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Hawaii_Jake's avatar

Without fear of any backlash of any kind, what would you like to say to your parents?

Asked by Hawaii_Jake (37734points) August 26th, 2011

Most parents do the best they think they can. Many think they actually do a good job. A few actually do.

But what about the kids? Do they think their parents did the best they could?

If you had the opportunity to tell your parents anything, what would you say?

I’d tell mine that they did me a great disservice by threatening to kick me out of the house if I came out of the closet as gay.

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15 Answers

jrpowell's avatar

My dad is dead and my mom has already heard everything I have to say about her lackluster parenting.

I’m content.

Judi's avatar

I wish I could tell them one more time that I love them, and if they ever fell short I forgive them.

Bellatrix's avatar

G’day… good to see you both… did you see me do [fill in many blanks]. They are both dead. Would love to meet up with them both for a cuppa, a hug and just to say all the things I didn’t think to say. Sorry if this isn’t what you were wanting @hawaii_jake.

Adirondackwannabe's avatar

I’m one of those fuckups that got blessed with great parents and even a good stepfather. I just tell them NICE!

Bart19's avatar

I would love to tell them that they should stop being so terribly selfish. Two weeks before my wedding and now they’re cause havoc about the most silly reasons, turning me into a nervous wreck, upsetting my fiancee beyond believe and placing my poor grandparents in the middle of it all.

Kudos to them.

john65pennington's avatar

Both of my parents are deceased. For many years, in birthday, fathers day, and mothers day cards, I have told my parents how I feel for them and the way they raised me as a child.

I was fortunate. I could not have had a better life as a child.

I had Super Parents and I made sure they both knew it.

They are missed.

syz's avatar

“Why have you never even mentioned my natural father to me? What happened? Why did you divorce and why have I never met him, even though he lives in the same state?”

bluejay's avatar

To my dad- I would say I love you and I miss you. Me and my brother really need you so pull your head out of your but and come visit us! Don’t worry about mom and what she says. You can at least come visit us for a weekend. It’s better than nothing!

To my mom- I don’t know why I still love you after all the emotional pain you’ve put me threw. You’ve pushed my father away and laugh when I get hurt. You’ve never showed me any motherly love so as soon as I can I’m leaving and never turning back!

Keep_on_running's avatar

To dad: “I wish you weren’t so damn strict and emotionally blunted when I was growing up”.

Judi's avatar

@syz ; That breaks my heart. My son is in the middle of a divorce and I am worried that the same thing will happen to my grandson. She is trying to make sure he never sees his son again :-(

_zen_'s avatar

Best question in ages!

I would say to them that to err is human – but if they had just said I’m sorry – it would have saved a lot of pain and heartache.

I have learned that one can become a better parent than their parents simply by doing, or not doing, what has been observed. I’ll leave it at that.

ZEPHYRA's avatar

I agree with @Adirondackwannabe ( as regards myself, of course), a major fuckup if ever there was one also blessed with wonderful parents!

Carly's avatar

I would tell them that their decision to get divorced was a bad idea. They left each other because they couldn’t find a way to agree on things or even be flexible, and leaving a marriage without even trying to fix it has really made me have less respect for both of them.

wundayatta's avatar

I don’t have anything to say to them. Nothing I can say would make any difference. It wouldn’t change them or change the past or help me.

If anything mattered, I would tell them that I wish they had done more to try to make me feel loved and secure.

Berserker's avatar

Mom; nothing. You can’t win with her, besides not saying anything. The best thing to do is to ignore all the guilt trips and accusations, and that’s what I pretty much always did, at least starting from my early teens.

Dad; also nothing. But because there isn’t anything bad I’d want to say to him.

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