Have you ever felt truly alone?

Yes, when I was in the middle of my depression.

It always seems like that when you are depressed. it is part of the symptoms of depression.

Are you on medication? Can you get on medication?

You do not have to feel this way.

Your friends may still care about you, but they just don’t know how to act around you, maybe you have been acting funny or making strange comments…as you probably do since you aren’t happy. Take your closest one aside and tell them how you are feeling. Maybe they could explain to the rest of the group. They won’t mind as long as you are getting help . No one wants to be freinds with someone who wants to kill themselves…that is just going to totally bumb them out:)

You need to get help. It’s not that bad.

Was on medication, I hated it, it didn’t help at all. Already got “help” (as in I was insti-fucking-tutionalized for 10 weeks 15 hours and 31 minutes).

And I always act bright a cheery around them like I used to though a bit more subdued so they think I’m doing better and all

@King_Pariah I think you need to go back to your doctor. Life is alot easier when you are on the same playing field as everybody else, you know, are you a bit highly strung about things?

Yeah, there was a period in my life when I felt very isolated. I read a bit of Jean Paul Sartre and ‘The Outsider’ by Colin Wilson. I was never on medication and I never saw a doctor and things got better.

I suspect that though it feels that the meeting with your friends was a disaster it won’t have seemed that way to them. Maybe the next time you meet up you will feel like spilling out how you feel and it will come as a relief.

@lemming I can’t bring myself to meet up with the docs again. And no, if anything, I’m considered too lax about things.

My dad killed himself at age 63 after battling depression for decades. I can tell you loosely what his mistakes were: he thought he knew everything, he thought he could outsmart every pill and therapist, and he was never humble enough to admit he was wrong. So he became very extreme and manic, very intense to be around, until he eventually planned out for months and carried out his own death.

My advice to you is to not give up on counseling, drugs, and therapists. Maybe you feel you’ve had enough of that, but continuing to try is your only hope. You’ve got to figure out some way to find some sort of peace with who you are, admitting as much as you can to yourself about who and what you are. If you are weak, admit you are weak and get help. If you’re angry, figure out why. You’ve got to be so brutally honest with yourself about everything.

But I also know this is a disease that kills like cancer. It’s curable, or at least you can bury the symptoms deeply enough to not constantly notice. I genuinely wish you the best. I know my words are likely nothing new to you. I so wish I knew the right words.

I feel lonely all the time. For me what helped was finding a new group of friends who didn’t know about my past or all the things I’ve done. Having people who didn’t know me helped me become someone who was worth knowing. I wasn’t confined by their expectations of me anymore. Maybe you could join a group from a site like Meetup.com, etc.

The afternoon after my first son was born I went home to an empty house and the aloneness I felt was raw and staggering still thinking of my wife and newborn still back at the hospital. Last quiet day I have had in 15 years! ;)

@athenasgriffin sounds like a good idea but so far skimming through, all of them are either for mothers, single parents, or christians. I fall under none of these categories and being a paternal figure for my little bro doesn’t count.

When I’m feeling a bit blue I always talk to someone because that really helps me. Usually I always have someone to talk to like my best friend or my dad or sometimes even my sisters, depending on what the problem is. But last week when my GCSE result was about to come out I found my self all alone. I don’t know why but I couldn’t talk to anyone about it. Whenever I thought about it I felt like vomiting and my throat felt really heavy.

I was miserable

But It turned out excellent!!

p.s I even thought about posting a question on fluther about this!.

@King_Pariah if you didn’t like the doctors you already talked to, maybe you could shop around and find one you do really like.

I ended up in the streets for a couple of days once. I’ve never felt so alone in my puff as I did that time. Nobody talks to you, you just sit there or walk around, and people walk right past you. Friends and family weren’t around, there wasn’t someone to go to.
It’s really depressing when you feel like you’re living on the edge of society. I suppose being homeless on a long term makes one used to it and the feeling eventually changes, but for me that was completely horrendous.

I’m always saying all this bullshit about not wanting to be around people and shit, well there’s one time that this really happened, and it sucked.

Try a different med and give it a chance? For me it took three different meds and many many months for the good one to actually work.

I’m actually feeling really alone this summer. Not as badly as you, but you asked and I feel like sharing. This is my second summer living where I’m living, but no one seems to want to be my friend here. My co-workers have all worked together for years, and they haven’t lifted a finger to make me feel included. There were three of us at work last night. The other two discussed their plans to go out after in front of me, and not only didn’t invite me but left together without even saying bye. This was one of so many similar examples this summer. My best friends are far away but my computer is dead so I can’t skype them. My best friend’s birthday is this week, but she’s in Mexico. I just had the idea to fly down to surprise her, but it’s too last minute to get a cheap ticket. I wish I had thought of it earlier, because I need time with her badly. My roommate is amazing but she’s sixty-three and works all the time. Things are such that I can’t move to be with my best friends now, so what’s on my horizon after another two months of loneliness is moving to another unknown place where I may or may not make friends. I really miss college and the ease with which it provided social interactions.

Please don’t kill yourself. I guarantee there’s something out there for both you and me to feel happy.

A couple times.
No fun.

@sliceswiththings The boorish behavior of your co-workers was inexcusable. If we were in the same area, I would love to lift a glass with you.

Yeah. The couple of times I dropped to my knees and opened my heart, pleading with all my being that Jesus Christ would come in to my heart and take away all of my problems.

Didn’t happen. Felt kinda jilted after that.

Thanks, @marinelife !

Yes, this feeling comes and goes in waves for me.