What was your most embarrassing moment ever?

The time when I said Conan that 5 years from then I would give him the Tonight Show but I only let him host it for just 7 months.

5th grade (1961), standing in front of the class reading a report, and I peed. A lot. I was so shy that I could not have asked permission to go to the restroom ahead of my reading, and the nerves couldn’t allow me to hold my bladder. I remember that I was wearing a pleated skirt and knee socks (again, 1961), and the socks absorbed a good deal of the dribble. I was mortiphied before I knew what mortified meant. I don’t even know what others’ reactions were, I never looked up from the floor.

Last year, I was performing Madame Butterfly at my opera house. When transitioning to a new song, I started to sing a song from an entirely different production. Everyone noticed too.

Well, I haven’t had lots of embarassing moments thank goodness, so my most embarassing would be when I went to a local fair with some relatives. We all bought candy floss, as you do, and it was in plastic packets. I decided to ‘pop’ the packet open instead of just opening it, and all the candy floss went all over me, my face, my hair and everything. Quite a few people were looking and some laughed as well. To be honest, I was smiling myself. This was when I was about 12.
Another time would probably be when I went to play football in a park with some mates, about 4 months ago. We were playing and I somehow ended up doing a full time split in front of some boys our own age. They all hooted and started laughing. I buried my face in the grass XD

Do to a desire for comfort on a blistering hot day, I drove to shade before dealing with the smell of smoke. As a result, I set a fire that burnt down 40 acres of hay. It was the first day they’d ever allowed me to drive a tractor. Unfortunately, the tractor I drove was the one they used to push the cow manure around, and the tail pipe was covered with the stuff. You do know that in some parts of the world they use cow patties as fuel to cook their dinners, don’t you?

When the boss came to watch the fire, I was utterly embarrassed. I fully expected a huge chewing out. I fully expected to be fired.

He never said a word to me about it. Not even the next week when I did something even more embarrassing (but only because of what had already happened). Now that I think of it, I wonder if they did this stuff to me on purpose. They gave me a different tractor this time. It had had a scoop in front, but they’d taken it off and covered the place where the hydraulic hoses connect with some kind of tape.

There were a bunch of us doing stuff to the hay in the field and the boss drove in and gestured for us to all drive up to him. He started talking to us, but I couldn’t hear him. So I stood up, and leaned closer, and I pushed one of the hydraulic levers accidentally. The valve opened and the the hydraulic fluid shot through the tape, spurting all over my white undershirt like a giant ejaculation.

I will never, ever forget the look on my boss’ face when this happened. I suspect he was praying for calmness with every ounce of tissue in his body. Must have worked. he never said anything about that, either.

I, of course, felt like a complete and utter fool.

So far… peeing the bed when I was 9… my mom has a photo of me cleaning the mess… X(

^ Hahahaha!!! XD

I’m going to now sit in the corner and pretend the world doesn’t exist…

@MilkyWay You bully!

…and then put a goat in your shoe closet @MilkyWay

@King_Pariah I think you’ll have to spend a loooong time looking for that shoe closet @King_Pariah ;)

@MilkyWay…harrumph… guess I’m stuck with super gluing your dome to your pillow…

@King_Pariah I’d like to see you try! :P

@MilkyWay… You are so lucky you don’t live in the US… >:(

@King_Pariah Hahahaha.! You can’t get me :P
Btw, where exactly is that picture? On the kitchen fridge? Why don’t you just put it in the bin?

I was always bad at math despite trying and trying and trying and always failing. I just don’t have the math gene. I had this insensitive teacher in 7th grade. Mrs. Ducharme. It was pretty obvious that I was terrible at math, and was likely to fail. I was also extremely shy. One day Mrs. Ducharme asked me the answer to a math question and I said I didn’t know and she kept asking me to explain. She said something like, “Aww come on Kardamom, you know how to do this!” By that time, the tears were already welling up in my eyes and then she demanded that I get up in front of the class and diagram the answer on the chalk board in front of everyone. I got up and just stood there with my back to the students, with the chalk in my hand and I wept quietly. She kept telling me to “Come on, give it a try, you know how to do this!” The problem was, that I absolutely didn’t know how to do it, despite many, many hours of studying and trying to figure it out. I simply can’t do math. And at that time, I was painfully shy so that made this whole situation about 100 times worse than it should have been. She made me stand up there for about 5 minutes, but it seemed like an eternity.

I was 12 then and I’m in my mid 40’s now, but I can still vividly recall that day and it still makes me sick to my stomach to think about it. She knew perfectly well that I was struggling, and that I was shy and quiet (never a trouble maker or a brat), but she thought it would be cute and fun to get me up there in front of everyone and maybe “knock some sense into me” or something like that. I guess she thought that a good motivation technique was to put you on the spot.

I never got any better at math. I struggled with mandatory math classes even up through my first year of college (when I finally completed the math requirements). But I regularly got C’s and D’s in math and even failed one class, despite my best, agonizing efforts.

Sometimes when I’m especially stressed, I will have nightmares about that day and how that teacher just sat there, kind of laughing under her breath while I was made to humiliate myself in front of the class.

@picante You’re not the only one with that experience and I’m glad I’m not the only one now! :D Mine was during theater boot camp during the final show when I was 24 years old, so I don’t have the excuse of being a kid.

I was up in front of maybe 200 people and wearing leggings and a t shirt—we were doing a comedy routine and for one part I had to be frozen in place. I wanted so bad to do a great job because there were famous actors in the audience and scouts for professional theater groups, so if I was supposed to stay frozen, I would stay frozen to the utmost of my ability. Two of the other actors went off script unexpectedly and did something profoundly hysterical but… I was frozen and didn’t react, didn’t laugh, didn’t move… I didn’t, but my bladder for some reason didn’t stay frozen. I think when I suppressed my laughter so strongly, it had to be released somehow.

My solution to the tiny puddle on the floor, I took advantage of the fact they were off script and made up a reason to sit down quickly on it to hide it. I don’t think anyone saw it…... hiding head

It was a hazing I was subjected to when I was a Boy Scout.
I don’t speak with anyone who was there anymore. Not because of that, but because of my choice of friends.
Also, not because they are all mysteriously dying off.

I don’t bowl much, so when I visited my cousin in Fremont, California one year, he took me bowling with a group of his friends. He and his friends were very good bowlers, so can you imagine my embarrassment when I accidentally dropped the heavy ball behind me, as I prepared to launch it down the bowling lane? Gosh, the sound it made as it hit the floor behind me——BANG! Everyone at the bowling lanes turned to look at me. “Who’s this klutz?!” Then I dropped it AGAIN——BANG! That was sooooo embarrassing. :(

So my parents are deaf, and at their wedding, they had a deaf preist to sign all the religious stuff. In order for a deaf preist to sign he must have both hands available. Therefore; he needs a bible-holder. Me being the son, I got to hold the bible.

Well there were pages folded in half and inserted in the bible to act as bookmarks, and one fell out (Side note: where I was standing was about three steps up from where my parents were kneeling), and landed on the bottom step. I was asked to retrieve the paper, so I knelt down and attempted to get this paper. No one told me that in a tux, you lose range of motion and can’t reach your arms out as far as you normally could. I was reaching and reaching to get this paper, and I just couldn’t reach it. Finally my had reached the paper, but there was a problem, in finally getting the paper, I had leaned too far forward and was now unable to stop myself from toppling over! There I went, tumbling down three stairs in front of all the wedding guests. I wasn’t embarrassed though, not me! Just kidding. I almost died from embarrassement.

When we first moved here, I was 9. My parents met this family and became friends with them. They had three sons. The one closest in age to me was 13. We kinda drifted apart and when I was 17 we went to a wedding and they were also invited. My mom starts talking to them and telling them how she always had their youngest son picked out for me and how perfect it would be and basically selling me to this family and they start planning a wedding. Meanwhile. I’m sitting on the other side of my mom absolutely fuming and bright red from embarrassment. I just sunk in my seat and leaned my head to the side and pretended to be dead.