What are your parenting goals?

I have been there and done that. I never thought of having goals, but if I had they would all have been met.

To give them a better childhood than I had (not a hard goal to meet). To raise them to be happy, healthy, well-rounded (smart and social), good-hearted, responsible human beings. I want them to be critical thinkers, compassionate and kind, and successful in the ways that matter to them.

So far, so good. Obviously, there have been many bumps along the way, but at ages 13, almost 15, and 17, my daughters are kick ass human beings.

Mostly what @flutherother said. The basic goal was to raise someone who would be a valuable (in terms of actions, compassion, etc) contributing member of society, someone who could be happy without hurting others to achieve that.

I wanted them to have the tools to leave the world a better place than they found it.

Pleased to say that I have successfully launched my offspring who will be turning 24 in November.

She is a great girl, has an adoring boyfriend she lives with, is smart, funny, caring and tenacious, a chip off the ol’ mother ship.

Mission complete! ;-D

I want them to be men of honor. I want to bring something back to the word honor by getting them there.

I want to teach them:
Treat women with respect.
Think before you speak.
Don’t cry when you fall down. Be tough.
Their word means something.
You get what you earn. Work hard.

And all the other difficult lessons I’ve learned throughout my life.

So far, I’ve done ok. I wouldn’t say great , but ok. Each day is a new commitment.

I believe our first goal was to get them to be caring and inquisitive, caring about their fellow travelers on this planet and inquisitive about what makes this planet work.

We also wanted them to be competent critical thinkers, going along with the inquisitiveness, and to question authority in a healthy way.

We wanted them to see the genuine equality in all people.

Healthy self-respect was a chief concern, enabling a healthy respect for others.

We genuinely tried to be gender-neutral in our child rearing, but our oldest, a boy, seemed to naturally gravitate to Batman and such things even though there were no toy guns, etc., in the house. Our middle child, a girl, picked up a broom as her first toy. The youngest, also a girl, was influenced by her older sister.

I could go on and on, but I think I’ll leave it with the following:

Our oldest is leaving the nest soon to start on his life. The girls are still in school and excelling in different areas. It’s all very gratifying.

Happy, Healthy, Accomplished children, that will take of care of me when I’m older and not able to care for myself.

Happy and self-sufficient, able to form loving relationships and be a good parent. Check, check and check! How the hell did that happen?

@Hawaii_Jake

Awesome! :-)

I agree with teaching kindness and curiosity and healthy self respect.
My daughter and I just got off the phone, ran the gauntlet from everything from relationship stuff, preying mantises, a new chinese restaurant in town and their new cat. haha
It is so gratifying to relate to your kids as adults.

I love being on equal turf these days and I have much to learn from her perspective as well. :-)

I want them to grow up to be extraordinary. I want them to alleviate the suffering of others, in one way or another. I want them to transform the world. So far, they’ve done so in transforming mine and that’s good enough.

I say this about my former stepdaughter.

I wanted her to grow up to be a confident Americanized girl and to not think independence was out of reach for her- she did it. She passed her teen years with no pregnancies, no marrying any of the dozens of men her family pushed on her. She is happy to make her own choices and she believes in herself to where she doesn’t feel she’s missed out on anything.

I wanted her to take herself seriously but not for granted in her school abilities, goals and ideas for career. I wanted her to research, plan and volunteer so it would feel very real and obtainable- she did it, she’s going to be a doctor very soon now.

I wanted her to see her own physical beauty was malleable if she wanted, that she could style herself to an extent, invent herself in a way that felt comfortable with her personality- she’s dynamic, she’s gorgeous and positively attracting.

These are things I’m hoping I can be part of in a small way for my new soon-to-be stepdaughter and her brothers. They have plenty of friends and smiley relatives but I want to be a person in their lives they can come to with tough stuff, even if they know it’s something not my cup of tea.

My wife and I want them to grow up mannerful and respectful, compassionate and caring, and have a good self-esteem. When I see my little girls give up their seats on a bus for an elderly lady, or they run up to me and greet me with a hug and a kiss and tell me that they did something well, I seem to know we are accomplishing our goals.

Our goal was simple: to raise a happy child. We didn’t set out to define them, establish criteria for their success, influence their occupations, judge their choice of partners, or anything else. We wanted them to learn how to take care of themselves in a healthy way so they could enjoy their lives. To me that pretty much covered everything.

I want (wanted) my children to feel loved, excel in school and be happy.

I’ve accomplished this with 2 children and am doing so on the 3rd.

I want my children to be genuine, caring and happy. They are now (at 11, 14 and 16) and I can’t see any of them going off the rails.

I like Chris Rock’s goal of “keeping my daughter off the pole”.

@augustlan Did you just refer to me as almost 15? Is this like the time I was almost in the fourth grade?

@mangeons , she said you were a kick ass human being. Pretty high marks. :-)

My goal is to tame the beast without breaking the child. I want them to have the skills to navigate through life with other people, to always try their best to be true to themselves, to be able to make the best of their individual strengths, and to learn ways to manage their challenges.

And, I want them all to still like me enough to not stick me in an old folks’ home and forget about me. :)

Holy crap. I meant almost 16. Hangs head in shame.

Lol @augustlan I do the same thing.

Oh, my goodness, @mangeons, you’re almost sixteen? I can hardly believe it. Why, I remember back when you were only…almost fourteen. Seems like only yesterday. How time flies!