How do I explain this problem to Colleagues?
Asked by
Aspire (
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September 13th, 2011
As well as others things, I have social anxiety, pretty bad actually. How do I explain this to work colleagues? So far I have managed to make excuses for staff parties.
There is another one coming up in a week or two, I’m just wondering when they’ll realise I’m never going to go to any.
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10 Answers
What about treating the anxiety instead?
I’ve been treating it for years. I only get worse.
I don’t want to derail this thread but it might be worth asking another question about that—I think there are other people here who have dealt with similar issues who might be able to help, at least a little.
As far as managing work parties, if you say no enough times people stop inviting you to things. Just politely decline.
You could try being honest with them and explain how you feel. Just expect some people will not understand.
@Adirondackwannabe I just don’t really want them to know my problems, but are generally ignorant to what they don’t understand, but at the same I don’t want to cause work problems.
@Aspire That’s a tough situation. I thought you might try to educate them, but that’s probably not going to work. Before I came on this site, I didn’t really understand anxiety or depression until I had some great discussions with other jellies. The brain is just like any other organ, it can have issues, society does a lousy job of understanding that.
I would not tell work colleagues about your social anxiety disorder. it might get back to your boss. Then actions or inaction on your part at work could be wrongly attributed to your social anxiety disorder. You want to be judged on your work performance alone.
Just keep making excuses or don’t make an excuse just say “I’m sorry, but I can’t make it.”
@Aspire Do you mind explaining how you’ve been treated for the anxiety?
Why not just be honest, yet not so open that you tell about the anxiety. Ex: I prefer to do work quietly while everyone else is away celebrating. Or I am calmer when I meet with people one on one. Group meetings make me anxious.
People tend to empathize with others when they get to know them. Since you are socially anxious, most likely people think you are either shy or reserved or both.
@SpatzieLover I take 150mg of sertraline. I have had therapy, but not kept it going.
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