How can I unclog myself? (yes, constipation)

Prune juice.

If you want natural foods, I would suggest anything high in fiber or what I call ruffage (such as lettuce).

Coffee, sopgel husk, olive oil in milk. Anything oily to lubricate your insides and something fibrous to get things moving.

Greasy Fast foods.
Seriously MiraLax and Colace, or at last effort, go the the local drug store and get a couple of these Mineral based products.

A stool softener. If that does not work, a laxative.

My sister had a real problem with this a while back. Finally she had to go to the emergency room the pain from constipation was so bad.
They gave her a recipe for what they call a “Brown Bomb”.

1 cup of warm Vernor’s, not sugar free, warm it up a bit in the microwave.
1 cup of prune juice, (you can warm this up with the Vernor’s if you want to.)
1–2 ounces of Milk of magnesia.
Don’t drink this all at once, but have about half of it then the rest a few hours later to keep things moving.
It takes about an hour before you will get results, but stick close to a bathroom for about 6–8 hours.
You will have more than one trip to the bathroom.
You might also want to get some glycerin suppositories to help things be more comfortable at first.

After the initial “clog” is gone, then following the advice of fiber and water and other non-constipating foods is recommended.

Thanks for the advice so far. When I get a chance I’ll run to the store. In the meantime, I’ve heard that stimulating the ab muscles/lower stomach can help move things along? Anyone heard of this?

@l2ec Any amount of exercise will usually get things moving too. A light run, walk, aerobic activity would also be a worthy attempt.

Correction on my post above.
My sister says that you drink the whole thing down at once. It’s gross but effective and worth it.

2–3 days with stomach pain. That’s a long time.

I would take a stool softner tablet or possibly consider a suppository. Enema if you’re brave.
they are not as bad as they sound, I promise

I sometimes get blocked up and these methods work for me. High-fiber foods are good (you should eat them all the time) but in terms of short-term relief, no. If you want FAST relief, use a laxative of some sort to get yourself back on track. Keep eating high fiber foods and drinking water to stop this from happening again.

You probably need more fiber in your diet. I would add in something like Metamucil everyday until you regulate again.

One of fluther’s all time best questions started out this way and ended up that a doctor on fluther sent him to the hospital for an emergency appendectomy. Saved his life.
If you push your stomach does it hurt when you release it?

Cherries and cherry juice!

Eat a big bowl of fresh cherries..everything will take care of itself overnight!

Lots of fiber and lots of water. The fiber will expand in your colon and you will have a movement.

2–3 days is quite a long time. I’d be seriously considering a dr appointment. As @Judi said, ya never know, it could be something quite serious.

There are craploads (heh) of laxatives over the counter that you can use. They all work to varying degrees.

Two to three days is long and reason to visit a doctor?
I have been close to or around a week without number two in the past, and I know of people who didn’t for close to two weeks.
It sucks definitely also two days without going, but in the end it will come (out).
I take warm/hot showers and massage my belly (I don’t know if this works (scientifically) but it helps ‘in my head’) and I use laxatives (the ones that you don’t take orally).
After half an hour to an hour it starts to cramp very much, but then you’ll be able to go (depending of course per person, but for me it works).
After I succeed I promise myself (again) that I will start to eat fiber rich food.
Good luck!

I’m a fan of psyllium fiber supplements like Metamucil; it’s a fiber supplement and a laxative and it seems to work for me whenever I have a bout of…irregularity.

You haven’t tried the usual over counter remedies? Prune juice works fast. Bran related cereals, Flax seed fiber, lots of water, just to menmtion a few.

As the owner of vegetarian geese, let me assure you, you will never see a constipated goose. lol

@Coloma Good to know as I’m not sure I actually want to encounter a constipated goose. Some of them are cranky enough as it is.

I can offer up several suggestions. The one that has worked for me the best is OTC laxatives. I have IBS, but sometimes do get corked up. Also, I have found, a couple of cups of hot coffee get things moving real well too. Another thing that works, is what I call “retraining”, that is, just go and sit on the toilet for 20–30 minutes, and relax while you are sitting there. You might have to make several attempts with this method to get things moving again. I know that if I do not do #2 even for one day, I am in complete agony. Good luck, and hopefully things will be moving real soon.

Ironically, I will be hoping for an update on this one. I hope all is ok.

Update?

Hi, this is l2ec. (made up a quick account and it won’t let me post new comments.. yada yada)

I’ve been eating prunes and mini wheats but still no action. The stomach discomfort is mild, so I don’t think there is a serious issue behind the constipation (appendix problems, for example). Regardless, I’m going get a laxative tomorrow morning if things don’t improve. If that doesn’t do the trick, it may be time to schedule an appointment.

I would suggest some of Rush’s Thunderballs, if they didn’t contain mercury.
It was the primary cure for bowel ailments of the Lewis and Clark expedition.

It was a once a month preventative on the expedition. The expedition soon learned to make camp for a couple days when they were administered.

@rebbel Yes, I agree, two or three days is way too soon to worry so much and start running to the doctor but chronic constipation killed the king of rock and roll, killed Elvis so eventually, it is something to worry about.

Try the Brown Bomb @12ec or is it @12ed ?
Anyway, it works fast and is very effective.

yogurt- ALWAYS works for me. When I get extremely stressed this happens to me :( although it becomes a vicious cycle because then I’m more stressed. And I’ve actually tried an enema the first time and it didn’t work. BUT yogurt has the probiotics and literally cleans me out (sorry if that’s graphic)

I do hope you will let us know if everything comes out alright. ~

smooth move tea…does the job w/out cramps

Two large tablespoons of molasses.