How secure do you feel in your life? Your relationship? Your job?

I am sorry to hear you are feeling so anxious about things @Jude. Is your anxiety justified or you just feel anxious but without any clear reason for feeling that way?

I never feel 100% secure in my job or my relationship and I think to feel so secure would make me worry about being complacent. Nothing is ever certain in life has been my experience. However, I do feel very secure about my relationship and my job is going very well.

My life is pretty good, but it is surprising how it can change from one day to the next. One day I’m feeling really good and a few days later I’m wondering if it’s worth it again, and then two days later, I’m good again and I stay that way for a while. A lot of it seems to be external circumstances. Serious things can change quite rapidly. Mostly as my relationship changes. Or relationships, since I have kids and friends, as well.

My job stays pretty steady. It doesn’t demand much of me. I’m not ambitious. I’m more about enjoying life than trying to be successful. But since I’ve had some bad times, I’ve realized it’s all right just to find those good days and enjoy them. I don’t have to save the world. I am allowed to have fun sometimes. I am allowed to feel good about myself on occasion, despite the fact that I am one of the more….. [not good thing] .... individuals on the planet.

I’m pretty anxious too. Things seem stable, but there are plenty of factors gnashing their teeth at me, which could topple this stability easy enough. Ah well, it’ll just be another adventure, unless I die. But I ain’t gone think bout that. XD

If it were not for the fact that my job is falling apart, my family life is overscheduled and too stressful, I haven’t slept in days, and I just pulled out my back, I would feel great. Oh, and did I mention that I haven’t meditated in 5 days?

@Jude – Relax. It’s all temporary. You’ll feel better soon. Just work on controlling your breathing. A few slow cycles like this. Exhale completely, breathe slowly and fully (stomach breathing, not upper chest) through your nose. Hold it as nearly as long as you can, then slowly exhale through pursed lips. Make sure the exhale is very slow and very complete. Get every bit of air out of your lungs. Repeat.

I might not seem that secure but I am.

And indeed relax; despair will pass ^^

Very secure. What is within my control is rock solid. The rest, I can’t sweat.

Everything is temporary anyway.

Once I accepted I have no control over anything, I began to appreciate what I had. Anything can change, at any second, so I hold on loosely and do what I can to make myself feel that there is some semblance of continuity.

@tinyfaery I wonder how cool and collected you’d be if you lost the most important things to you..

@Jude You’re in one of the safest nations around here. You have your vicious cats to protect you. Has anything else changed?

I am very secure in the love my children and grandchildren and my wife have for me. I have to admit that having incurable cancer and type 2 diabetes is a bit anxiety producing at times, but I am also financially secure as long as the government continues to pay me, and I am very secure in the love of God, so I can weather just about anything. : )

My jobs are ever changing, always have been so I don’t really expect security there. My relationship is the planet I orbit around. My relationship and my friends are my life, we all kind of weave in and out which is a security in itself, to me anyways.

I’d be dead.

Jude, Hang in there. Send me an answer or pm me ASAP tommorrow. If you want call me.

I have 34 years in a union job that I am very good at. I have never been suspended, though I have come close a few times.
I have been married for 27 years. My wife was married and divorced before, but this was my first marriage.
I have two houses I am barely making payments on. I am currently living paycheck to paycheck, but I am not worried about that. Hopefully, that will change pretty quick.
I am happy with my life, and not afraid of death.
I have a stable, secure life.

It’ll be ok, girlie. Remember to breathe.

I’m fairly secure in my relationship, but that’s about it. Even the relationship is not 100%, but it’s as close as one can get, I think. Life in general, though? That I’m never secure about. Bad things can – and do – happen, and with alarming regularity. We just have to muddle through the best we can. When bad shit happens, we have to remember that life wasn’t always bad, and it won’t always be bad, either. We just have to hang on until it’s better again, and it always gets better. I promise.

Some days I feel more secure than others. Ever have one of those days when nothing seems to go right? Well those kinds of days make me insecure. A bad day at work, stress, dwelling too much on the future, etc., all work against me.

In my relationships I feel very secure, however. I’m lucky to have a loving, sweet wife and two adorable young children, and my relationship with my relatives and friends are for the most part, good.

@CaptainHarley More power to you my friend.

@tinyfaery me too.

I’ve just about lost my mind from all the anxiety i’m experiencing lately…. Sorry I don’t have any words of advice i’m still lost myself.

I hear ya. At my meditation class this Sunday, when I let all the noise go, I realized I had so much anxiety it was causing me physical pain.

I don’t feel secure in any of those things. My job will end in 2–3 years, and I will have to find another one, so I guess that’s simultaneously guaranteed stability and instability. My relationship—I know intellectually it’s stable, ‘cause every time I’ve tried to break up with the guy he has talked me down. But I still feel worried, often, about all the many things that can go wrong.

So I don’t know if hearing about other people’s stuff helps you. But if you wanna talk, let it all out.

Not at all stable. I suppose my home and my schooling is guaranteed for the immediate future, but all of my relationships are in a state of transition, and I am not sure which will last.

Family’s fine, animals fine. The back problems are about out of control these last couple weeks. And that makes for some security doubts with my work and taking care of things in general.

All of which makes me anxious…at times unbearably so.

@MRSHINYSHOES

Thank you! : ))

@CaptainHarley :>)

I’m cycling into some financial anxiety again after riding a pretty high wave for quite a few years.
My overall optimistic and low worry state is being challenged again now that the wave has crashed on the economic rocks. lol

This has also been another year of letting go of a few people, no regrets, I am very protective over my peace, so it’s gotten easy to let go of drama mongers. :-)

Yeah, I think I need a cull too, life would be a lot calmer without the drama queens squealing in my ears every five minutes, work that is …….. I’m in limp mode, slightly detached from everything at the moment, retreating ever more into my shell….. As share prices tumble, so too does my optimism :-/ the only thing rising around here is my blood pressure 145/105 can’t be good.
Still, if I have a good chat with the cat things will calm down a bit…...

Right now I feel I have no security. I, too, am very frightened about the future.

Relationship – I don’t have one this second but if I did and it didn’t work out I am pretty good at moving on.

Job – No real worries there. I do freelance work. I live cheap. I have enough cash taped to the bottom of my desk to last me a year.

I have a wife that loves me to death, a job and business that the worst economy in history didn’t cause a dent in….all I have going against me is time and fate….I am as anxious as you @Jude!

I hope you feel more confident soon, @Jude.

I feel pretty anxious these days too. Everything is uncertain. My health is uncertain. My ability to do college successfully is uncertain, and therefore my future career opportunities are uncertain. I’m not in a relationship. I’m hoping for the best.

I managed to sort one of the things that was causing me anxiety today so I feel a little more secure than I did when I answered this question earlier.

@Leanne1986

Yayyyy! You GO, girl! [ high fives ] : ))

Only thing I’m worried about is my job, since I don’t have one.

I once wanted stability and security so bad, it was driving me to anxiety and depression. It took sooooooooo long, only the last 3–4 years has that left me. I’m glad of it but wish I knew how it came about so I could bottle the stuff and sell it as an air freshener or something.

How secure do you feel in your life?
Since moving out of my family home, I’ve not lived in any one apt., condo’ or home for more than 3 years. Moving constantly has actually helped me release from most possessions which was tough because I love “nesting”, I love aesthetics. I’m ok now to keep on moving, being ok with just a few things and knowing from experience I’ll always land on my feet. It was crappy so many times until it just hit me one day that I’ve always made it through and instead of feeling unique in that, I’ve come to believe most people also make it through.

Your relationship?
I’ve had several long term ones and even though I’m about to be married, I know if something tragic happens, I’ll pull through, love always finds me even when I try to put my head in the sand. Because I’ve seen bad things happen to even good people, I try to keep myself focused on the present about the relationship, try to celebrate rather than grow accustomed to or take for granted. It seems to keep the shine on things, keep us trying rather than saying, “oh, looks like this is how it’s going to be, whatever.”

Your job?
The longest stretch I’ve pulled with one place is near 5 years, again, moving so much means I have to keep starting over. There has been little in the way of being able to rely on benefits, plan vacations or retirement funds. It only came with experience that I’m confident I can drop my suitcase in just about any town and have a job within a week’s time. Having stopped using credit cards more than a decade ago, I’m more fluid with money and know how much I need to get by minimally without panic.

I wish I’d been able to not be so afraid and panicked every time change or uncertainty came around. For me, I think I’m one of those people that has had to learn everything the hard stubborn way. If you can put a few people in your life you’re willing to let very close, they’ll be invaluable to get through the tough times with.