then it is all quite sudden… I think I’m too shy and don’t express well…

Video games are notorious time-wasters.