My husband and his mom?

Counseling. It works.

It sounds like you are in an abusive relationship. Do you find your husband is critical of you a lot and does not listen to your point of view? Your opinions and feelings are just as valid as his. I urge you to talk to a counselor/therapist about this separately from him to sort out your feelings first. When a couple that has been fighting a lot goes into counseling together it is usually more beneficial to be seen separately first so they can both tell their side of things without interrupting/arguing with their SO. Do you feel like your relationship is healthy?

has this kind of conversation ever happened in the past? Or is this the first time?

Looks like maybe your mother-in-law is upset that you took her son away from her family. Apparently he still has a young sibling, so maybe the two of them feel that he was deprived of a relationship with her because they did not grow up together. I do not think it abnormal or heartless that he wanted to go out with just his sister, as my sister and I do it all the time. Some times adults need to do things without kids; however, having said this, if he’s an inattentive father, that is grounds to be upset, because he is putting his family above that of his immediate family. As for the smacking of your kid, no one likes to believe that their kids are capable of being violent and obnoxious like that, so let it go, as kids being kids. But I do think you guys need to sit down and discuss the future of your marriage, since it sounds like there is more upsetting him about your relationship than you know. Hate to say it, but if you let it go or fester too long, he might seek the wrong kind of attention elsewhere, rather than in a counseling session like the two of you need.

If you WANT to salvage this relationship then definately go to counseling. He sounds abusive to me. I have been married to my husband for almost 8 years and we have one beautiful daughter. If he EVER said any ONE of those things to me I would tell him it’s counseling or the door. He has some serious issues. Keep us updated.

I agree with Breanne. “it sounds like there is more upsetting him about your relationship than you know. Hate to say it, but if you let it go or fester too long, he might seek the wrong kind of attention elsewhere, rather than in a counseling session like the two of you need.”
Also, both of you should be careful with the words you use, as these can needlessly destroy a relationship
“I guess I don’t meet his standards maybe he should have kids with his mom…LOL”
I understand you’re very upset, but I hope you didn’t say this to him. At the same time, he really shouldn’t have said the things he did either, they were not respectful at all, but a wrong doesn’t justify any similar action in return. These sorts of comments do not progress the situation.
I had a girlfriend who hated my mom and she made some very harsh comments about her that really hurt me, even though I don’t talk to my mom much, and just drove me away from my gf even more. And I hear guys have a strange connection to their mothers, some psychological thing. Same goes for girls and their daddies.
I think both of you need to be more understanding of each other (no offense intended at all, just trying to help). How often does he see his sister? But yeah, counseling.

personally, I dont think that anyone should get in between a parent and their child, I would never want someone doing that to me.
She doesn’t want to believe that her daughter would hit your son anymore than you want to believe your son could ever hit her daughter. You might be more alike than you think and thats maybe why you dont get along.

What’s your question? You clearly already recognize that what he said was completely out of line, but we are of course only seeing your side of the story. Sounds like the two of you need to hash out it with a pro.

couples therapy time!