Are my toes just plain stupid?

Clearly you would not do well as a duck. lol

Interesting problem you have there officer, maybe your toes are damaged from wearing trooper boots for 40 years. haha

Your toes should just fall into a natural flip flop action, clenching and releasing accordingly.

Maybe a trip to a podiatrist is in order, surgery might help. lol

Coloma, thanks for the advice. I think I will just give up on the flip flops and play Huckleberry Finn for the rest of my life. Barefoot in the grass!

I suspect it is because you walk with the LEO sense of purpose, for which flip flops are not designed.

You need to work on your slacker shuffle. Once you have that down I’m sure your flip flops will saunter right along with you.

@john65pennington I think whoever invented flip-flops was a masochist and I hate em with a passion. I prefer my mandals! ;)

Flip flops & me…....missiles, or should that be toe-pedoes? Dey wont stay on me bleedin feet!

Nail gun.

Wearing flip-flops requires me to keep my feet flexed at all times, otherwise they would fall off. I don’t know if that is true for everyone, or only those of us with high arched feet – but it’s like a mini workout for your toes.

@YoBob Hells yeah! That’s why we Californians rarely wear anything else.

@Cruiser

Do you wear Mantyhose with your Mandels too? lol

If you’re a strider then flip flops are going to do that. There’s a change in gait, a kind of shuffle necessary for flip flops.

@john65pennington Brother, you are not alone. I can’t wear them either. They are dangerous twixt my tootsies. I decided to use them for other things since the rubber is such a great cushion. You can insert a piece in the butt stock of your Ithaca 12 ga. Put pieces on the 4 corners of your tool box so you don’t scratch the floor. Put a couple of pieces under the box fan so the vibration does not travel through the floor boards. Tie a pair to the car bumper when pushing a certain family member’s worthless car.
They get used and I don’t break my neck.

Walking in flip flops is such a strain for me that I don’t wear them. They just keep falling off my feet.

@worriedguy: Excellent! I’m glad I’m not alone in using my flip flops for other purposes. They make good knee pads for our tile floors when I’m looking under furniture for lost dog toys, I used them to squish bugs (easy to rinse & no leather damage) and I’m designing a “frankenvest” with some cut up ones as padding for my shoulder and chest so our 12 guage and fixed stock AK don’t rip me up.

Okay, Coloma reveals more of her quirkiness.
My gooose ‘Marwyn’ knows to wait for me to put on my ‘flappies’, ( flip flops ) when he is screaming for bread on the landing in my garage. lolol

Yep, I tell him ” wait til I get my flappies on!” haha

@Coloma Big nope there! Just black knee-high socks!

Wait! I gotta stop laughing just from reading the question! ... Wait.. wait…
OK! Maybe, yeah, you need to learn to kind of grip the part that goes between your big toe and the other toe. Just kind of push your toes together! It’s not uncomfortable or trouble at all—at least, it never has been for me—but yeah. If you don’t hold them on some how they’ll just…fall off!

@Neizvestnaya Exactly! If you can’t wear flop flops you should use them for something else. I like the knee pad idea. If you add them to the back of the stock you just need to find screws an equal length longer. No problem finding those at the local hardware store.

They make decent window scrapers…

I’ve never had any problems wearing flip flops and I never took the “Flip Flop 101” course.

Do you have hammer toes? Wearing cramped shoes where the toes are bent for long periods of time can cause the muscles and tendons in them to shorten, resulting in the hammer toe deformity. Perhaps something in your past fell on your toes and messed up the structural nature of your toes including muscles, tendons, bones and nerves.

A sports medicine doctor may help. He/she may recommend special physical therapy to help with your dream of one day successfully wearing flip flops. You will likely be given special exercises for your feet and toes especially for flip flop wearing. If that is not helpful then you may consider surgery.

I have the same problem, but with heels. You’ll never catch me in heels. They are too much work and are uncomfortable.

Wear what’s most comfortable for you. I would give the flip flops to Goodwill and wear sandals.

That is so funny:) But I guess that is why they have been making the kind of flip flops that are shaped like bucket seats, perfect for that problem. Not just for toes but for heels that tend to land left-ward or right-ward.